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Hi,

The redpill views I've developed have helped me achieve healthier and longer-lasting relationships.

Are there more practical views that would help in a modern relationship? I'm not looking for moral answers. I'm looking for practical views.

The kind of views I hold

CLINGY is good - fetishising daddy issues is not good, but I think a lack of emotional independence from both sides is important to maintain a loving relationship. like scratching each other's backs.

In that sense, an emotionally unstable partner is what to look for when trying to experience love in its highest intensity regardless of the cause of that instability. So as a result I don't look for independent women who claim they don't need a relationship/man despite inwardly wanting one because women like me are also human, sociable creatures who get lonely. Instead, I find myself more willing to put in effort with somebody who is more open about their desires for a relationship despite them being more emotionally vulnerable (going for someone "easy"/more easy to manipulate, not because of these traits but because of their openness to their desires for a relationship).

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POWER is important - sociology study I read, higher relationship satisfaction by both parties in a heterosexual relationship when the man's perceptions of their own power in the relationship was high, regardless of the woman's perception of their own power in the relationship.

So what I got from this study, is that men having confidence in having control over the relationship creates greater relationship satisfaction for both parties, so dating advice to women that they shouldn't date narcissists and egotistical men is an ignorant assertion. And potentially men should be doing activities which bolster their confidence in order to create greater relationship satisfaction overall. Even if that does mean not viewing their partner as their equal.

Obviously, this view will change as people get married and if they truly love someone. It's counterintuitive and confusing to think about how the best way to love your girlfriend is to treat them less than how you would want to treat them. I can confirm that the conclusions this study makes are relevant to me and my current love life through my own experiences.

The law of the JUNGLE - a big red-pill thing is misogyny. I feel this misogyny is based on ignorance. A few things including the fair/just world hypothesis. That men and women should have equal opportunities when it comes to dating. What they forget is that it's been this way for a long time.

Red pills preach the biological determinism when it comes to mate selection, however, they don't realise that they have given themselves the answer. The law of the jungle has always been there. the strong survive while the weak don't. Those who fail to adapt will die/not get to pass on their genes to offspring. Become better if you want to get picked. If you're nerdy, 80-20 rule. 20% of the males do 80% of the reproduction. So just become the top 20%.

The relevance of this explanation is that once, I also believed in the just-world hypothesis when it came to dating. Which in turn caused lots of resentment towards women, because an average man genuinely does have fewer dating options compared to the average woman.

But once i realised that it was unfair all along, and that it was already meant to be unfair for men from the start, it helped me completely remove misogyny from my heart.

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To conclude, red pill has helped me have a more realistic view on relationships compared to the one the media sells about having equal and fair relationships. The damage of the media has caused me and probably many others to have unrealistic expectations of the "fairness" of a relationship. Resulting in larger gender divide and probably pushed people towards red-pill as a greater form of "truth" compared to the media.

TLDR:

Are there any more realistic/practical views towards relationships that may help me and are not simply moral arguments?

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I will answer questions.