I was married for about 7 years, together for 10 years.
I paid off the ex wife and retained the house, albeit I had to give up a pension plan with the army for 4 years. I firmly believe in parents staying together and a relationship takes work with an understanding that neither partner is perfect.
She deceived me into putting my life savings into a new kitchen prior to the divorce being started, thinking she would get the house, maintenance and I would be paying the mortgage.
In the last 30 months, I've moved jobs twice. Now earning just under twice what I was earning before. I had an 8 month relationship which didn't work out, but getting laid was quite nice.
She has had relationships 'accidently' sending me gifts meant for him. Extravagant gifts such as the Liverpool FC calendar (/s).
As it turns out she's now broke and had to ask one of the school mum's for a loan, after making idiotic moves and not having any cash.
She has accused me of all sorts of things, such as financial abuse, because I refused to give her the house and wanted the court to decide. She has low self esteem but has never really faced any hardship. She went for a job and her colleague got it. Her colleague is a bit of a bitch, but when she got it, my ex wife slammed the phone down on her. Not a good way to be professional. She applied for 4 different jobs, didn't get any of them. She is now on sick leave for 'stress'.
I have 3 dates lined up this week. Which after going through a dry spell for a few months, is pretty good. Not arguing with it.
After doing a play date with a friends mum, she asked me if I would ever consider going back with her.
I said I believe marriage is for 2 partners and for the best interest of the child. But it's now over 2 years since we divorced, so any benefit of staying together has disappeared. She has also shown that she is untrustworthy and why she could have depended on me, she has now shown that I could never depend on her.
The prospect of a broke, untrustworthy ex wife with a mountain of self esteem issues is not an attractive one. Quite frankly, I don't want her fucking up my life anymore.
She thought she was a thirty something who thought the grass was greener. Now she's a 40 year old broke single mother in a shit flat.
You reap what you sow.
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