New here and appreciating the existence of such a community on reddit. Thanks guys for all the support you are providing or honest conversations you are opening.

Pardon the overly bureaucratic tone of the question, but one thing that I just read here is that one of the biggest mistakes one can make is not dedicate enough time to the divorce, notably the legal and administrative part of it.

That is without a doubt what I have been doing up until now. I have known for 4 months this was coming when my ex-wife, still living with me until now, unilaterally decided to have ‘the talk’ with the kids yesterday evening. Now I expect (and tbh, I hope) that she will be out of the house within a couple of weeks max.

I have done practically nothing to prepare for that and now realise I have wasted a lot of time. Is 1/2 day a week dedicated to the question of organisation and paperwork until all is done reasonable?

I am aware they are other aspects to the question: time spent with the kids helping them through it, time I need to spend “on myself.”

But I am afraid of the consequences of drowning and pouring energy in everything else than the necessary organisational and paper work aspects of the divorce.

I am a very involved father/homemaker while also working a job that keeps me busy at all hours of the day and night, all the while I have a sleep apnea issue which leaves me rather limited on energy. I know I need to be very deliberate with my time.

Thanks in advance for the help!