How exactly does one heal from the emotional toll of conscription?

I was born male, from a country with mandatory male-only conscription. Recently, I was found to be exempt for conscription, so that's past me thankfully. Before that, I had struggled immensely with anxiety, which cascaded to depression, identity issues, fear of women and society, etc. to this day, for which I had no-one to confide in. I had put my studies and pretty much my entire life on a 5-year hiatus at the detriment of my grades, was bullied for being anxious about conscription, and my issues downplayed and used against me by ... women who didn't have to be subject to it. I felt incredibly envious and afraid. Most of this still affects me from time to time.

I've been managing. I've resumed my studies and have been rediscovering my hobbies. I picked up some light gaming in my free time. A lot has happened so I'm trying to adjust. However, there are times the intrusive thoughts really hit me hard, about my anxieties and how I was treated just because I was born male, even if I'm mostly past that. I've had a female alter since my identity issues began, whom I would mentally escape to and confide in. From then on, I've been socialising as a woman most of the time, which gives me a semblance of peace but worries me a little as I feel disconnected for lack of a better word.

Sometimes I just feel lost. I don't really know how to overcome the emotional toll, if I can overcome it.