After getting old

MrNeverDryDick · 2020-11-14T17:53:01+00:00

Ok so what if you’re with someone and THEN something happens and on top of life shitting on you, that person leaves you? Double whammy.

Happens all the time. People get injured and debilitated and their partner doesn’t want any of it. Now not only did you get dealt a bad hand you’re now more distraught because you put all your trust into a fickle person and it was shattered.

I see people who are married and I admit, there’s some really good ones. At least from my perspective. But the vast majority are situations I’d loathe to be in. I see a lot of men becoming unhealthy and out of shape because the wife can’t cook for shit or she complains he spends too much time at the gym. Not saying that’s ever an excuse but these dudes fall victim to their women monopolizing their time because they feel it’s the “right thing to do.” Then they suffer the consequences later in life when their unhealthy habits catch up to them.

In fact I can list a ton of people who keep saying “man I’d love to travel and see the world” and when asked why not they say they can’t because the wife wouldn’t let them. Imagine being a grown ass man and needing permission to do some shit like that. Then by the time they actually can travel they’re too old to do so. So they get to look back with regret.

I see a lot of older people. Close to death or dying. More often than not, they’re alone. Could’ve been married for decades. But in the end, it’s just them. So you need to make friends with yourself. You better be happy with that person

burnett-lignon · 2020-11-14T18:45:09+00:00

I am 70 years old and know that I will die alone and without a companion. I'm in good health, live alone on a small farm 6 miles from the nearest town and 30 miles from the closest small rural hospital. My MGTOW life has been satisfying and happy for over 30 years. I don't fear dying by myself, but I dread declining physical health that will make me dependent on being cared for by others. I stay physically and socially active and am still mostly self sufficient; I hire help for some jobs like vaccinating livestock, loading hay, painting and some maintenance but know I'm likely to need more help in the future. Thanks to MGTOW living, I can afford to pay for help when I need it. My end game is to live in my own home until it's undeniably not possible, which requires healthy living and avoiding risky situations, like ladders. I hope to die in my tracks at home, but am resigned to make the best of the situation if I have to be in a nursing home.

IBudgetForIt · 2020-11-14T19:12:32+00:00

What you need to consider is that you are talking about a success story. It is easy for an old couple to say "look at the benefits we have in our old age" and for you to be somewhat convinced.

The thing is that you're NOT hearing from the many failed couples where the man is now so much worse off for having poured resources into FAILED attempts and alone in a much more dire situation than the one he would be in if he had conserved and consolidated his resources.

So now let us ask the guy who is alone with a background in failed attempts and expended resources. What happens to HIM if he in his old age breaks a leg and would be in need of some help? Would he not be worse off than if he had more resources to bring to bear?

Those lost resources could be more friends(time spent on women, is time removed from building friendships). Could be more money. Could be better health(greatly reducing the toll of a broken leg, perhaps it wouldn't even occur).

Putting it another way, say if I were a lottery winner. Is it a convincing argument for me to go "you should consider becoming a lottery winner like me, remember in your old age you might need that money" when the odds of you winning are pretty slim?

Think about the men you're not hearing from. Perhaps the 70% of homeless who are men. Ever stopped and considered the background of that old homeless man who sleeps on the park bench? The road to be in his shoes starts somewhere. Wouldn't want to be him and break a leg. If you aren't careful enough then you could become him.

MGTOWch · 2020-11-14T18:13:17+00:00

You die alone. In the hospital, with people around you, you still die alone. You suffer alone, and nobody can take that pain away.

Imagine this : you are old, 90 years, with a loving family, you are stuck in the hospital because you can’t live by yourself and your family can’t help you all day because even waking up in the morning is too dangerous for you, so you are stuck in the hospital for your own security for your last days/months/years to come.

You are dying because you are old. Your family come every time they can to see you, but you are old and dying, they can’t do anything to remove the pain associated with being old and slowly dying.

Having someone by your side doesn’t protect you from this end, because that’s the most happiest ending you can achieve : dying in a hospital, taken care by good staff and a loving family who visit you when they can. When you think about it, it’s really one the best ending you can achieve.

