What should I watch out for?

HubertPhil · 2020-03-26T17:34:50+00:00

I'm 19, so maybe I don't have the best insight, but I would say to hold off on dating at this age. However, if you're going to date, I would watch out for guys who show signs of narcissism because those are the guys who think they're greater than everyone and will definitely only be looking to date to boost their own confidence and to feel like they have power over someone. These are the kind of men that will hold your inexperience against you likely because of their own ego.

blucowz · 2020-03-26T19:22:19+00:00

Eagerness to get you into a relationship too fast, telling you he loves you too soon, saying disrespectful things in a subtle way. Walk away from the first sign of disrespect. Predatory guys will purposely do little disrespectful things to test your boundaries to see how much abuse you will put up with.

My first relationship I was very young and naive and I dated a guy who was much older than me. Tbh he wasn’t even attractive. He was 5’6 and kind of a loser(smoked weed every day and lived with roommates) but I was a really insecure pickmeisha then. A lot of guys hit on me and he knew this since we worked at the same place and guys would always be creepy and talk about how hot I am and what they wanted to do to me to other guys. I know this because they were not discreet at all. But I liked him because he would always stop by and make conversation and ask me about my day and basically treat me like a human. Before quitting his job he asked me on a date. I accepted since I liked him. On the first date he asked me to be his girlfriend(first red flag). I accepted. So we have a couple more dates and they were really low effort dates which would lead us to coming back to his place and watching Netflix. While laying on the couch he would try to touch me and get me to have sex with him which I rejected and told him I wanted to get to know him more. I was a virgin. He would try to guilt trip me and say how I gave him blue balls which is unhealthy for guys and that I’m such a tease(red flag 2). He said it as a joke but still felt bad though. Eventually I gave in to having sex with him because I felt bad; he took me on a lot of dates and did buy me expensive gifts which was the only HV trait of his. The first time we had sex he tried to persuade me to not use condoms and when I said no he would try to guilt trip me (red flag 3). After one month of dating he tells me he loves me over text(red flag 4). So we have this thing going on for a few months where he would take me on a low effort date and then go back to his place for sex. So he starts to get comfortable since he has me now and that’s when he starts laying out the emotional abuse. Not even going to go into that tbh since it hurts to even think/talk about it. So fast forward a couple months later, he got what he wanted from me and discards me. I bet he thought he was hot shit since I was hot and gave him a chance. It felt like karmic revenge when I saw him on Facebook the other day still working a dead end minimum wage job reaching his 30s and still single.

But yeah, If I had walked away from the first red flag I wouldn’t have went through all this trauma. After this relationship ended it’s like a part of me died inside and it took a long time to regain what I lost. Save yourself from all the hurt by not doing what I did.

girlWproblemz · 2020-03-26T17:59:24+00:00

Require full panel testing. Always.

GlamorKiss · 2020-03-26T17:31:49+00:00

I’m a few years older than you and also have very limited dating experience and would like to know how guys would take advantage of a girl who hasn’t dated someone yet.

Basically I’d just say if you see any red flags/ you think he’s being mean to you take the first warning sign to leave. Everytime I haven’t left after a warning sign or one bad incident, it ends up worse and leaving me with emotional scars.

I would say don’t be all alone with a boy in a park, somewhere dark, alone in a room, etc as I’ve had friends end up in potentially bad situations like this. I’ve had 2 different friends be pressured/the guy tried to force her to do something when they were alone so that’s why I say this. Don’t let him drive you to the first few dates until you trust him. That’s for women of any age.

_tinyimp · 2020-03-27T06:26:40+00:00

I’m 21 and regret every relationship and sexual encounter I’ve had except for my current bf, who is 25 and so far a HVM. 21 year old men are not that different from 18 year old men except now they’re wasting money on alcohol AND weed.

These are things I watch out for/basically deal breakers and I consider LVM: No smoking, can barely handle their finances when it comes to weed much less make a grilled cheese with their adulting skills. If they interrupt you frequently, don’t waste your time, it will literally NEVER stop. If they claim the condom ‘hurts’ or ‘is uncomfortable’ they’re being babies and just tell them you’re not on BC or leave. Must have a job....This sounds stupid but yes, I’ve put up with jobless LVM who are 21. Watch out for how they talk about their exes. Even though we aren’t supposed to share our FDS knowledge, don’t hesitate to bring up things you care about with feminist issues etc. their reactions will give everything away (: Watch what they mock you about. It might all be fun and games at first teasing but I’ve had multiple men admit their tactics to purposely make me feel bad about small things and it really breaks you down. Like I had zero confidence in my hobbies or anything. Also check who they’re following on Instagram. Pornsick idiots forget its public knowledge who they’re following I guess?

Title	What should I watch out for?
Author	Awkward_Mouse
Upvotes	21
Comments	8
Date	March 26, 2020 12:08 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fpaez6/what_should_i_watch_out_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/what-should-i-watch-out-for.679550 https://theredarchive.com/post/679550

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