Divorcing Dad

dday_throwaway3 · 2018-04-29T14:42:49+00:00

Status quo is the greatest bias of the court.

she took the kids

What temporary custody and support orders are in place from the court? If you do not have temp court orders, then you need to immediately get them in place. Do not allow your STBXW to establish new status quo for your kids, such as moving them to a new school district. If you are not represented by an attorney, then that's task #1.

She can move out, but the kids stay in their current school district. That's in their best interest.

Since you've been a SAHD, then you should fully expect the court to order her to continue paying for the martial residence rent/mortgage, utilities, groceries, etc as well as pay you temporary child support and alimony. You must act with haste to secure your position.

Daddyquag · 2018-04-29T04:26:15+00:00

In the same position. Only mine was 1 month ago. Get an aggressive lawyer. Start going to the gym, go do a hobby you did before you met her. Do anything and realize this is only temporary. You will see the kids again. The law is on your side. Push for Co-parenting classes etc.

Daddyquag · 2018-04-29T04:34:17+00:00

The apartment isn’t all that important in my opinion. Do what you can to keep positive and know in your head and your heart that your kids won’t forget you. They are the most important thing. She is trying to hurt you now, keep minimum contact even though it’s hard. But the lawyer on Monday will give you a timeframe of what you need and can do. Until then stay safe, keep busy somehow and know your not alone.

Daddyquag · 2018-04-29T05:02:21+00:00

I would not have any contact until you speak to you lawyer. He’s the only one working for you. If they want to pick up things make them give you a list and leave the things outside. Don’t let her in. She left, let her be gone until you can force her legally to do what you need. That’s just my opinion. But everything she is doing now should be viewed suspiciously. The law will make sure your kids have adequate time with you.

BuildZwall · 2018-04-29T13:30:42+00:00

How on earth do you know they are good

suckittreb3k · 2018-04-29T05:11:10+00:00

Um, if gender roles were reversed, she would have called the police. No doubt.

She'd be crying, getting sympathy.

If you have been the stay at home dad for a significant amount of time, you're in a position of power which disgusts me. Usually it's the SAHM that financially and emotionally rapes the dad in divorce.

Typically, mom cries about giving up career. Now she's unemployable. Court hands her oodles of money, for her. Then, a child support calculator spits out a ridiculous amount of money to mom because it's "in the best interest of the child to turn dad into a visitor" Seriously.

IMO: Don't do this shit to your kids. Tell your POS STBXW you have leverage, but will be willing to share time with kids equally. No child support; unless you're in an income shares state that fairly equalizes the support number based on INCOME AND TIME.

Your kids need both parents in their life, equally when both parents are fit and non abusive.

She might think she has the power right now. She doesn't if you truly were a long-term SAHD.

Get a Male lawyer that KNOWS your County well. He's going to salivate at your case because it's rare the dads have leverage. Chances are, the last gazillion dads he represented got shafted by the court and he hates it.

Go do what's best for your kid(s)... equal time, no drama.

flinderdude · 2018-04-29T03:52:40+00:00

Wow, you stayed home but she got them?

BuildZwall · 2018-04-29T05:08:13+00:00

One of her brothers is a cop and he will be there too but not on duty, she has told everyone its because of drugs and yet she was doing drugs also however she failed to say that. Ive stop all negative contact. Started aa and hired a specalist in drug counseling for myself

BuildZwall · 2018-04-29T14:45:56+00:00

Contacting allot now but its Sunday that said no temp orders are in place

Title	Divorcing Dad
Author	BuildZwall
Upvotes	5
Comments	16
Date	April 29, 2018 3:34 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/8foxb8/divorcing_dad/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/divorcing-dad.820170 https://theredarchive.com/post/820170

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