Some of the comments underneath this post

christina_murray_ · 2024-02-24T18:31:11+00:00

After this case, Sarah’s friend (Helena Edwards) even wrote an article saying this is not what Sarah would have wanted, and that she’d have been unhappy with the misandrist talking points being peddled. Sarah sounded like an angel honestly, and the “man” who killed him was scum. She was killed by a monster, not a “man”.

Off the back of this, there was a study where 97% of women said they’d experience some form of abuse/sexual harassment from a man. The difficulty with that study is we don’t know how loosely they were defining sexual harassment- staring, whistling and even hugging have been things that have been labelled as harassment in recent years. So if this study includes them, then not only does it skew/inflate the stats, it minimises the experience of those women who’ve genuinely experienced traumatic sexual assaults/abusive behaviours from men.

Looking at the comments, there’s quite a bit of “how come every woman has a story about sexual assault but no man knows a rapist”… I guess there’s 3 reasons- 1) men don’t all know each other, 2) there’s a large amount of repeat offenders, and 3) the men who commit such a heinous act as rape aren’t going to freely admit to doing so.

Lots of “even if it’s the majority of men that are good we have to be cautious because we don’t know if they’ll be one of the 3-4% of bad ones”…. but if somebody used that exact same logic towards women, it would be sexism…. also who is “we”? I’m a woman and I’m not paranoid that every man is out to hurt me…

“A woman died and you’re crying about what someone on Twitter called you”… hmm, an interesting one. Because you could just as easily say “a woman died, and you’re hijacking this poor woman’s death just to try and vilify 50% of the population and present them as a threat”.

“We know it’s not all men but it’s enough men to make us feel cautious; it’s too many men”- wouldn’t 1 man be too many? And so by that same logic, it’s also too many women. Honestly it’s the same logic that racists use against black people.

“It’s helpful to compare men to inanimate objects to help them understand and empathise”- by dehumanising them? I empathise with Sarah’s family and friends- for somebody to die in such a brutal and painful way by a person who’s supposed to protect is nothing short of a tragedy. People using that to try and gain extra points in the “gender war” can fuck off.

“We’ve had bad experiences with men so we can’t trust men walking behind us”… but you can trust women fine? What if you’ve been abused by another woman? Or regularly had negative experiences with other women that you may not have had with men? You’d still trust/not fear women, when you would fear/not trust men?

I don’t get it myself- if I’m walking on my own in the day, whether it’s a man or a woman, it doesn’t bother me- I don’t assume the worst. If for whatever reason I’m out at night, I’d probably take more precautions but it wouldn’t be because of what “men” potentially might do- it’s because of what people potentially might do…

And, it’s 2024 and these people are otherwise proudly “woke” and “progressive”- they’ve embraced so many new different gender identities (such as non-binary), so by their own logic, how do they know if somebody walking behind them identifies as male and isn’t “non-binary”? If they think it’s wrong to judge gender on outward appearance due to all the new identities emerging, then how do they know who to consider a man or not?

“We use analogies comparing men to ticks to explain why we generalize things”… mass generalisations aren’t helpful. Even if most abusive rapists are men, most men aren’t abusive rapists.

“We can’t leave our homes without feeling unsafe”- who is “we”? It’s certainly not something that consumes me personally… I think social media has instilled this fear into a lot of us women, especially younger women. And plus feeling unsafe is different to actually being unsafe.

“1 in 3 women are raped every day” a tragic stat if true… we don’t have an accurate comparison stat for men though because many countries don’t legally recognise rape of males as rape, plus there’s the underreporting, plus there’s the fact that many men may not realise they’ve been raped due to society’s gendered focus or due to the societal assumption that erection= consent when it doesn’t.

“Women are being killed and raped”… which is just awful, I agree. “Men” as a collective aren’t responsible though- the individuals who murder and rape women are. Most men don’t do those things.

“Stop it with your not all men bullshit”… if somebody made a mass generalisation about Muslim terrorists, and a page like this called it out, I wonder would she be saying “stop with your not all Muslim bullshit?”

lumpynose · 2024-02-24T20:28:01+00:00

My theory is that it's evolutionary psychology. Women have an innate survival trait that makes them worry about being raped or mugged. In the old days women lived with their parents or a sibling until they got married and didn't go out alone at night. Now, women have to go out alone at night regularly, especially in the winter. So now this innate fear is being exercised (triggered) if you will, on a regular basis. They're like a kid who never outgrew being afraid of the dark.

The problem with recognizing these innate traits is that they're effectively invisible; we don't think about them, they're just automatically true. And because they're in our DNA they're a part of our species and therefore come out in advertising, movies, etc. so it makes it easy for people to blame society. But they've got the direction of influence backwards; they're going from people to society, not from society to people.

Title	Some of the comments underneath this post
Author	christina_murray_
Upvotes	8
Comments	3
Date	February 24, 2024 6:04 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/EverydayMisandry
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/everydaymisandry/comments/1az0ysc/some_of_the_comments_underneath_this_post/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/EverydayMisandry/some-of-the-comments-underneath-this-post.1246327 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246327

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