Someone of my family is dying right now, and being in a couple doesn’t save her from dying alone.

And the fun part is, it’s tiring to see people when you are in this kind of end life situation. Having your old mate might even be some pain in the ass, shit you don’t want to manage in this situation, trust me.

I hope to die alone, with nobody to suffer from me leaving this planet.

AK9029 · 2020-11-14T23:28:34+00:00

Absolutely everything in life is temporary. EVERYTHING. The only guarantee you have is that it will all come to an end someday whether you want it to or not. People will come in your life and people will go. Once you can accept that everything is temporary, you can then begin appreciating it for what it is and being grateful while you have it but once its gone, let it go. All suffering is born from our desires not being met. If you let go of your desires, you can end suffering. Trying to secure/lock down a ride or die partner for the rest of your life is only going to cause you suffering because they might leave, die, whatever set of circumstances may arise, etc. Appreciate you friends, appreciate your family. Go out and live your life because your happiness is dependent on no one.

josper11 · 2020-11-14T23:41:50+00:00

your parents' mistake is to think that the values they professed and the social standards of the time they married are still applicable to today's society.

Individualism, consumism, instant gratification, etc.. These are the "values" that society promotes today and are contrary to traditional family life. It is foolish to preach in favor of an institution (marriage) whose foundations ceased to exist 20 years ago.

what will happen when we are old? IMO most of us will grow old and die alone, if you accumulated capital in your youth you will be able to afford an institution that takes care of you and offers you a good life quality, if you didnt, well... Your old age will not be pretty.

I think that this is an inevitable reality that you have to accept and for which you have to prepare.

DevilComeKnockin · 2020-11-15T07:40:07+00:00

I'm "alone" right now at 45. I was married once, but that ended in divorce. A few years later I shacked up with my oldest childhood friend, who ended up being a con-artist. She frequently mentioned "dying alone in old-age" just to keep me there. Once I fled that situation, I was homeless and starving for 3 years. And this was while employed full-time. I got injured at work and had to move into a camper on my father's land. And there I discovered MGTOW.

I now have my own stable, secure place with a hot water heater and everything (try going 1.5 years without it!) and my question to you is: "How precisely did marriage stop this?"

It didn't. In many ways, it contributed to it. I wouldn't have been homeless if I hadn't moved in with the psycho gold-digger. I was very comfortable in my life (and yes, a little lonely) prior to that. But being alone in a nice apartment with money and food was far preferable to living out of a vehicle and boiling water for baths!

Marriage and cohabitation did absolutely nothing to prevent those things from happening. Maybe you'll get lucky, and everything will turn out great. Or maybe you'll end up shitting in the woods like I did.

Or maybe you'll avoid all that, by living beneath your means and not sticking your neck out for a woman. I sure as hell intend to now.

rbep531 · 2020-11-14T18:02:00+00:00

There's no use on relying on anybody else for anything. Any number of things can happen. The wife could divorce you, die, or just plain not be able to take care of you. A million different things could happen to your kids. You might not make it to old age.

Doing everything the way society tells you to do it has ended up in failure for so many people.

dachengchuan · 2020-11-14T21:22:30+00:00

No woman will stay with an invalid man. They leave as soon there is nothing to steal. Make real friends, MEN !!! THEY will help you. Period

babayagajonwick · 2020-11-14T18:38:00+00:00

What happens is you sit with the person and don’t talk. You go out to a restaurant and don’t even speak. Might as well be alone at that point

SatyaNi · 2020-11-14T20:56:20+00:00

I don't now of any relatonsih that survived a huge setback for the male part (being laid off, being crippled, serious illness). The catastrofic event befalling the male was never the said cause of the separation, yet... there was a separation.

In all fairness, I don't know of the reverse : the woman suffering an ill fate. So may be the same sequence of event would occured.

My point is, there were 2 legit reasons a male and a female should paired themeself, and that is :

- Raising children

- To face the harshness of life.

- Well, nowadays the children are not raised withing the familly, but by the government (day care/ school/ educational program)

- Life is not harsh anymore (not in the way it used to be (nobody risk starvation, state police protect the weak from physical danger, household appliances make it easier to maintain a home, etc.)

