I am so thankful I found this sub. I've recently become the victim of a man who employed redpill strategies on me, at a very vulnerable time in my life (post divorce). He posed as a very warm and caring friend, concerned about my well being during the whole time of separation through divorce. I was very confused when later on he treated me very badly (only wanting to hang out, making sure I knew he was seeing other people). I only saw him a couple of times but it was enough to see that he had no respect for me and just wanted a situation where he could use me.
The ex was my first and only relationship that lasted 14 years. I still have so much to unpack from that one but I basically lived the life of a pick me penelope to a very low value man.
I'm looking at all the posts and comments and my eyes have been opened. Thank you ladies. I've been seriously at a loss as to why men treated me badly when I gave so much of my self. This all explains it. They don't respect you if you don't start respecting yourself. Nobody ever really arms women with this knowledge. I come from a very traditional asian culture, a very male dominated "please the man" culture, women are viewed as a second class citizen.
Needless to say it's been a process.
But one of the things I am going through right now is going through mistakes. Having these regrets. 'I should've' or 'I never should've' 'I can't believe I was so stupid to do that.' And I find myself lying awake thinking of these past situations. I'm trying to pull myself out of it but all I can do is beat myself up and feel anger at these shitty men.
How do you move on from the past relationships/mistakes after having your eyes opened?
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"Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.β β MayaAngelou
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