How do you heal abandonment issues and prevent it from making you clingy in life? Success stories?

ghygdryhchmmmmjj · 2020-03-02T15:37:30+00:00

Therapy. Because no amount of self soothing will look in the eyes and tell you that you need to change your actions and be held accountable. I had a sociopath experience and due that, wondering how he was able to weasel into my life I realized as nice as I was I needed work in other areas.trauma therapy was amazing.

shade_of_ara · 2020-03-02T18:53:49+00:00

Therapists are valuable, but the most important thing I've seen for the most people has been finding not one, but three sources of support:

1 - The friends who don't even know about your issues and only get to see you at your best. These are your acquaintances or broader community that you have good times with but don't feel the need to open up to. These people remind you how the world responds to your best self.

But if you focus too hard on this group, you won't feel seen or supported.

2 - The peers who are going through the same struggles as you are. We all need people who "get it" and are in the trenches fighting with us against the same demons.

But if you focus too hard on this group, you might get caught up in wallowing, or validating each other's toxic coping mechanisms.

3 - The therapists and other mentors who have already gotten through it, either for themselves or with their clients, who we encounter both in person and through their content work. They give us hope and teach us to use new tools.

But if you focus too hard on this group, you might end up feeling isolated and not-good-enough because you're not already there.

To best support you in your healing, you need community to lift you up and remind you your struggles aren't your identity, peers to give you companionship on that road, and mentors to give you hope and light the way.

All three of them work together, and need each other to do their best in supporting us.

Calm_Link · 2020-03-02T16:42:57+00:00

Talk to everyone but only hang out with those that make the effort. They are out their. Go on friend apps or chats. Their may be some that abandon you in life but their are also those that would do almost anything for you being as amazing you are. Start focusing on those ones.

Kekekeke7777 · 2020-03-02T15:36:57+00:00

How do you like hypnosis so far?

I’m in therapy too.

2020-03-02T21:25:13+00:00

[deleted]

Maisiebr · 2020-03-02T17:01:47+00:00

Schema therapy combined with CBT has been great for me.

Title	How do you heal abandonment issues and prevent it from making you clingy in life? Success stories?
Author	heyheym1ckey
Upvotes	38
Comments	11
Date	March 2, 2020 2:13 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fccmc3/how_do_you_heal_abandonment_issues_and_prevent_it/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/how-do-you-heal-abandonment-issues-and-prevent-it.681123 https://theredarchive.com/post/681123

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