How to protect yourself when young? (18-24)

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-03-25T03:53:59+00:00

Read our handbook. Also read some of the books that we recommend like why does he do that? and the gift of fear, among others.

Learn about red flags, manipulation, gaslighting, bread crumbing, love bombing etc.

Build up your self-esteem and healthy boundaries.

And this is very important, always have your own life, your own friends, your own money, your own job, your own goals, hobbies, dreams and plans. Be busy with life.

edelbiatch · 2021-03-25T08:41:59+00:00

Ignore his words and listen to his actions only. If you like what you see, proceed. If he uses his words to sugarcoat boundary stomping, disrespect or other bullshit, block and delete. And don't waste time explaining why this thing they did hurt you. They know and they don't care.

Don't make up excuses for men. If he apologizes, be critical. But if he doesn't, it's not your responsibility to come up with excuses for him à la "He doesn't know any better", "He's young and immature", "He was just hurt by xyz". If he fucks up, it's his responsibility to apologize and you only accept an apology if he changes his behavior afterwards.

Most men who prey on young women do it because they assume you are naive. Once you show them that this is not the case they will quickly move on to another victim. The fact that you are asking such questions shows me that you are not naive at all.

The most important thing for your protection however is your self confidence. Having a stable sense of worth can protect you from anyone who will use you. If you believe that you deserve being treated like a queen, you will walk away if your standards aren't met. Manipulative NVM might still hover over you trying to catch you in a moment of weakness but they will give up eventually. Remind yourself that a HVM will support you in anything that makes YOU happy bc he likes seeing you happy, even if it's not for his direct benefit. He will encourage you to pick up that new hobby or take that amazing job opportunity, even if this means you are less available for him.

Sisi21cent · 2021-03-28T01:45:44+00:00

I never date till I was 25. It was mostly a choice. Plus I had my education going on. For awhile I thought I was missing something. Now, I’m sure it was god’s protection and I’m not even religious! Young men are beyond immature. Old men are disgusting. Don’t give them your time. After getting your things together start dating men your age.

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