Is anyone else exhausted?

Unlikely-Marzipan · 2020-07-04T19:00:42+00:00

[deleted]

sadcello · 2020-07-04T18:53:18+00:00

Advices are just advices, they don't work for everyone. You're not suppose to do everything, you're supposed to take the main messages and then do what works for you. Practice critical thinking.

For me, the main message of FDS is you're good enough, you're worth so much more than you can possibly imagine. The whole humanity will be wiped out if all women choose to abandon marriage and motherhood all together, women are that powerful. You don't have to sacrifice yourself to be guy's wet dream, have more dignity than that. If you want to be with a man, make sure he's worth it for you. How do you tell if a man is worth it for you? You decide. Not dating is okay, there's nothing wrong being single, it might even be the smartest choice right now.

We can't all vet men the same way because fuckboys are learning too. So you have to develop your own vetting strategy by knowing who you are, what you want, and what are you willing to risk/sacrifice. You also need to know who men are, what they say they want vs what they really want and what they're willing and unwilling to risk/sacrifice for. Basically know yourself and your enemy and you can win any war.

FDS can only help giving you all the informations you need, it can't decide all your life's choices for you. I myself disagree with a lot of FDS strategy, but I get what they're trying to say.

For me wait x month before sex is rubbish, I won't have sex until marriage. I'm not thirsty and if a man gonna make me wait for years for marriage, he's going to wait for the same years for sex. Equality. But I know other women won't or can't do this and that's okay, as long as they know the risks of having sex too early and make a decision while keeping that in mind.

I agree all men will cheat given the choice, unless they're afraid of losing the woman because she doesn't tolerate cheating. If you have strong boundaries, your man have no choice but to respect it if he wants to be with you. That's it, so don't bother trying to keep him or trying to make him loves you, it's useless. Never depend on a man for survival, that is the core message. Focus instead on yourself, so if a guy cheats, he's gone. You can drop him like a hot potato and you'll be sad for a while but it won't have an impact on your life.

By default women are already seen as losers, as second class citizen anyway. Having a man doesn't make you a winner, at worst it makes you a miserable slave, at best, I don't know, up to each person I guess. Why should you be afraid of being seen as 'losers' just because you're single while the real losers are pickmeisha who sacrifice everything for a below average penis who abuse her physically, emotionally and financially?

I think you still don't know who you are and what you want. Figure those out first before dating anyone.

raiu86 · 2020-07-04T19:35:34+00:00

Part of the reason for the seemingly contradictory advice is that while any woman can do FDS the goal is really to become the queen you've always been. Once you find your value you won't need rules, your standards and boundaries will come naturally and be what you need.

Example: FDS recommends waiting >3mo before bedding a man so that you can vet him without becoming "dickmatized". But me, I'm more like a man in the sense that I see the guy more clearly after sex (I've heard guys call it post nut clarity), so sex on 3-5th date was better for me. No point getting attached or wasting time on a guy who will be a selfish lover or drop all effort after one fuck.

Howslap · 2020-07-04T18:27:34+00:00

Awwww....bless you. It all seems overwhelming because low key it kind of IS overwhelming. Especially when you've been taken advantage of and used by LVM along the way. This exhaustion that you feel? Well it's a big sign that you need to take a break from dating entirely and focus on yourself. Date yourself, get to know yourself, take yourself out, spend on yourself, level yourself up. I honestly believe that FDS is about making yourself a HVW so that ultimately you are always happy with your own company. Once you get to that point you can date without feeling so much anxiety. If at any point you feel burnt out and it's all feeling futile like it is now. It means that you have to shift lanes from dating to self-care . Don't worry we've all been here, and most of us more than once. Take care of yourself, love yourself sis. HVM DO exist but it requires patience to find one. And it sounds like your tank of patience is low at the moment 😂 (I know the signs because I've been where you are sis). Sending hugs and love queen! ❤🤗

jjlew922 · 2020-07-04T19:43:58+00:00

AllI gotta say is....oh my, I feel you!!! Seriously summed up typical situations in dating as we all love and learn. You’re equipped with the knowledge and strength now, you’ll know when the right one comes along so trust that and evermore trust it because you’ve experienced the opposite and you know how that feels. If it feels familiar, reassess (and damn is it exhausting I hear you, I can relate to so much of your post it’s baffling!). I’m on a break from dating right now and working on myself, you’re not a loser for wanting to do that and you certainly don’t appear to have any issues with making decisions as you’ve walked away from the men who hurt you in the past. You’ve got this!! 💯❤️

Title	Is anyone else exhausted?
Author	Unlikely-Marzipan
Upvotes	40
Comments	16
Date	July 4, 2020 12:46 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hl2rl1/is_anyone_else_exhausted/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/is-anyone-else-exhausted.704199 https://theredarchive.com/post/704199

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