Hey all!

I'm new here, but it's very refreshing seeing a community of strong women who are unashamed of that fact. Glad to be here!

TL;DR: Any encouragements from ladies who have dealt with hurtful scenarios having to do with men who may have narcissistic personality disorder or bipolar disorder? i.e. lovebombing, devaluing, discarding scenarios / sudden manic episode leading to an abrupt breakup. Or just, you got fuckin played by a charmer and then suddenly got dumped like you didn't matter at all? Any advice for how to navigate healing from this situation?

So I had posted in some other forums about a really REALLY confusing breakup I just went through two nights ago. I was seeking some understanding of whether or not the abrupt change in behavior/character from the guy and his coldly breaking it off with me was due to an undiagnosed mental illness.

(Edit: I originally had the link to the OP here, but decided to delete it because it was turning into something pretty unproductive, for me and the community, and causing me a bit of anxiety. Sorry for the lack of context. If you want more details, I can disclose more in the comments.)

We women have really magnificent intuition about these sorts of things. Right before he suddenly broke it off, I knew something wasn't right. Something eerie and creepy... I felt like I was talking to another person all of a sudden (this was over text, mind you). But even through text, the vibe was so different from how it had been for the rest of our time together. Hence why I wondered if it was some sort of episode or break or trigger or whatever (he has family history of severe bipolar disorder, so I was like... shit maybe he has it too...). My friends brought up the possibility of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. And then another friend heard the story and asked me if I had any personal experience of someone with bipolar, I said no, and he told me that it sounded very similar to what happens with his friend's dad - loving, nurturing, wonderful father and husband, turning suddenly irritable, cold, short, mean, etc. So I took to Reddit to see if people could enlighten me. (My friend with a NPD ex loves the support, and mentioned it to me after hearing the spiel.)

Well I've been getting some backlash for my post and replies, and it's getting me down a little. I feel invalidated in my experience, unheard, unseen, misunderstood - you get it. Maybe I'm getting trolled by people who don't care all that much, when I was hoping to learn and grow. So that sucks.

Anyways, I am very aware of my worth, that my standards are not asking too much, and I'm working now to heartily move on from the situation. And very grateful the relationship was short-lived. However, I still feel hurt at the moment, and talking to people on the other forums is starting to make me feel like I did something wrong, that it was really my fault, when I'm pretty damn sure I didn't and it wasn't. Or that my situation isn't confusing and it's just simply that he didn't like me (even after three weeks of affection, compliments, admonishments about me and "us" together; of his being a perfect gentleman through and through and me thinking that would and should continue).

I have grown so much over the last couple years that this scenario is actually not affecting me like it would have a long time ago. I do reject his final definition of me that "caused" the breakup, because I know it is unfair and untrue. Nonetheless, things like this shake you up.

So, like I said, any encouragements from ladies who have dealt with similar scenarios as this? That were potential narcissistic personality disorder or bipolar disorder situations? Or just, you got fuckin played by a charmer for a month and then suddenly got dumped like you didn't matter at all? Any advice for how to navigate healing from this situation?

Thank you to all who took the time to read this!! <3