Hey there.

Sadbeary · 2015-09-02T02:53:06+00:00

Maybe because she has filled her feminine role but you've yet to fill your Masculine one?

marriedwithchitluns · 2015-09-02T03:14:16+00:00

You lucky fucker, you. Your woman hand delivers you a written invitation to be the Dominant Alpha Male (TM) that she's always fantasized about, and communicates her intentions through her actions.

Is that what you want? Yes?

Now, it's your turn. The role she's overtly asked you to fill is not an overnight transformation, but a lifelong journey of self-improvement and leadership. Start with the sidebar. Then move on to the books. Then put all that shit into action.

If it feels uncomfortable at first, that's understandable. What the feminized Western world teaches us about how the World works, and how the World (actually) works is two different things.

You're new here. Things get fuzzy out of perspective. You need the whole picture.

Get to reading.

whinemoreplease · 2015-09-02T03:41:51+00:00

Read the sidebar you lazy shit.

You don't feel right because you realize you are a giant fucking pussy who's been trained by blue pill society to be completely scared of taking personal responsibility. We (generalizing red pill here) embrace failure because failing intelligently means progress. You (generalizing blue pill here) are afraid to fail.

I'm also guessing the book is the "Surrendered Wife"?

I'm just feeling like all of our problems couldn't have been her fault, you know?

All your problems are your fault. Read the sidebar.

BlackKnightofthePill · 2015-09-02T06:04:54+00:00

What book?

You could be uncomfortable for a couple reasons. One, you don't really understand what's happening or don't really understand the changing dynamics. For that, tag the sidebar, as others have said.

Two, she is working on maximizing her potential as a woman and you're possibly not making the same strides as a man. This is a phenomenon called dread. Usually when one SO it's improving and the other isn't it makes the non-improver uncomfortable to say the least. At last it makes them concerned that the person will be able to attract higher value people of the opposite sex. I'm not saying that's happening necessarily.

Three, you mentioned in another comment that you were working hard and spending blood, sweat and treats blah blah. That doesn't make you a man in the Red Pill sense. Any beta can be like that. It's called Beta Bucks. The sissy male who is good for comfort and financial support. As opposed to alpha fucks, who's good for fucking, as you might imagine.

As a married man, there's a fine line to walk. She's gonna give you shit sometimes, and probably it'll be something called a shit test, which you will understand and learn how to deal with it by reading the side bar. Basically you need to channel your alpha fucks persona. But sometimes it's going to be something called a comfort test. If you treat that like a shit test you fail. You'll learn about those and how to deal with them by reading the sidebar. Basically you channel beta bucks to pass it.

Married men usually are successful at marriage is they learn how to become an alpha provider. You'll see.

Right now til you read the sidebar I'm going to give you some quick bullet points yay won't steer you wrong.

Stop apologizing for shit, if you are. Canadians apologize (read Reddit), not alpha men. If you forget to do something she'd asked you to do, instead of apologizing, say something like "I forgot, I'll put it on my crowbar next time so it doesn't happen again".
Don't argue. It doesn't do any good. While women are certainly capable of tubing logically/rationally, it's not their first inclination, especially in a heated situation. Trying to explain logically why you're not a horrible person for not thinking to get her a glass of water when you got yourself one will rarely (never) work. You need to maintain frame. Read the sidebar about that concept. Also avoid DEER. Defend, explain, excuse, rationalize when you're getting shit from her. It weakens you're position and that's where she can (hopefully) proverbially go on for the kill. Instead, you need to learn how to respond to the emotion. Read the sidebar and read posts on here.
Start lifting weights if you don't already. If you do, lift heavy. If you don't, try the Stronglifts website and app.

Make make friends and spend time with them outside the home. This will give you needed independence and also will improve your value in her eyes.

Get a hobby that doesn't involve Internet, porn or video games. They sap your mental, physical and sexual energy and make you shitty.
Have sex frequently.

This is basic shit, but should be enough to get you started. You have a beautifully unique opportunity, because your wife is practically begging you to step up.

TLDR: READ THE SIDEBAR.

StuffaYouFace · 2015-09-02T06:05:20+00:00

Your getting criticized because you have posted before reading the sidebar and required material. This isn't just some random forum where you post your relationship bullshit and we share in your feelz.

You do the work, swallow the pill, then you can post and get insight.

You just got handed a gift from your wife. She wants to be woman and wants you to be a man. You either step up or we will see you over in the divorce subreddit soon.

Next time you come back, we expect you to have done your homework.

Sepean · 2015-09-02T07:24:50+00:00

You have one shot at saving your marriage.

Here's what happened.

You wife think you suck and she isn't attracted to you. She tried bitching and denying you sex, but you didn't get the picture.

After years of this, in a last ditch effort to save your marriage she found a book on how to be a submissive wife. She's still not attracted to you, but she is forcing herself to be a better wife and hoping you respond in kind. You can sense this, and that's why you think something is off.

My guess is she isn't cleaning the house because of a covert contract: she's planning to reward you with that if you man up.

So what can you do here? You can stay a weak man and she'll get fed up and either go back to bitching and denying you sex or just leave you. Or you can man up.

If you think this will last, you're dead wrong. It takes a lot of willpower for a woman to please a man she doesn't like and she'll only do that for so long unless you improve.

Did your wife by any chance have a part in you "stumbling upon" this subreddit?

Now go read Married Man Sex Life Primer (it's on the sidebar) and follow the advice to a t. It will be hard; I had a hellish marriage and that burning platform gave me a lot of motivation to work on myself. You'll have to do it to keep something good, and that can be harder. We don't know what we have until we lose it.

Lift and lead.

Title	Hey there.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	22
Date	September 2, 2015 2:48 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3jb08s/hey_there/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/hey-there.201106 https://theredarchive.com/post/201106

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