My dating history 21M is a disaster, in my whole life i have not been able to create a romanic relationship with women, i have had some chances but they just did not get nowhere, except two, the first i turned away because she 17F (at that moment) was not virgin at the moment we were about to be partners, thing that make me regret because she is a real good girl and now five years later she is with other guy and they look very happy, dont misunderstandme i feel very good for her, because her parther is a really nice guy, and she looks healthierand happier than the time when i met her. The other girl 16F (at that moment )was one that i met at the university, we had a lot of thing in common and our conversations flew like river, i remember that i wanted the night pass fast to the other day just for seeing her again, one day she told me that she wanted me to kiss her, but at that moment i had realized that she is feminist and i dont want to have a feminist girlfriend, you know the false accusations and all the bad fame that feminism group has, make me reject his request of a romantic relationship, besides our friendship began to crumbing down and we did not set a contact but two years later we turned friends again but like the first story she already had a boyfriend and she was going to go to United States to work.

Later in the same university i met a girl 17F (at that moment) we got chemistry, and we began to get along and as time went by i began to fall in love with her and i became in her simp you know, i dont like remember this time of my life, because i was very stupid boy, and she took advantage of me, and put me in the friendzone and at the same time she gave me false hopes of a future romantic relationship, and i believed that, i began to realized that all were liars because my friends began to tell me who really was her with strong evidence, how she was taking advantage of me, and then i opened my eyes and i decided quit, something that they told me was that she was still meeting each other with her "former boyfriend" and they still fuck, and he treats her like shit and she even was cheated by him, after of these thing i decided quit and i stop of simping, she began to make me believe that she was pretty sad because me, but i just cant trust in her anymore, she took advantage of me in a lot of ways that im not going to say here because this post would be longer.

So the pandemic come and the lockdown began and i began to watch pick up artist and jp material, and that took me to the red pill and mgtow community, i dived deep down and i began to see the women like wicked psychopaths that just want to take advantage of the men, and how the system supports women and how it forgets men, i ate all the red pill and mgtow pamphlet you know (Alfas,betas, 80/20 rule, how 1548784% of marriages end up in divorce,hypergamy,women are hybridophilic, how they reject the nice guys and prefer the toxic guys) all these thing began to become myself in a anxiety bitter person and i began to feel rage every time i see a happy couple or a women, even i began to have negative feeling agains my own mother, all the manosphera speech was having sense for me because my last experience, and i began to post red pill, mgtow and antifeminist content every single day, even i had discussions with a feminist 19F (at that moment), despite im not agree she planted the seed of doubt on my mind,and i began to search and search more information, and i realized how easy is cheat hopeless people with this type of speech, mgtow and redpill are very similar a cult, and the more i search i realized that the reality is more complex and it has more branches that you think, after i made this i spit out black pill and red pill. Mgtow and red pill usually is full of desinformation, false stats,full of cherry picking, and exaggerated information and they just skip information which is not fix with their speech for convice their target who are lonely, hopeless, and sad men, which they use the facade of self-improvement to fill and make bigger this groups that become men in miserables, and poor bodies full of fear and misoginy that just dont see hope because mgtow and red pill taught them that the only way is follow their ideology.

Vulnerable souls needs someone who listen and understand their problems and when who listen are groups like these, the radicalization is in one step. im very happy that every time there are more healthy spaces to men show their problems without create hate radicalization and without make men miserables like the promoters of these ideology ( these promoters you even can see in their way of talk that they are not happy with their lifes), because every time i turn and i see them i can avoid feel bad for them, despite that there is a good new and these groups are turning smaller every time.

Men s problems need to be treated if we dont want a reborn or a rise up of this groups again.

and right now i have got over the most things of these ideologies, but i still got those voices in my head that every time im with a women make me think that she is horrible or something like that you know, but at least those voices are less louder than other times, and i know that one day i will be able to dating without start to thinking shit about women, Definitely this ideologies destroy the healthy relationships between women and men. My dream is being a father and have a family one day.