Men struggle in modern marriages

TeaCupJoe1 · 2012-10-15T03:49:45+00:00

I was reading an article on mancaves the other day and one common thing I noticed was how the men featured essentially were kicked out of their own home or had their interests compressed into a single room and it was if their wives "gave permission" for them to have this room as their own domain while the wife gets the rest of the house to do as she pleases.

If I'm contributing to a household (financially or otherwise) then you can bet I'll be having some of my stuff in and around the house and having an equal say in how the house looks and its furnishings. None of this "I only do what my wife allows me to do" crap, it'll be what we mutually agree to do.

Or else I just won't get married.

ChokinMrElmo · 2012-10-15T09:24:28+00:00

Marriage is such a ridiculous idea to me now that I will never get married even if I find the love of my life.

I'm not even sure I want kids anymore. It'd be like getting a sweet car, and then one day your girlfriend absconds with it. Both of your names are on the title, so you go to court, only to find that they don't give a fuck about you because the judge gets paid for making you pay her. So now, not only do you not get to drive this sweet car, but you must now pay for her gas and car insurance. So, while she drives around town with her new boyfriend and dismantles all of the unique parts you added to your beloved ride, you must work two jobs just to barely scrape by.

Fuck that noise.

MartialWay · 2012-10-14T23:46:24+00:00

"The truth, of course, is more complex. Well-heeled men often recover financially from divorce more easily than their ex-wives and some evade all responsibilities. "

In a relationship between equals, why would one have responsibilities to another adult?

2012-10-15T00:40:15+00:00

As an Indian male near 30, there is huge pressure to get married. I am resisting it. I can lose everything I have worked hard for at the whim of the wife. It is a deeply unfair system. Instead of balancing it out, they have skewed it towards women who can walk away with a lot of money and the kids.

2012-10-15T00:13:15+00:00

No shit. We aren't marrying these skanks. Tell me more Kate Bolick, about the end of men.

2012-10-15T14:30:03+00:00

This may not be popular, but we as a collective must take responsibility for this. (ofcourse there are many men out there who are completely un-aware of this cause and assume it is the norm) You should not marry some one unless you know them well (imo have lived with them for a period of time) and both have a reasonable expectation of what will happen as a part of married life. ofcourse there are evil wenches out there who will completely chance post-hooneymoon. But I would like to think that they are a rarity

xendylu · 2012-10-16T01:25:02+00:00

this reminds me of jon and kate plus eight. he worked so hard for the family. and she gave hom so much shit over little things. like where to stand in the store. I'm glad he got out.

GimmeBackMyBullets · 2012-10-15T00:17:00+00:00

I can see where this would be true in some relationships. It certainly seems to be what's expected in popular culture. But any time a marriage isn't equal, it's not a good marriage. I did the stay-at-home mom thing for many years, for the simple fact that my husband lacked the ability to easily lactate, and later had an established good-enough-paying job. Now that the kids are all in school, i only work part-time, but i am still the primary homemaker. It's fair, and it works for us. To suggest that women expect the men to do all the work and make them the money is not a rarity, unfortunately, but i would not say it's any kind of new norm either.

SCCROW · 2012-10-15T03:32:37+00:00

Oh geez - no kidding - they do struggle in modern marriages...

Even when they are not even married!

That is how bad marriage is today!

Title	Men struggle in modern marriages
Author	Subversive
Upvotes	40
Comments	25
Date	October 14, 2012 9:13 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/11h7f6/men_struggle_in_modern_marriages/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/men-struggle-in-modern-marriages.1011360 https://theredarchive.com/post/1011360

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