Thinking about my old PickMe/CoolGirl habits and cringing til dawn. 🤦‍♀️

I'm waaaay better now since discovery FDS, but my goodness! I was sooooo baaad. It got to the point where I actually let myself get verbally abused on a daily basis, then going out and actually acting like everything was perfect.

I do think it came from all the women in my family who are all PickMe's. My mother being one of the worst ones. Now that I'm here, I see that she takes so much verbal abuse from my father, and she just sits there and does nothing. And I did the same thing! Cultural conditioning is so real, and it's so damaging to anyone's self esteem. To be told that you HAVE TO please your man and just take whatever they hand you. Like wtf?! NO. I've been told time and time again by my mother, aunties and cousins that you need to look good so you can find a good man, you need to act in a certain way and you need to blah blah blah. Even yesterday, my own mother TOLD ME I NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT to be more attractive for the right man. The eyeroll is hard.

But honestly, you gals are amazing and all the posts have helped me know that I am worth more than what I was taught.