Dear State Representative Dale Kooyenga,

As a woman I am ashamed of how society is so fixed on equal rights for women while taking away rights from men. I am married to an amazing man with whom I am raising four children with. When he was in high school his girlfriend became pregnant. While he knew he did not want children it was later learned she became pregnant on purpose. As the mother of his son told me ''I knew he would be a great father but why you and not me?'' Leading me to why I am writing you. In Wood County Wisconsin at birth custody and placement is automatically given to the mother. Forcing the dad to pursue the courts to even see his child/children. My husband was then just 17 years old. At the first hearing for child support he started out almost $5000 in arrears including the birthing costs. He was immediately unable to register a vehicle which the mother laughed about. He was later arrested several times while trying to catch up on support. Obviously this would be overwhelming for anyone. Also leaving him in fear to enter the courts and ask for and rights. He was treated like a deadbeat dad from the beginning. Even being belittled by the girl who gave birth to his child. She told him to stay away for the good of her son. He complied seeing no other options. At this point he is finally caught up with child support and in turn she learns he has a family and becomes enraged therefore as she puts it ''taking him for all he has''.We sought legal advice from several attorneys who have informed us she will get her adjustment including is overtime pay. Although his job position was cut his child support is based on an amount he no longer makes. Which will force him to get a second job to support our household while still not being able to see a son he can not see. On top of that when we go to the court hearing they will backdate the order leaving my husband is arrears once again. As the attorneys we consulted also informed us there is no point in pursuing any visitation. Apparently in this particular county it would cost an abundance of money and the outcomes are not favorable for the dads.

The above has led me to several issues with our system. First if a woman/mother is on state insurance the man/father is responsible for 100% of the birthing cost if the parents are unmarried. Why is the woman/mother given a pass on contributing? Then the man/father is required to carry insurance for the child while in turn the woman/mother and child qualify for state insurance to cover any cost not covered by the insurance the man/father carries. Once again giving the woman/mother a pass on contributing. Woman have options when faced with an unwanted pregnancy leaving them the right to opt out of any and all responsibility. Meanwhile the men are left at their mercy of the pregnant woman. A woman can force a man into fathering their child making him responsible while giving him no rights.

This is not just a disgrace to the men/fathers but an injustice to these children. It's overwhelmingly overdue to reevaluate custody, placement, visitation, and child support for the sake of the children and their relationship with both parents.

Sincerely, Hollie