Mod asked me to make this a fresh post, so here it is:

It's not politically correct to say, but women (on average) seem to place a higher premium on emotional validation than logic and self-criticism. We're all aware of the cliche of a woman telling her boyfriend about some problem only to get angry when he offers a rational solution. "I don't want a solution, I just want to vent."

Taking responsibility seems to be more difficult for women, at least in the current climate. Even extremely powerful figures like Hillary Clinton refuse to hold themselves accountable. She blamed everyone but herself for her loss to Trump. Or take someone like the labor MP Jess Phillips, a "strong empowered woman" who mocked Philip Davies for talking about international men's day and male suicide. She responded not by accepting responsibility for her appalling behavior but reverting to a damsel in distress who supposedly received a torrent of "rape threats" (none of which were apparently real).

These traits may be biological or cultural or both. Certainly feminism doesn't help matters, as it seeks to eliminate female responsibility entirely. On the one hand they claim to be "dismantling gender roles", on the other they reinforce female stereotypes to the nth degree.

There is a tendency for women in groups to "emotionally support" one another by essentially saying "you're not responsible for what happened to you -- HE IS." This is the classic actor/acted upon dichotomy that even some feminists have recognized (albeit only in certain contexts) -- the man is an agent, the woman is a passive victim. Sometimes this is taken to absurd degrees. Eg I've read feminist defenses of female serial killers like Aileen Wuornos. The upshot of all this is that women can very easily get bad advice by their "sisters", especially when the topic is men, because the goal is not to solve a problem and improve herself but to validate her feelings (then, when the group breaks up, the women will say what they really think -- behind her back).

Men act very differently (again, on average). They are more likely say, "you fucked up, you acted badly, now here's how to correct the problem and improve yourself."

Just to be clear, I'm not saying that male in group dynamics are without fault (sometimes there is a tendency to place all of the responsibility on the man even when he needs emotional support), or that women never engage in logical self-reflection. But you get my point.

Feminism makes these tendencies ten times worse because now everything can simply be blamed on the mythical patriarchy.

I agree with OP that female spaces are becoming increasingly toxic. One of the ways that women can achieve social status is by being attractive to men. Another way is by being a victim (paradoxically, female "weakness" is actually a form of power). This is one of the reasons that falsely claiming to be a "sexual assault victim" is so enticing. In the current social climate it increases the status of the alleged victim.

I find current female spaces legitimately frightening, as there is a strong tendency to censor and abuse people for the mere act of hurting someone's feelings. This is not an environment in which intellectual inquiry and progress can be maintained. Ironically, in their attempt to make every woman (no matter how neurotic) feel "safe", they make everyone else feel unsafe.

Scary times for men.