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Effects of feminism and young men and boys

Aarya1324

July 7, 2020

25 upvotes

So ive recently been thinking abt it..

The feminists came and shamed men for their wrong doings in the past, like somehow men today are the responsible for it. They said the traditional gender roles of being a man was "toxic masculinity". Although they introduced women to traditionally male dominated fields like the STEM or politics but men were never introduced to female dominated fields like nursing. Slogans like "im a strong independent woman and i dont need no man" can influence a young boys mind and tell them they were not needed. Feminism changed the womens gender roles and gave them multiple alternatives but mens traditional gender roles were seen as not required anymore and i beleive they made young men and boys feel even more useless.

Thats what i beleive, what are your thoughts on it?

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Post Information

Title	Effects of feminism and young men and boys
Author	Aarya1324
Upvotes	25
Comments	16
Date	July 7, 2020 12:55 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/hmkjyj/effects_of_feminism_and_young_men_and_boys/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/effects-of-feminism-and-young-men-and-boys.848300 https://theredarchive.com/post/848300

Comments

[–]goodfoobar 15 points16 points17 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]life-give-you-lemons 8 points9 points10 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]Lumator 6 points7 points8 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]yoitsdavid 4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]life-give-you-lemons 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Aarya1324 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Suck-Less 5 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]kanray86 4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Aarya1324 2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Crumblecakez 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]Aarya1324 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Crumblecakez 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

There is a double standard that goes both ways yes.

But what I am saying is that a lot of men dont get introduced into female fields, etc is not solely because of feminism or even just women in general. Its also because men often wont let other men dress how they want, work where they want, act how they want, etc (even though women are encouraged to do whatever in all of this). Often times that 'toxic masculinity' isnt just aimed at women but at other men as well. Toxic masculinity aimed at women is a whole list of things that feminism is trying to change. However toxic masculinity aimed at men should be a concern of men, but most of the time it isnt and it's just used to mock or belittle feminism. Picking on little boys or men for showing emotions, not being 'manly' enough, going into certain jobs, dressing a certain way, etc. All of these are things that men attack other men for.

And while I can see where 'I dont need no man' could cause questions in young men there are still A LOT of ideas and phrases and such that are similar that have caused both young men and young women to question or worry. 'Dont be a pussy,' 'you look gay,' etc is equally as damaging to a young boy. And expecting little girls to play dolls and house and stay away from trucks or whatever is just as damaging. A lot of shit still goes on aimed at little girls and women and people are trying to change that. In the case of that one saying you bring up I think the reason that one took off is because for a very long time women were completely reliant on men and expected to be so by society. The idea of, 'you dont need a man you're strong and independent,' isnt an idea aimed at boys its aimed at girls to tell them they dont need to be dependent anymore and can do it on their own. Just like when people tell boys to stop trying to impress girls it isnt aimed at girls to tell them they arent worth it its aimed at boys to tell them to concentrate on themselves. Advice or saying or whatever while empowering and needed for one group can be taken wrong by a group they arent aimed at.

But when it comes to the things aimed at boys and men I usually only see men attacking what women do or say, very very rarely do I see men trying to fix what other men do. 'Toxic masculinity,' affects men too. That inequality in career fields and such is also a male based issue too.

Not saying it's not partly an issue with women but it isnt all coming from women. Women are toxic to other women often, but likewise men are toxic to other men too if not more.

[–]Aarya1324 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]goodfoobar 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

This looks like the standard feminist "male behaviour is naturally toxic and hurts other men too" rhetoric. Willing to guess you saw nothing wrong with the Gillette toxic masculinity advertisement.

for a very long time women were completely reliant on men

Men and women used to be reliant on each other. Then government came along and gave support to women only which created a gender in balance.

when people tell boys to stop trying to impress girls

Like the "Don't be that guy" and the "me too" feminist campaigns. Boys learning how to interact with girls is a way that boys can improve themselves.

I usually only see ~~men~~ people attacking what ~~women~~ feminists do or say

Women is not feminism, your confusing the two.

rarely do I see men trying to fix what other men do

This looks like the standard feminist line "men are naturally toxic and should police other men". The Gillette toxic masculinity advertisement tried to push the same stuff.

Feminism is toxic to both genders, it is debatable which is harmed more.

[–]Crumblecakez 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

🙄 Did I say all men? No I did not. I said toxic behavior is toxic behavior to everyone. Never saw the ad so I have no idea what you're talking about.

In what way were men reliant on women? Men made the decisions, they made the income, they decided what everyone could do in the household. Women had no income, few if any rights over random periods of time, and were often stuck in marriages because they had nowhere else to go.

I didn't say a thing about 'me too.' And if you are basing bettering yourself off of impressing the opposite gender then that's a you problem. That isnt healthy.

Nope. Feminism and women are different. And nope.

Again. I never said all men. I said men should spend more time also fixing what men are doing to eachother as a lot of that is harmful to themselves. Calling other men gay because of how they dress or they have emotions, pushing that it's the man's job to go out and about and the womans job to care for their children. There is a lot that is solely on men that they do that is bad for themselves. Never said it was all men though.

Feminism is not toxic. Are there people who do it wrong? Sure. Just like theres people who do anything wrong or too extreme.

