Help being comfortable alone

gentle_lemon · 2021-04-06T00:05:46+00:00

Honestly, when you go and do these things by yourself, no one is looking at you or wondering why.

Find hobbies. Find things that you are passionate about and engage in them. This will not only distract you from loneliness, but other guys will be into it too, thereby building the right kind of circle of friends.

If you want to continue being happy, keep women out of your life. Keep reading the horror stories on here. We aren't speaking from malice or anger; we are speaking from experience and trying to keep guys like yourselves out of problems.

DorkWadEater69 · 2021-04-06T00:10:03+00:00

A lot of being comfortable with yourself comes from getting older. At 19, I was terribly self conscious and placed a lot of stock on fitting in and the approval of others.

Now, nearly 30 years later, I find I just no longer give an fuck about most of that stuff. It wasn't something I consciously changed, it just happened naturally over time. You get tired and don't have the energy to sweat the small stuff anymore.

f3wl · 2021-04-06T00:16:06+00:00

It’s hard at your age, but realize happiness and fulfillment comes from within, not from external validation. Do your own thing. Ignore the NPCs. Find what makes you happy and pursue it.

mr_pro_con · 2021-04-06T00:46:30+00:00

Every harebrained scheme on the idiot box tv will be gospel to a girlfriend. You'd be in a relationship with her and everyone she talks to on social media. The pussy is not worth it. Pump and dump, at your age monk is a hard road, get your rocks off but don't let these entitled whores baby trap you.

show-me-the-numbers · 2021-04-06T03:12:32+00:00

As you educate yourself and go through your life making intelligent choices, you will internalize how moronic most people act and how idiotic their beliefs are. Armed with this healthy misanthropy, you can confidently stroll among the hoopleheads without a care for what their small minds think of you.

It's tough in your teens and 20s. Just get to your 30s without a child support payment or criminal record and you'll be doing good. It does get easier.

justadude713 · 2021-04-08T05:34:26+00:00

the quintessential mechanics of going your own way is making a way to live for one, in a world that is built for two.

go to places during off hours. mid-week, during the day. as for restaurants, just sit at the bar. always bring tablet w/headphones and watch something while you eat.
find the ones who are really doing well in school and who are in the hard sciences who are on a tangible career goal. thats probably your best bet.
...this is a mgtow forum, you're supposed to be past that already...

hope that helped, good luck young man!

haven20N · 2021-04-06T00:48:04+00:00

Organize your life with hobbies you like, can range from bodybuilding to welding.

Freedom is what mgtow is about, choosing what it feels right for you

Not giving a shit is a bonus

MrA_H0Ie · 2021-04-06T20:22:27+00:00

Maybe my solutions can help you, even if you are different and you have other needs than I do.

I was in a similar situation / mindset until I got into personal development based on MGTOW content and other sources (MGTOW wasn't the first PD content I found). Having a high education (physics, PhD) did not help to avoid the subservient mindset. I got into MGTOW after finishing my studies.

I don't have and I don't seek personal, real life contact with anyone. I found that my viewpoints, intelligence and interests are highly incompatible with most people, so I talk to people exclusively online - this opens up a much wider population with much more specific filters on interests and intelligence.

Making quality friends is based on honesty. Test them. Check how they react to your viewpoints and opinion about various levels of sensitive topics. I think the goal is not necessarily to find people with the same opinions as you have, because then there is no opportunity to learn anything (echo-chamber). But they should not try to tip-toe and obfuscate or try to guess what you think and say that. Most women are absolute experts at hiding their real opinion, this is the main reason they can't be friends with men.

I think being comfortable alone depends on whether you find something creative or useful that you really like to do and whether you resolve emotional contradictions efficiently (use good logic). So, personal development is necessary, be it MGTOW or stuff like Jordan B. Peterson's self-authoring or specialized literature for the control of emotions and other specialized content to develop skills for your interests (hobbies or work, ideally both combined into the same activities).

Good, regular exercise, good eating and sleeping habits are also necessary, and you need to do some outdoors activities. I really wanna sit all day in front of my computer but vitamin D deficiency can have really bad consequences, so I go out.

I think it's also important to take a break and have some fun. I watch Hololive, nothing else, all of the JP and EN branch (more JP) except Matsuri, but not so much the IN girls except Moona because she does a lot of collabs with the JP girls, and Ollie is pretty much unavoidable at this point. I have nothing against the IN or EN branch but I learn japanese, so I watch JP girls more.

Having a good financial plan also helps to calm you down. You can learn portfolio management and do some research on how to invest. If you're good at logical thinking, you can learn to code and use your own scripts for your investments, or you can use the service of professionals to take care of your investments. I don't trust anyone with my money so I do my analytics for it, but the skills and knowledge that goes into that are not easily accessible to anyone. It took me a decade at specialized research institutions to get to this level and then I could do some independent development (new indicators, strategies) to get ahead of the market.

Being independent has both benefits and drawbacks. The most clear benefit emotionally is for me the fact that I don't need to argue about anything with anyone. If I think something is a good idea I can do it instantly. The drawback is that if that decision is a crap shoot, I bear the consequences with full responsibility and I pay the price with no one to help me out. I'm fine with that. I learned to be as careful as necessary when assessing risks and benefits.

I did wanna have a family with kids, but the legal and social environment makes that an insanely stupid high risk, high stress, no reward, no guarantee decision. I refuse to be a straight up slave of the government supporting useless, parasitic, disrespectful hoes.

15 years after finishing my PhD I can sit on my investments and watch them grow. I don't wear stylish clothing, I don't have a car or a house. I try to appear poor AF. No one knows. No one thinks they can get a piece of the pie. I don't need a job. I just do some calculations to figure out what to buy and when to sell. And then I watch Hololive all day every day :)

Ah, I forgot... I think about getting a doll, but I'm not in a rush. Maybe first I'll move to a different country after I do some research about things like their legal system, social norms, history, political friction between their neighbors etc.

One last thing... Never ever have any sexual communication (not even flirting) with anyone at the same place where you study or work. Never. You'll regret if you do.

NightOuts · 2021-04-06T00:39:54+00:00

IMO just do it. You'd be surprised by how many people hit places alone. It's all mental. You just gotta do it. Go with some good tunes and enjoy the activities.

Do you like video games? I met many cool people playing playstation in different team based games or 1v1 games.

2) what is your dating past? As much as we mgtow preaches about staying single, i do feel like it is somewhat neccessary for men to atleast get in a relationship (short or long term ... preferrably short) to really understand everything. Once you date a bit, you'll get it out of your system.

iseedeer · 2021-04-06T06:39:12+00:00

Lots of responses about hobbies, which is great.

Just want to add that going to college in nyc is the opportunity of a lifetime. So, hobbies are great, but make sure they are hobbies that mesh with your long term goals.

For example, interested in business/finance? Then make becoming an expert in Python your hobby. Or even better, look into a minor/co-major in data science with goal of becoming expert in Linux, Python, and Postgres. All excellent solitary pursuits. And you don't have to go to the restaurant alone. After a Python or Postgres meetup it's common to get a beer and bite to eat.

Title	Help being comfortable alone
Author	fkuser250k
Upvotes	15
Comments	14
Date	April 5, 2021 11:52 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/mkydpu/help_being_comfortable_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/help-being-comfortable-alone.764771 https://theredarchive.com/post/764771

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