Betrayed by feminism?

Exarch · 2010-02-13T18:45:54+00:00

I may be among the few, but I can't help but feel while reading this that these women are under the impression that baby = happy. In fact, you may have noticed that the nutritional facts of babies show that the amount of happiness they contain is 0mg.

melb22 · 2010-02-13T22:22:51+00:00

The "provider" role espoused by the author of this article is as damaging to men as the "housewife/mother" role is/was to women.

People are individuals, we're smarter than our biology, we need the freedom to live our lives as we see fit, not to be forced into a narrow role defined by social conservatives. Some people really don't even want kids and a family, I actually broke up with a girl I was really in love with because she was so set against ever having kids (and i'm not 100% sure either way).

Live and let live, stop trying to define yourself by your gender alone.

kanuk876 · 2010-02-13T17:04:31+00:00

FTA:

She doesn't think of this as a great act of feminist independence. She feels scarred by her experience of being a feminist modern woman, so much so that she didn't want to bring a girl into the world:

I'd convinced myself it was a boy because I felt I'd be better off with a male child. I didn't want my daughter to have to struggle with the pressure of trying to 'have it all' as I have. The sad and uncomfortable truth is that being a woman has often made me unhappy, and I didn't want my daughter to be unhappy either.

This sends shivers down my spine. I'm sure part of her wants a boy for good reason. But I suspect her subconscious wants a boy so she can fulfill her need for male affection and attention through him, since she has no adult man in her life.

In Child Abuse circles, we call this Mother-Son Emotional Incest. And despite being very common, it's no less damaging to the son than other forms of abuse. Her son doesn't have a chance, not only because he'll be forced to play the part of emotional father and husband to this woman's needs, but because nobody around him will help or even recognize the suffering and loss he will experience. And he'll have no adult man to protect him from his mother, nor cut the apron strings when becomes older. Maybe, maybe if he's lucky, he will find his way to a therapist before he gets too old. And he can fill-in some of his own emotional needs at $100/hour. All to satisfy this woman's selfish desire to "have it all".

Reminds me of a quote I read from a male survivor of child abuse: "When I have sex with my girlfriend, I feel like I'm cheating on my mom."

I feel sorry for her son, should she have one.

Offensive_Brute · 2010-02-13T11:38:53+00:00

i think its always good to raise awareness regarding the perils of deliberately denying human nature in pursuit of irrational ideologies.

This reminds me of a scene from family guy with the busy business lady that has all her problems solved by a mans penis.

Alanna · 2010-02-13T16:02:23+00:00

The answer isn't to push women back towards being obligatory housewives and child-bearers. Obviously, one extreme doesn't work any better than the other. The women quoted in the article definitely sound like they were ill-served by the one-size-fits all anti-man backlash of 70s feminism, but, from their own words, the problem was more that they never felt "allowed" to be wives or mothers, they felt a "duty" to feminism to be independent symbols of what women could achieve. Why not let each individual woman choose the path that makes her happy, and not try to pre-program her as a independent career woman OR as a mother-wife? Some women are perfectly happy to live out their lives unmarried and childless. And some women just want to get married and have kids. I never bothered to go to college because I never wanted a career. Now at 31, with a lot of retail experience but no real marketable skills, I'm struggling to help support my family. Did I make the right choices? I don't know, but at least they were my choices, and they made me the person I am today.

(On my second marriage, 17 weeks pregnant, wanted most to be a wife/mother since I was a teenager. First try didn't work out so hot. Very lucky to get a second chance.)

linkedlist · 2010-02-15T12:25:48+00:00

Ah yes, conservatives have allt he answers, let's rally behind them and their freedom loving principles involving the sanctity of marriage and the holding back of womens rights.

stemgang · 2010-02-13T10:36:44+00:00

Feminism castrates men. Then they are surprised to find themselves unattracted to eunuchs.

Also, a free-loving gal that has been fucked-and-chucked many times will find that Mr. Right is no longer attracted to her.

Title	Betrayed by feminism?
Author	melb22
Upvotes	23
Comments	58
Date	February 13, 2010 9:03 AM UTC (16 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/b1lj4/betrayed_by_feminism/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/betrayed-by-feminism.1050810 https://theredarchive.com/post/1050810

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