Toxic masculinity is a thing regardless of if you want to accept that or not. It affects men just as much. How can men be equal and allowed to be themselves when many men base being 'manly,' off tearing eachother down and mocking everything or attacking for non traditional male things? You can be the manliest of men and not be toxic. Being masculine and being toxic and a bad influence are not the same thing. Little boys (and men) are just as harmed by men making fun of everything they do as they are by anything else.

...

I figured the mens rights subreddit would actually be a place to address mens rights and discuss things that should be changed and how to make it better. But literally all the majority of it is is men complaining about feminism or about how toxic masculinity and such are completely made up or about courts. Feminism exists because women have been treated as second class for a long time. Instead of taking that as a, 'hey as men let's also better things for ourselves,' apparently the popular idea here is, 'no those women are trying to change things therefore it harms us because we liked it how it was.' Again toxic masculinity is a thing. Toxic femininity is a thing too. But guess what. Women usually do correct eachother when they do just type of thing. Men very very rarely correct eachother for it. Instead again apparently the popular idea is to mock it and blame it on women. Men can be toxic to eachother and cause issues. You cant better life for your gender if you cant accept that fact. And do the courts need to be redone? Yes. Do men deserve more rights when it comes to custody and such? Obviously. But again, theres pretty much no talk about redoing the courts it's all complaining about having to pay child support or alimony period. Men are more likely to run out on parenting. Men are more likely to be the breadwinners while their spouse stays at home. You cant get rid of these things because those groups need help. If there were more single fathers due to crappy mothers, or more stay at home spouses were men then theyd be on the receiving end more often. Again no talk about redoing things just complaining. Do men suffer from sexual assault, etc? Yes they do. But I haven't seen a single post about what can be done about it. Literally all I saw was posts saying, 'oh women say its just them but its us too!' Yes. Yes it is. Now what?

Men have it unfair a lot. But unless you are going to address men body shaming eachother, mens toxic behavior toward eachother, how many men run out on children, how men can uplift eachother, etc etc then what's going to get fixed? If all you want to do is complain about what the other party is doing then that's on you but that doesnt fix anything. Again I never once said all men, just the ones doing wrong things. Women acknowledge for the most part when other women are doing the wrong thing and say something or try to correct it. That's what actual feminism is. All I've seen mens rights guys do is complain about women and how bad they have it without actually putting in the effort to so much as acknowledge what they could be doing for themselves or what some of them are doing to eachother. More than a few I've seen in here complaining that women want equality but dont give a damn about mens issues. Well this is why. Because it largely looks like men dont want to fix their issues, judging off of what's in here most dont even seem to know what the actual issues are. They just want to complain about women. And exactly why should women be trying to do anything for both sides when one side largely just wants to point fingers and complain. 'Oh that's all women do,' okay and? Not all women, not all feminists, are doing it right. There are plenty of extremists like in anything. But largely women have been working to correct things they do to eachother and regardless of if you want to admit it or not a lot of their problems come from men hence why its finger pointing. Mens problems come from women and from other men. What in here is getting anything done aside from complaining and trying to blame it all on women? Hell I gave bare examples of how men harm young boys mentally and eachother and instead of acknowledging that theres an issue there that is very common you went straight for, 'that sounds like common feminist bullshit.' Well sorry buddy if you refuse to acknowledge the issue that's not my problem but you dont sound like you're trying to correct anything at all you sound like you just want to blame women, or feminism specifically, for everything. Feminism wouldn't exist if there wasnt an issue. Just like the black lives matter or lgbtq lives matter movements wouldn't exist if there weren't issues. But being on the historically offending side of inequality for so long I imagine it's hard to see.

[–]goodfoobar 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Never saw the ad

This means you have not been looking into men's rights for very long. It was a big issue during the first quarter of 2019. https://duckduckgo.com/?q=gillette+toxic+masculinity+advertisement

In what way were men reliant on women?

Unmarried women had the same rights as unmarried men. Married men became responsible for their wife's debts and behaviours. Read about one case under Coverture law where a rich woman married a poor man. A prenup meant the woman kept control over her land. The couple split up, she stopped paying property taxes, he went to debtors prison for non payment of taxes. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coverture

Toxic masculinity is a thing

Toxic people are a thing. Feminism supports toxic female behaviour while condemning normal healthy male behaviour.

Do men deserve more rights when it comes to custody and such?

Men deserve equal rights. Currently they don't have equal reproductive right. Male reproductive rights end with the right to say no to sex. Even then there are statutory rape cases where the male victim had to pay alimony to his rapist.

Men are more likely to run out on parenting.

Men are more likely to be blocked from being allowed to do any parenting. This is in big part due to feminist lead "tender years doctrine".

Men are more likely to be the breadwinners while their spouse stays at home.

I'm personally aware of more cases where the wife is the breadwinner while the husband stays at home then the way you described.

address men body shaming eachother, mens toxic behavior toward eachother

The first step is identifying where that shame comes from. What is the origin of the following male shaming campaigns? "me too" "don't be that guy"

What in here is getting anything done aside from complaining and trying to blame it all on women?

Feminism gets blamed a lot, not women. Once again Feminism is not women, they are different things. Feminism is toxic to both genders, it is debatable which is harmed more.