Just created this account to post this.

People, especially people on the internet will always tell you to focus on yourself, get hobbies, workout in order to become more attractive.But one thing they forget to mention is that you have to love what you're doing. It's true that these things increase your chances to find somebody that you'll attract and be attracted to. But in truth, attraction is all about connecting with another human being romantically or sexually or both. If you get new hobbies, new skills, if you try to keep yourself more social, put yourself out there and work on your physique just to get dates/sex than good luck to you, you might or might not attract somebody and even if you attract somebody it's probably related to something else than just your "attraction method" or "daily improvement program".

You workout, read, go out, learn new skills and get new hobbies, you do these things not because you'll be able to have lots of sex/dates but because you like doing these things. If you workout to get in shape because it'll make women love you then chances are you'll be really hurt when you can't seem to meet women and it will demotivate you more in the long run, you should be working out because it's healthy or because you like working out. Same applies for all the other things i mentioned. If you're an introvert who hates bars or crowded places but you go there to meet women then you won't like it and people will sense that you don't like it and you'll come off as weird, instead you should hang out on places you like.

And even then you might still not find anybody who will like you, there is no guarantee. You might be extremely good looking or have all the right things for you and you still can be lonely. But it's ok because you'll be doing the things you love and enjoy. This is called living your life. And sooner you accept this better it'll get for your well being.

If you're a man like me and you've been horribly unsuccessful with women then there's a good chance you have some emotional issues or you lack social skills and sometimes both. It's necessary to work on these things and you're not working on them by browsing reddit, reading theories and methods, reading the books of successful people or watching videos. you work on them by going to therapy, making plans, reading and applying self help methods, talking with your close friends and family, by actually working on them.

I know I somewhat stated the obvious and these things are easier said than done for me and for all people, I'm still working on myself. But at least I wanted to share and see what do you think. Thanks for reading.