Men and women are not bound together because of need and adversity anymore, and when you soustract the firts couple years of passion, what is there that make it worth to stay. Especially for women who can have sex very easily and are not that drive towards it anyway ?

DonMelbourne · 2020-11-15T01:17:35+00:00

Can anyone enlighten me on this.

If you have a look at the statistics, young people tend to be lonelier than older people. This from a Jan 2020 article:

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/01/23/798676465/most-americans-are-lonely-and-our-workplace-culture-may-not-be-helping

Loneliness appeared to be more common among men. The survey found 63% of men to be lonely, compared with 58% of women. ...

Social media use was tied to loneliness as well, with 73% of very heavy social media users considered lonely, as compared with 52% of light users. ...

But feelings of isolation were prevalent across generations. Gen Z — people who were 18 to 22 years old when surveyed — had the highest average loneliness score on the 80-point scale (about 50), and boomers had the lowest (about 43). ...

So boomers are less lonely than younger people, though whether that is related to marriage or not isn't stated.

More than three-quarters of survey respondents had close relationships that bring them emotional security and well-being. And respondents without such relationships had a loneliness score of 57 out of 80, almost 15 points higher than those with them.

"Close relationships" aren't defined with regards to marriage and children, so I don't know if that is part of the equation. Does anyone have any good statistics about loneliness for older single males vs older married males? For all we know, getting older while being single might result in less loneliness. I'd love to see the evidence either way.

At the end of the day, I suspect that close relationships are very important to minimize loneliness. That includes friends and close acquaintances. That's why I always recommend that men invest time into friendships, regardless of whether they are married or single. Trying to make a friend is a horrible reason to get married.

VestigialHead · 2020-11-15T04:52:28+00:00

This is where you need to set yourself up pretty well for your future. As MGTOW you are in a MUCH better position to save or make a lot of money.

So get your future sorted out financially and if you end up in said position you can pay for a nurse or a unit in a good retirement village that have care.

cleats4u · 2020-11-15T13:20:09+00:00

I can just picture myself laying in a hospital bed dying. Some old lady peeks her head over my rail and says...are you sure you haven't got any more assets I should know about? No bitch! I spent them on hookers, cigars and bourbon!

Gaiinahat · 2020-11-16T04:21:18+00:00

When I'm old and frail, I'll just hire a nurse to take care of me, a maid to clean the house, a cook to make my meals, a driver to take me places, all with the millions of dollars I didn't throw away on a woman who left me with only a few bucks in my pocket.

RedPilledWorld · 2020-11-15T01:36:52+00:00

Your parents are from a different time when relationships weren’t purely transactional. Nowadays, more often than not, women will leave their partner if something bad happens to them, eg. getting sick, disabled, chronic illness or losing their source of income. Even now during the pandemic, many people are dying alone in hospitals as their family couldn’t see them. So what difference does it really make in the end?

It’s better to be alone than to be stuck in a relationship that makes you feel lonely. That way, at least you’ve lived a happy life enjoying your freedom rather than feel miserable for most of your life hoping that in those last few years, someone you love will take care of you and not leave you for someone ‘better’, taking away most of your money and assets in the process.

whyserenity · 2020-11-15T03:12:13+00:00

She won’t be there for you in 7 years, of course she won’t be there when you are old.

jakethegreatwhite · 2020-11-15T04:20:43+00:00

Spend your money on the best senior care in the world

SPI-MGTOW · 2020-11-17T17:07:23+00:00

A. Virtually everyone dies alone. If you are married, chances are, both of you won't die at the same time - and if you do, neither can attend to the other. So someone is left dying alone.

B. If you can't trust a woman to be faithful to you if you lose your job or get depressed or hurt, you sure as heck can't expect for her to stay and play nurse to you.

C. Just get long-term disability insurance and in-home care insurance when you are older.

Title	After getting old
Author	AK9029
Upvotes	1
Comments	58
Date	November 14, 2020 5:39 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW2
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW2/comments/ju5sgp/after_getting_old/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW2/after-getting-old.804282 https://theredarchive.com/post/804282

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