My GF and mother of my son REALLY wants me to respect her privacy. I do not touch her cell phone, but I let mine lying around, as I do with my papers etc.

Some years ago she left me and I found out that she had been having an affair. I found out by hacking her facebook account and just letting her know what I had done and that I knew everything. Her female friends and even many of my male friends made me out to be the monster for looking into what she had been doing on facebook so as to understand where our relationship stood.

This time apart only lasted a few months and she came back. But while she was away I started hanging out with some guys who on occasion did some drugs. I told her that I had experimented too.

In my country we have freshwater availability issues so we are taught not to flush the toilet after a 'number 1' every time we use the loo.

Imagine my surprise when once she told me that she had been regularly checking my pee for drugs. She showed me the test strips too.

I do not know why she was doing this. I have never been on drugs while I was with her. But I feel that this was an invasion of my privacy, a form of manipulation and that I was being watched so that if I slipped up I would be 'punished'.

I am saying all this because I was being punished for my honesty while I was also punished for exposing her dishonesty.

Men and women are held to different standards.