Been thinking a lot about this lately. Men are trained from day one to be protector and provider. Let's talk about the 'Provider' part of it. We men usually don't keep any track of our money spend on women. Especially if they lump their expenses along with the children's expenses. Let's dissect the receipts .

Bucket 1 'The Essentials':

This bucket of expenses is wherein a man spends money on all that is essential and mandated by the religion and the law. This would include food, water, shelter and clothing. All the essentials that are required to keep people alive. I.e. paying for eating out ≠ Food. Groceries = Food. In this bucket we can put the bare bone basics. Most men earn x5 to x10 more than what they need to live comfortably. The left over is what we men can and should enjoy for ourselves, conditioned that we have satisfied bucket 1 but we spend our extra earned money on bucket 2.

Bucket 2 'The extras':

This bucket is the gravy train that men provide to women and women consider it basic 'Manners'. All the expenses in this bucket are non-essential to life. They are mere entertainment. No law, no religious book ever mandated these expenses on a man towards the woman. This bucket is a social construct. Law considers it 'Gift. Religion considers it 'Charity'.

I.e. paying for her

  • Nails
  • Expensive dinners
  • Name brand clothing, shoes, apparels, make-up, etc.
  • Vacations (Local or abroad)
  • Her education/vocational trainings
  • loaning money
  • Gadgets/appliances to make her house work easy.
  • etc.

Bucket 2 also includes time and energy

I.e.

  • listing to her troubles is providing unpaid therapy time.
  • Lifting heavy things for her = free physical labor.
  • Pick ups and drop offs = free Uber ride.
  • Mentoring her in any business/job/trade = free knowledge transfer.
  • etc.

I would encourage men to realign their thinking a bit. I.e. who mandated a man paying for a dinner date. Jesus never ordained it, Muhammad never ordered it. The constitution never asked men to pay for vacations (US specific). We men have been duped into paying for a lot more by Culture that it is being considered basic package deal, while we have been upsizing their meals all along. Ask yourself, are fully able bodied adult women really deserving of Gifts/Charity?

Thoughts please.