How To Save Brother

J-hophop · 2026-06-13T21:00:58+00:00

Kudos on being a good person and a good brother.

Firstly, IF it's possible, ask for an extension of a day or two for the term paper because of a(n unspecified) family emergency and/or MH crisis. I know, that's not always a real option, but when it is, use it appropriately to take a mental health day when needed dude 🤷‍♀️

Secondly, be aware this is going to be a marathon, not a sprint. You can't do much in short order. So calming and then focusing on your work for a couple days is fine before getting to fixing this with him.

Tertiarily, it WILL be up to him to fix it, or not, but absolutely you should help him see he needs to and help him do so.

Model good behaviour, and don't brook his bad at all. So like don't over-guilt or alienate him when he says something terrible, bit do just shut it down with things like "That's not funny dude." Or "It's not okay to talk about women like that." (or whichever group) Or "Why does it matter to you what's in someone's pants or what they do in the bedroom?!? Don't be weird like that. It's kinda creepy." And where you can, add things like "I have a friend that's gay and he's an awesome guy, don't talk like that around me bro."

Chances are your li'l bro looks up to you. So use that. Just model a better way.

Over time, slowly add more details and get into it with him and/or ask some questions about where he heard shit like that and just try to denounce it as a bad source.

As I said, just be gentle and don't alienate him at this stage. If he ends up still like this at like 27 years old or something, THEN get seriously harsh and maybe even cut him out of your life, but right now, he's still developing, and for some reason he's just gotten off course. Just try to put him back on course.

berserk_panda · 2026-06-13T21:09:14+00:00

This issue is not going to be fixed over night. I think your brother needs to be exposed to new ideas and people. He’s still pretty young so he might just grow out of it. I think trying to encourage him to try new hobbies and meet more people in the real world is probably the best way to expose him to new ideas. If this doesn’t work I would just try to not to worry about it and try to set an example by thriving on your own and being a good sibling. It might rub off on him

GGSPSkywalker · 2026-06-14T11:25:26+00:00

He's a teenager, and as everyone of them, he's trying to fit in and find himself in the world. Bring him along whenever you go out with friends, break his "isolation", be the cool brother, show him the world, he's gonna find it much better than that redpill masculinist crap.

Flourescendrama · 2026-06-15T17:32:46+00:00

You're a good brother, truly. It must be awful living in a strict Islamic family, and even worse to have your brother with incel views. I advise you to try talking to him privately and in an understanding way. It might seem silly, but don't let your parents' ideas influence your brother or you.

Khaleesi-Unnie · 2026-06-15T18:24:14+00:00

Please take care of yourself and do your term paper. There is a way to address this via your family's religious background being an asset. I am Muslim and currently, even mainstream imams are trying to grapple with the fact that more Muslim young men are following incel, manosphere influencers, many of whom have converted to Islam but do not respect the mainstream Muslim community. There is even a space to address the homophobia and transphobia your brother is being exposed to because even though our community struggles with these issues and our religious beliefs, after the Pulse Nightclub shooting, space has been created by mainstream imams to condemn violent dehumanizing rhetoric against these communities. Feel free to direct message me and I can offer you some resources based on the city you are located.

Personal_Dirt3089 · 2026-06-13T20:56:42+00:00

Honestly, this is a hard one. Look, you can't fix everything. That hurts to hold to. I get that. And the weird irony is that people that are homophobic, transphobic, etc tend to torture themselves a lot over this stuff. First hand, I can tell you, it sucks to see a family member torturing himself with this. Adding in religion makes it even more weird because religion overrides logic.

If it was just the redpill, this would be more workable because we can very easily prove the redpill is a scam.

princessbubbbles · 2026-06-13T21:37:30+00:00

There is not a ton you can do. It sounds like you aren't living with him, which means less interaction. If you're a woman, that makes it even harder, as he is less likely to listen to you. Try to be there for him and assist in emotional processing, encourage his interests, help him slowly expand his world (which may be small right now), and ask him to join you in new experiences. It is ultimately up to him to change.

Title	How To Save Brother
Author	12345ilovecarrots
Upvotes	5
Comments	10
Date	June 13, 2026 8:33 PM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1u51eq7/how_to_save_brother/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/how-to-save-brother.1582749 https://theredarchive.com/post/1582749

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