As I wait to get my life together and get out, I had some time alone this weekend (see post history), and while my LVBF and I had been texting, it was sporadic. I often acted uninterested when we talked and kept it short. By the end of yesterday afternoon, he hadn’t texted me back in about 2 hours, so I shut my phone off and just went to bed. I told myself I didn’t deserve to be sitting up in this apartment anxious about him and god knows who while he does whatever he wants while he’s away.

I ate dinner, finished up some work, took a bubble bath and two melatonin and knocked out. I feel good about choosing myself. Every time I thought to go turn my phone back on I asked myself “do you feel like being upset?” And each time I said “no.” So small, but sure steps being taken here. I feel proud of me.