FDS and friends

extraacct1234 · 2020-02-02T16:22:59+00:00

There aren't a lot of women like this. I just tended to only have female friends that were single. And when they got a boyfriend they would disappear and I'd have to deal with their relationship drama when I got to see them. It was pickme bs but usually minimal unless dating a man.

Later I realized that they're a risk because I ended up taking advice/introductions from 2 of those women and that lead to both of my rapes. So... Pickmes as friends are a risk.

It's hard out there. Maybe find some women that are a little bit older and more established, women that have a career or are career-minded, focused on their education, serious about their life and their future. And vet them like you would a man, but for pickme tendencies.

Another thing that as you change you'll attract a different people. There are a lot of women out there that don't want to be friends with pickmes either. They will move away and filter out women that show pickme tendencies because they don't want any of that drama, bad advice, or the friend that disappears and forgets you exist as soon as she gets a boyfriend.

TheOGJammies · 2020-02-02T16:40:16+00:00

I know what you mean love but I think the key is to not give a fuck and feel how you feel regardless and lead by example.

Empower other women by empowering yourself.

Trust me when I say when people see you living your best life, They will want to be a part of it. You have to have confidence in your values, and since your values are based on self respect, they should be reflected in your words and actions.

Think about it this way - men think their thoughts and opinions are fact and that their boundaries and ideas are deserving of respect, no matter how goddamn stupid it is. You need to embody the self assuredness of a mediocre male.

Enough-Introduction · 2020-02-02T16:49:19+00:00

Not all friends have to tick all the boxes. I have friends I can laugh and party with, I have some that share my interests and with whom I‘ll do sports or discuss things, and others again who I will ask for advice. Some of my friends are pick mes, and that‘s okay, because so was I a while back. I just don‘t ask for their advice in relationship things, but they do ask me a lot and I helped some of them let go of their codependencies.

It will get lonely if you require everyone around you to be at the same exact spot in life that you are, and simply throw out everyone that hasn‘t reached the same knowledge that you have in one area. But you need to choose their roles in your life carefully, I agree.

quaintlyspoken · 2020-02-03T07:56:26+00:00

Pickmes don't make for good friends or good family members. Keeping them in your life is dangerous and inviting trouble. These types of women are not capable of giving you the type of reciprocation and support that is due in a healthy friendship.

There are a lot of comments saying that you shouldn't give these friends up for loneliness sake. They've still got a ways to go before they understand the fullness of Female Level Up Strategy. Those women will have their entire lives derailed in one way or another because they invited auch low value energy into their lives. Not to mention why make the path any more difficult for yourself? Pickmes will only bring you down.

As women we make so many concessions for low value behavior and the cycles of abuse in freindships, families and romantic relationships persist because of it.

You will find friends who are worthy of you. Make way for new and good things to come into your life.

SarcasmSlide · 2020-02-02T17:38:45+00:00

My best friend of 22 years is one of the worst Pickmeshas, if not THE worst, I’ve ever personally known. It’s frustrating and causes me to step back and focus on myself sometimes, but I also love her deeply. I try to help her whenever I can, including being bluntly honest about her fuckboy situationship.

She’s otherwise a great person and great friend. So I guess I don’t hold her internalized misogyny against her, though I’m always encouraging her to get therapy and work on her shit.

Enough-Introduction · 2020-02-02T16:49:26+00:00

Not all friends have to tick all the boxes. I have friends I can laugh and party with, I have some that share my interests and with whom I‘ll do sports or discuss things, and others again who I will ask for advice. Some of my friends are pick mes, and that‘s okay, because so was I a while back. I just don‘t ask for their advice in relationship things, but they do ask me a lot and I helped some of them let go of their codependencies.

It will get lonely if you require everyone around you to be at the same exact spot in life that you are, and simply throw out everyone that hasn‘t reached the same knowledge that you have in one area. But you need to choose their roles in your life carefully, I agree.

mermaid_jaws · 2020-02-02T18:47:18+00:00

Be careful not to get rid of good friends just because they behave in ways you wouldn’t at times.

Title	FDS and friends
Author	CarmaelSundae
Upvotes	22
Comments	14
Date	February 2, 2020 11:58 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/exngbo/fds_and_friends/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/fds-and-friends.683457 https://theredarchive.com/post/683457

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