I don't know why never having a relationship, bothers me so much.

I've tried to change my appearance, be confident, try to put myself out in public even if everything in my body says to not do it.

One of my last therapy sessions was about acceptance, but I want to battle it, want to be handsome, get validation, get attention, or just a relationship. Sex sounds really cool, but only in a caring relationship, at least for myself. Casual flings or escorts would do nothing.

Getting "Females" as redpillers would say and "Pump and dump" has never been my priority.

I'm thinking that either I need to accept for whatever reason, relationships with women aren't possible.

Or accept I'm frustrated, in more ways than one, and just keep on trying with no luck?