Help? I’ll try and keep it brief, despite the incredibly juicy details. This experience hurt me more than anything imaginable, but objectively speaking, it could be a tv series. The drama is SO. GOOD. (We’ve most likely all been there.) I’m military. Met a guy at a training, and we fell fast and far in love. Dated three years. I changed my plans, (pickmeisha move but I didn’t really have anything lined up, was able to justify the move well outside of being with him, so I went for it.) we end up stationed together, (we thought we were so lucky because that’s rare) which means we work together. First year was a whirlwind, despite ignoring the fact he was a binge drinker, angry sports fanatic, judgmental to anyone different than him and had no real life experience outside college. He left for a 3 month training after our first year together, and wasn’t contacting me as often as he could have, despite me having multiple conversations about wanting a nightly phone call and laying out reasonable expectations. I wind up cheating by kissing someone else while intoxicated. Felt AWFUL, I’ve never cheated. Still absolutely hate that I did that to this day. Told him immediately after and offered to move out and end things. He stayed, despite being scorned and obviously angry. Fast forward another year. We deploy to Korea together. Things are falling apart but we are still in love. He starts blowing me off and making excuses while deployed. Our relationship became brittle and we broke up on thanksgiving. Spiraled into an on and off, toxic as you can imagine relationship. Gaslighting, manipulation, minimal effort, lying, you name it he did it. It’s time to come home, we are together and I think we are in the mend. (Dumb, i know.) I find out ON THE SEAT OF THE PLANE that he’s been sleeping with random Asian girls and talking to a secret stash of others that I had suspected over Instagram. He was supposed to meet me at the welcome home ceremony alongside my parents and brothers. How did I find out? A girl in Philly messaged me on Instagram and told me they matched on tinder. They’d been talking for a month, exchanging pics and things. She sent screenshots of their convos. We pinned timelines together and realize he was texting her while he was with me. Even sent selfies to her WHILE I WAS ASLEEP BEHIND HIM. I reached out to four or five other girls I had suspected he was talking to based off his followers, and confirmed my nightmares. They were supportive, horrified he’d been doing this, and honest. They shared screenshots as well. He’d been lying about working weekends to have sex with two girls for the past four months. Even split up Valentine’s Day to fuck other women! (BARRRRRFFFFFFF) He tried to deny everything and call me crazy when the other girls confronted him. Said I made up the screenshots and that he was trying to get a restraining order against me. (Wtf, so trashy. Just...no.) We STILL work together. I still have to exchange boxes with him because our storage unit had our boxes packed together. How should I handle my interactions with him? I’d like to come from a place of inner peace and forgiveness, not because he deserves it, but because when I walk away from this I don’t want to have regrets with the way I treated him. However, my mouth and emotions often get the best of me. HELP!!? How can I gain the upper hand and leave him in the dust regretting this for the rest of his life?