Need advice from anyone on what to do and why my mind is so conflicted.

Back story Me (m 33) and my ex (f 32) dated for 6 years and then married for 2 so a total of 8 years We had a child during Covid together he is now 4 she also had a daughter I've raised since 3 she is now 11 About a year before my son was born she became a "stay at home mom" which i was fine with so I took care of finances last 5 years or so. that's when it started going bad. I was dealing with her mentally and verbally abusing me (telling me how big of a pos father i am, how im less of a man because i dont make 7 figures (I make right under 6 figures after taxes which is great where I live ) everyday all she would text me at work was fuck me or how much she hated me how she wished I'd die etc start arguments over anything I did she constantly wake me up just to say how much she hated me (I work 12 hour days as a chef) also not having sex (maybe 3 times in last 2 years We were together)

I've been seperated for about a year now (2 months left) and in the state I currently reside you have to be seperated for over a year to be officially divorced by the courts.. since the separation I've lived in my car for most of it (she locked me out of joint accounts and drained savings, it took weeks for my job to cancel direct deposit to joint acct. Basically im just now starting to get back on my feet financially. I pay over 1.5k Monthly for my son ( daycare, food, clothes , school) and I have no issue doing this but as most divirced parents the mother won't let me see my son or daughter (step daughter) unless she needs a babysitter. Or if im forking over more money. since im homeless I get a hotel when im able to see them.

Before we sperated, shocker i was caught off guard thinking everything was good out of the blue she becomes cold and distant. She doesnt wanna fuck, just argues, puts me down, and is overall just confrontational and passive aggressive to just play the victim when i lose it.. The official reason We seperated was because she said "i need to find myself" aka fuck other men or see if there anything better. She was always a little chunky but has now been going to gym and lost it which I think is cool but anytime we talk she constantly blames me saying it was my fault she was fat (im a chef btw) and how I never cared about how she looked . (Granite i didnt care at all how she looked tbh if i wanted to date someone better in the looks or figure category I would have im more into deep convo connections etc you know the cheesy shit) I also work out regularly and have said many time in past for her to come to the gym, there was always some excuse or being told I don't like how she looks blah blah blah

Up to date Well anyways for the past few weeks she been trying to hang out being nice trying to talk until I start conversations then she ghosts every single time like its a game to see if she can get me to respond just to ignore to see how long before I react to the disrespect. Well the other day (4 days ago I was over there dropping my kids off) anyways she was being very flirty and nice to me like she wants to make it work again saying how she loves me and will make it work etc, long story short we end up having sex ( very passionate lots of kissing etc) she cums mutiple times i dont cum at all and we stop (which I thought was weird already because we used to fuck till we both came at least once) anyways i leave later that night she texting me all this fake bs about how we can make it work how she wants me how she's so sorry ect and my dumbass falls for that shit again that night.. moving forward since then she has become colder ignored every message I sent every call took our daughters phone (which I pay for) blocked my number so me and her cant talk (which was my normal way to communicate with her and my son because their mom never responds or answers) anytime I try to ask her to be honest on why she lied about wanting us, just to have sex with me she ignores me or spazzes saying im a child and need to grow up. The last thing spoke about it was her saying "i didnt rape you" and "if you didnt want to.you shouldnt have let me" (yes I a shouldn't have done it it was a moment of weakness because I really wanted my family back and thought she felt the same by the passion she gave thats day) but anyways my question is what was the point of her doing that? Was it to play mind games? Was it too see if I still wanted her? Was it to just cum? Also if she just wanted to hook up why would she go thru the trouble lying acting like she wanted us etc im honestly lost about it and confused because of her being cold and not giving a single fuck about talking about it. Hell even talking in general if anyone has any advice or comments please help im stuck and it hurts