I tried to be the better person but I guess I failed.

unluckyduck69 · 2021-08-08T10:18:27+00:00

Reddit moment

CranverrySweet · 2021-08-08T10:24:42+00:00

Don't think this is the subreddit for that

Ariliescbk · 2021-08-08T09:49:54+00:00

Honestly, that was a pretty cringe-worthy read. You come across as quite pretentious. This is the trap of online dating, you judge someone before meeting them irl. No sympathy here, you fucked up. Just have to move on.

I get wanting to have desired traits, but you may as well make a clone of yourself and give it a sex change.

Keep-_-Out · 2021-08-08T12:28:07+00:00

Just move on. You don’t need to post this anywhere. You could talk about that with your buddies, but the internet does not care about your small inconvenience during this conversation on a hook-up app. Just grow up. This has nothing to do with mens rights.

To make it better, you should have just moved on. You didn’t need to explain anything to her. The conversation in the last 4 screen shots was a waste of time.

thefocus123 · 2021-08-08T09:52:14+00:00

No advice here. You just need to stay single.... super pretentious.

RunningAwayIn2You · 2021-08-08T10:40:13+00:00

I actually thought you were the woman in white… pretty pretentious.

ALeatherCatBee · 2021-08-08T09:40:32+00:00

Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Not that I want to talk to this person again but am I in the wrong for wanting basic, shared traits in a partner?

Maviarab · 2021-08-08T11:06:50+00:00

because your of?.....

Glass houses and all that.

MrRonchito · 2021-08-08T11:56:01+00:00

You're not only pretentious, but an immature too, it's OK to reject someone based on your own preferences, but keeping the arguing after that it's pretty childish, yet you're here asking for? Attention?

sneedsmemesanddreams · 2021-08-08T12:21:15+00:00

It's not wrong to have preferences, and you're not wrong to be picky with the girls you date. But you should also probably try to be a bit nicer with how you communicate those preferences to the people who don't fit them. You could have easily just wrote:

"Hey, thanks for hitting me up, but I'm not interested."

And left it at that. You're not this girl's dad, it's not your job or your right to correct the way she talks or writes. Yes, she shouldn't have freaked out, but you're not really "taking the high road" by being condescending.

If you're not interested, it's generally better to keep the reasons to yourself unless they ask, and even then you could just say:

"I don't think we share the same interests."

And cut it off. You don't need to correct her, teach her, or justify yourself to her. Taking the high road would also mean being willing to let the other person have the last word, so if she freaks out and cusses you out, just let it go and if she keeps harassing you, block her. You don't need to lecture her about her bad reaction. Not only does it not help her, but it also doesn't do anything for you. Again, you're not her dad.

If you want to correct her and lecture her, then by all means, go ahead. But then you kind of deserve whatever reaction you get, even if she should also just let it go and is in the wrong. Don't go around poking dogs and then complain when a dog barks at you.

MrProficient · 2021-08-08T11:25:38+00:00

Personally, I agree with you. I get annoyed with people when they text like that. I personally don't think it's being pretentious to like what you like. It's no different from anyone else having certain preferences that they are rigid and inflexible over. For anyone trying to down vote you, criticize you, or bitch at you is just being a hypocrite. Everyone has preferences that they will not bend over. Yours were clearly stated, but this person did not handle the rejection well. The only advice I get offer is just to say no thank you and stop responding. I get what it's like to have a knee-jerk reaction to somebody saying something that agitates you, but the truth is it's better to not allow them the ability to have an effect over you. This person is not someone you're interested in, so I question why you would allow them to have influence over you by agitating you to the point that you respond. If nothing else, she clearly dated you into an emotional reaction.

What advice I would recommend is, say no thanks and then stop responding. Oftentimes women complain about why guys will just stop responding and ghosting them. It's because of things like this, that even when you clearly say no they just have to keep going and going and going and going trying to provoke a response as a justification because they don't handle rejection well. It's been my experience that women generally do not experience rejection is often as men so they do not handle it as well as a guy can because he's more used to it.

Also, I think you need to let it go because you don't need any sort of validation to say that you were in the right the way you reacted. You have a preference, and your preferences valid. Just move on.

Title	I tried to be the better person but I guess I failed.
Author	ALeatherCatBee
Upvotes	0
Comments	68
Date	August 8, 2021 9:34 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/p0bq1p/i_tried_to_be_the_better_person_but_i_guess_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-tried-to-be-the-better-person-but-i-guess-i.822638 https://theredarchive.com/post/822638

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