FDS is a life savior - thank you | FemaleDatingStrategy

Hello, I'm 23 living in a religious country (afraid to say which region, best place EVEAAAAAAA) and I discovered FDS last December through a lauren chen video, which was equating this sub to hateful male subs with terrible advice more on that later

I was at a low, influenced by liberal fem ideas pick me advice about relationships, sex and "empowerment",I didn't understand the reason HVW acted the way they did and not being religious made me feel like it was unfair i was expected to "waste the best years of my life without sex" I had high drive, was lonely, insecure about my body and its flaws, thinking I was unworthy, so i made dumb choices to get validation, i never performed any act or kissed anyone I'm still virgin, i hate the whole doing stuff behind back, hide ect so there's that at least

after I felt awful, stupid, i had no real experience about dating, i never even had a bf only close calls so I had no idea how to act, what boundaries to stick to, i suck at being stubborn about that which is a weakness, how damaging the over-sexualisation culture is.. but then coming across FDS gave me all the answers to the questions that haunted me all my life and especially about the confusing situation I was in that did a number (no actual abuse but i was turning into something I didn't like) so i was like what the? these are great people not the hateful bitter women that youtuber framed you as

within my society, i wasn't a full on pick me, more like Medium value woman due to inexperience lol, I was even told "girl u're single cause u're too strong minded for most dudes looking for "passing time" " so that was reassuring at least, i didn't tolerate the abusive and controlling stuff most girls accepted like a bf controlling what u wear, where u go, excessive jealousy , short temper ect, and I was against accepting husband ordering me to stay at home and not work ect and I always made sure to advise my friends to expect better from their bfs

FDS, and through it discovering Why Men Love B** (I devoured in 2 days) helped me go to the next level and avoid terrible mistakes and corrected the libfem views i had like 50/50 sex expect an actual date ect, idk if i'm HV or not yet but i got stronger I got validation for my boundaries and encouragement to stick to them

Now I'm at peace, happy, working on myself mentally and physically, and most of all voluntarily single till i could manage to get away with my work to a better place, because the dating options are against me, the majority can't marry me, and the similar minority are NVM who play girls, endanger them by
asking for pics, having sex before marriage then leave (which can get a girl killed and makes her isolated from marriage) and looking for a decent unicorn out of them is like playing lottery with 50 numbers containing 3 digits, good luck winning, so it isn't worth the effort.

[–]purasangriaRuthless Strategist14 points15 points16 points 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

thank u, i prefer not to precise i'm already worried about the comments I made ect and reddit doesn't have "change name" option sadly

indeed, setting boundaries is tough for me, I want to be "nice" and "not too blunt" but I learned how to be firm about that, and pressuring or dismissing the risks "oh it's just a photo" is a red flag

and I didn't know about how deep metadata goes, only recently... it's scary, that's why I don't even post selfies

does uploading downloaded pics or screenshots do that too? like show device IP?

the most valuable lesson "anyone dismissing the risks for u, and asking u to put yourself in danger or uncomfortable situation to prove how much u "trust" them even if they didn't earn it is a big red flag and u should cut them off, anyone who doesn't even love u, but respects u wouldn't do that "

[–]amarnamoth2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]amarnamoth2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]MyplummmsRuthless Strategist3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 6 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

thank u ♥ oh trust me western women are like the reference, i'm not saing u have it good, just much better than most, and where religion rules women are gaslighted into accepting it as "god knows what's best and what he created, u are less intelligent, meant to submit and men can marri more women, that's merciful if u are sick or infertile , much better than ur husband leaving u right?"

even at mi lowest I believed that, I was kind of a feminist instinctively from when I was a child , I hated the injustice, and wished women would stop tearing each other down and unite to confront the abuse, stop accepting it, sadly in these places there's a kind of competition over who submits best and how pious that makes them, who does OCD level housework and best dishes, and shaming each other, feminism is demonised as being against religion, which is kind of true most activists are atheist, the word is stigmatized most women don't want to use it even if thei believe in women's rights, I think there needs to be a moderate m.... kinda feminism to make women more comfortable, then over time there would be more freedom to delve deeper

[–]MyplummmsRuthless Strategist9 points10 points11 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I know, I'm seeing how bad it is for u as well i see what is going on, it was just to sai, u have it less worse I guess, tbh I shouldn't even have said that it's not a competition, sadly the bar for women's rights is low we think being mistreated less is good, but well things will move forward hopefully

I absolutely agree, that's why i'm such a rad fem fan, putting women first no religion or culture relativism or sex positivism and t... issues above women unlike other parts contributing to that, I'm forever grateful because I was on a destructive path, i don't like discussing it it kind of "triggers" me into anxiety which I battle reflecting on that...

