TL;DR I'm making waves with girls at med school. My friend says people in our school have been complaining to her about me being "handsy". I don't remember doing anything, and in fact girls have been touching ME. I don't know how to handle it.

I've been on TRP since early 2014 and have read the sidebar. I'm going to be as honest as I can be without identifying myself, and would appreciate if you would take this post at face value.

TRP has changed my life and I've been on an upward trajectory ever since I first subscribed. Part of this has been me putting in the work professionally/academically, and this has culminated in my acceptance at prestigious medical school. I'm about two weeks from finishing my first year.

When I first started the program I assumed it was going to be filled with very serious students and I wasn't going to be partying or going out in any serious capacity, but instead our class is very fun and social and there are events going on every weekend. I've been going out and making friends and generally have been really happy here.

However, one of my good friends here (lets call her Kelly) has been avoiding me this past week. She finally came and talked to me crying saying multiple people have been coming up to her saying I've been really handsy with them while drunk and she can't handle it anymore. Kelly couldn't (or wouldn't) give me any specific times, places, or people but she made it sound like an epidemic.

The only example Kelly could give me was the morning after a party I threw. A bunch of us crashed on my living room floor and I was spooning with a girl in the morning. BUT this girl had been flirting with me all night, had put her legs on me multiple times, etc. I thought it was reciprocated but I guess I was wrong.

To her credit, I got blackout drunk one night last semester and got forward with a girl visiting for the weekend. I took it as a lesson to be more careful while drinking and have not gotten that drunk since.

Kelly also said that twice last semester I had gotten handsy with her and she was uncomfortable at the time, but didn't say anything. I'm not sure how serious this is because Kelly's overweight and I have zero attraction to her. One was I put my arm around her when we crashed together on a couch. The second was me hugging her too long at a party. (???) But she also admitted there haven't been any incidents this semester.

HERE IS MY DILEMMA

I have no idea where these accusations are coming from. I've been out at parties and hosting stuff at my house but haven't been grabbing asses or trying to kiss girls. Sometimes I get drunk but never to the point of memory loss. I honestly don't know what she's talking about.

Normally I would just say I'm an unattractive beta and girls are getting creeped out by normal touches/light kino. But this ENTIRE YEAR girls have been getting really touchy with ME. I don't consider myself a chad or anything, but I'm 6'3" 220lbs in good shape and this program is 80% women. The few guys that are around are unavailable or unattractive so it can get kinda crazy, especially when alcohol is involved.

Girls rub my chest and arms, grab my ass, hug me really tightly and don't let go, ask me to pick them up, etc. A lot of these girls have boyfriends. Sometimes it's more serious stuff like girls sitting on my lap, trying to put their hand down my pants, kissing my neck, etc. I personally am not bothered by it but I just don't understand how they can do that - in public! - and people are accusing me of...I don't even know.

One girl with a boyfriend also in our class was getting really touchy and telling me we should hang out alone. I told her that wasn't a good idea and she ended up backtracking and crying to some people about how "I was trying to break them up". Luckily I had texts from her calling him unattractive but it could have ended up much worse. Another time a girl with a fiance sat on top of me at a party trying to get me to kiss her. I didn't do it and was very clearly trying to disengage, but a lot of people saw it go down. I don't know if this helps or hurts me.

I've been avoiding shitting where I eat for obvious reasons, with 3 unsuccessful attempts.

  1. Girl jumped me when we were all out at a bar. She was hot so I went with it and we hooked up a few times. I stopped hitting her up because she wasn't very pleasant to be around, but things are fine between us when we interact at school. She chooses not to hang out with people in our class so nothing really changed and I don't think it's contributing to this.

  2. Thought I was getting IOIs from a girl in my friend group, so I asked her out in person after lecture. I was way off. She reacted very poorly and ignored me for a while. Because I'm such a key part of the social life here, we're forced to see each other and hang out. She's slowly coming around. But again, I wasn't even talking to her let alone touching her.

  3. The girl I mentioned before. This is probably the biggest contributing factor (along with the stuff from last semester). She is good friends with Kelly. She told me she was seeing someone so maybe was trying to cover her ass about flirting with me.

Following girl 3, I made a very hard rule about not hitting on girls in my class and I've stuck to it. I have no problems meeting and plating girls outside my class. I don't know why my radar is so off. Regardless, I'm not making moves any more.

Besides Kelly, no one else has been treating me differently. Girls are still inviting me out to events, making plans with me for the summer, hugging me, talking with me normally, sitting next to me in class, studying with me, coming over for group dinner/movie, etc. Not in a sexual way (that only happens when they're drunk), just the same normal friendly interactions we've always been having. A decent amount of the girls have boyfriends who I've met and they're all cool with me; some even add me on Snapchat and send me stuff. Most of these girls are fairly attractive too, so I assume if I was somehow blacking out without realizing it would be one of them I'm touching?

The whole thing is really confusing. I brought it up with some other trustworthy people in my class individually and no one said they heard anything. I want to make it through this program without getting expelled or arrested. I don't think I'm at risk for that but I'm documenting everything. I also would prefer to remain friends with Kelly. Beyond this incident she's been a really good friend who has done a lot for me, but obviously all this is making me wary about being alone with her.

Sorry for the length. I'm looking for theories, advice, tips. I'm totally confused so any help is much appreciated.