Getting over feeling creepy?

AcanthaceaeAnnual589 · 2024-11-07T20:10:03+00:00

Hi, 24F here. Mmm so firstly, why do you assume they think you’re creepy? It seems more likely to me they sensed you were interested in them romantically, but didn’t feel the same way, so distanced themselves? Or it could be that women often have lots of close friends, whereas idk do you not have that many friends? Only reason I say that is it could be that you are perceiving them as ‘dropping you’ when in reality you were always more of a casual friendship and they’re just busy with other friends? It’s hard to know with little context.

With creepy guys, the main thing is they’re PUSHY. Women are taught to be friendly and polite, but some men take that as romantic interest and do things like touch you a lot/in a romantic way, lean in very close, make hints at a romance between you, and even though you weren’t returning any signals you were interested back, because you’re being friendly to them still, they take that as a green light to keep going.

One example is I was at a party and making small talk with this guy. I wasn’t interested in him but I felt I should be polite and it’s nice to make friends. I asked him general small talk questions, smiled/laughed a little at things he said, but he took all this as romantic interest. He was grabbing me by the waist, following me round the party the rest of the night, making hints at us being together.

The thing is, when he started doing these things I didn’t return any of them. I didn’t touch him back, i didn’t lean into him when he touched me, i didn’t joke back about us being together, i didn’t follow him round the party, i barely even looked his way the rest of the night to give a CLEAR signal.

What feels creepy is when someone is not picking up that you’re not interested, or even worse, when you think they do know you’re not interested, but THEY DONT CARE. And they keep PUSHING. Because that’s scary.

So moral of the story: you will know when someone likes you back. They won’t just smile and be friendly and polite, they will touch you lingeringly, flirt with you, try to get you alone, return your gestures. If they don’t do this, very quickly assume they’re not interested and pull back. Then that’s not creepy. It’s also kinda creepy when a guy tries it on with every girl so don’t do that, save it for a girl you acc like. It makes us feel like people, not walking vaginas or girl #4 on a to do list. Hope that helps!

SweelFor- · 2024-11-07T23:59:12+00:00

Is it possible that the reason why you think that, is that you've consumed content that has mad you think this way?

sensibl3chuckle · 2024-11-12T13:57:11+00:00

"I think Mark Manson speaks a lot about intentions too but it just seems weird and totally against my nature to go up to also someone and say "hey you're hot let's talk"..."

You should give it a try. Maybe something like, "I thought you were attractive so I wanted to introduce myself".

It takes some courage because it risks the interaction. You don't want to say your true intentions and you don't want to risk anything so you seem ambiguous, creepy.

violetaurelias · 2024-11-12T10:45:25+00:00

Ok, so women in general are way more picky and will drop someone over their icks. So it's not that you have some problem, but that most women know what they want and can vet whether you fit their criteria pretty quickly.

It sounds like you're awkward in interactions with women, thus making them uninterested in flirting or romance. Watch videos like Charisma on Commands to learn the styles of communication that work, and what people actually like. Most people want to have a good time together, but it actually takes pointed effort to have a smooth and fun conversation, and to flirt.

Title	Getting over feeling creepy?
Author	OkAdagio4389
Upvotes	15
Comments	20
Date	November 7, 2024 4:55 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1glv4kv/getting_over_feeling_creepy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/getting-over-feeling-creepy.1534960 https://theredarchive.com/post/1534960

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