I know, men on both ends are like "western women have too many rights as it is", except few, many, esp on the right, only speak of mistreatment of women elsewhere or by minorities as "u have it good here, don't resist how we oppress u"

men don't appreciate effort done for them, submissiveness won't get appreciation but exploitation, they don't appreciate it like we would, the more women learn this and teach this and fight against romance giving men all the tools to manipulate us while misleading us about how men think (they don't love like us, they see us a someone to trick into having sex with and serve) the closer we'll get to improvement

i really love speaking with u , this feels like home

[–]MyplummmsRuthless Strategist5 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

indeed, I recognize this, women are treated as if thei must marri as soon as possible, sometimes barely in high school and think that is good, the "old traditions" ect, and we are pressured into getting ani man cause he is a male, that's all that matters, having those genitals, he can be alcoholic, porn addict, ruined mani girls lives, still live with his parents in a small apartment but all is insignificant he will "cover" u from the "shame" of being unmarried while women are held to impossible standards in beauti and "past" and expected to submit and tolerate abuse from all his household and allow him to get his wai otherwise u are being a bad wife don't listen to them, even here things are changing,be strong and focus on career, once u acheive a sort of financial independence only then do u consider marriage, and to an open minded moderate dude who knows how to be respectful, and if u want raise a better generation of children with better mindset, we are the future

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I really sympathies with u, muslim women deserve so much better than this, and this behavior is what set the bar so low tbh 75% of the population is unfit for relationships altogether let alone raise kids with all the abuse no one acknowledges and just repeats on new generations and whi men get worse and worse esp with social media, and how thei expect more out of women

it doesn't make u bad, in islam's time women were treated better considering that time, divorce wasn't such a taboo, men weren't obsessed with a membrane, housework for his fam wasn't a requirement, she'd have her own home, her own maids, he'd provide for them while she looks good and takes care of small stuff, people were less intolerant kinda believers... so even in islam's view it makes sense to be reluctant when most are not up for a 5% of this

now hypocrisy and double standards prevail, it's logical and smart to vet for a HVM or none esp with how divorce is viewed, with all respect it's irresponsible of them to push u into a marriage blind not caring for ur safety and all that could go wrong, we wake up to news of the consequences for other unfortunate women daily, and as i said our LVM are experts at deception i don't even think FDS could spot all of them so it's gambling

But I wish the best for u, use twitter and fb to speak of issues and add friends with things in common, look for moderate secular muslims who don't bring up religion too much, esp of what is expected of women, u know, excessive religiosity can be compensation not faith so don't be fooled it is not a reference, see what his opinions are on feminism and western stuff, don't hint at what ur opinions are let him express his, if u find him open minded enough it's a good sign, then FDs advice take over and hope for it to work.

[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

oh wanna spend the night ranting about all that is wrong about that ? turning FDs into that society criticism lol those people are ev*l, hypocrites who ruined all of MENA with their propaganda, most of those were secular till u know what place funded brainwashing and countries being into arab supremacy just made things easier for foreigners to brainwash people who think thei aren't muslim enough and the east has all the answers, add to that nilesat and voila, society rotten to the core with those preaches.. but to be fair sexism sometimes exceeded religion, it just enabled it and the same preachers, and their wives live in extreme wealth in foreign countries not applying a single word thei preach or living through the abuse thei call for those societies need a serious cultural and religious reform, promoting moderate islam for more peace and focus on what matters, not superficial religious stuff done to gain approval

[–]deepfreshwater1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]NinoEminesFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]LateNightLattes01FDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[+][deleted] 6 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

indeed, she really thought she was making a point and advocating the classic 50/50, communication '"nice girl" stuff unlike "those other toxic insufferable women"ect, I was the nice girl and it got me nothing, so I knew her advice was not helpful, if she isn't reliable, is she reliable to tell me what is good or not? while I found empowerment HERE, i was born again, finalli getting advice that made sense and explained what I always noticed about women being successful, who make their own game not fall for men's

https://youtu.be/YjK216nbRd8?list=TLPQMDQwNzIwMjBT3oAdnfKvmA either naive or purposefully acting like she doesn't know how the odds are against women, so putting women first evens the odds and turns it into mutually beneficial, the things she ignores is that women give more unappreciated work, emotionally, caring, entertaining ect and she doesn't acknowledge that men enter relationships to exploit us at maximum, so it is only fair to avoid letting it work... oh and "we hate men" please, it's abusive people who are hated not HV but who cares, let's please conservative dudes she's a big example of bashing on feminism, on fds for the sake of it on surface level, the last vid proves how biased se is, feminist subs are bein banned and all se has to talk about is "feminist subs bad" come on , not taking her seriously was the best thing I did.

Title	FDS is a life savior - thank you
Author	NinoEmines
Upvotes	102
Comments	24
Date	July 3, 2020 11:21 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hkt5nb/fds_is_a_life_savior_thank_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/fds-is-a-life-savior-thank-you.703160 https://theredarchive.com/post/703160

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