Vasectomy can lead to castration

From: http://dontfixit.org/forum/posts/030630.htm

From: C.J. Date: 6-15-03 Subject: Vasectomy leads to castration

I would like to relate a tale of utter horror I have gone through with my vasectomy. In June of 2002 I had a vasectomy performed. Right away there were complications, namely an infection that spread to my testicles. After 3 rounds of antibiotics, my general practitioner referred me to a urologist who informed me that I needed a dual orchiectomy, in essence making me a eunuch. My wife was rather concerned about this procedure, but after 5 separate second consultations I knew I had to have the operation. The antibiotics had failed and I was in severe pain and had massive swelling in my testicles and scrotum.

The orchiectomy was performed and the pain and swelling subsided within a week. Now I was faced with the fact that I had to live my life as a eunuch and had some psychological problems to deal with. Months of counseling helped, but there was one more insult to add to my injury. My wife told me she wanted another child. We have 2 wonderful kids already. This reversal of her decision caused me to become very angry and resentful of her because of the shared decision we had made for me to get a vasectomy.

My wife informed me that she wanted to adopt another child, I told her NO, since I had become a eunuch and had to wear testosterone patches, she would not get to adopt a child. She had her chance to have another child when I was still fully functional. As you would expect, this has caused friction in the relationship, but too damn bad! I made the ultimate sacrifice for our relationship and I will have a large say on how our lives will progress.

I used to be a robust man of 6' 5", 220 lbs. Now I weigh 153 lbs. Quite a change, I think most of it is due to psychological factors, but never the less, I cannot put on muscle mass even though I eat right and work out diligently.

Since the operation I have been non-functional sexually and have erectile dysfunction. Viagra does not do the trick, I need to use that damn Caverject, you know-the tube you have to stick in your penis to squirt the Caverject compound into the urethra.

Sex is actually painful for me now, my wife tries to understand, but she cannot fully understand the physical changes a man goes through when he loses his "manhood." I take full responsibility for my actions, I underwent the vasectomy because my wife and I had decided not to have anymore children. It was also a shared decision as man and wife. To this day she is reluctant to accept any responsibility for her part in the decision process. I understand her: She cannot accept the fact that she played decision role in my mutilation.

The final insult to this nightmare happened on my 35th birthday. I had just come from an appointment at my urologist for a 90 day post-op checkup. My wife had a planned a birthday party for me, I arrived and was talking with my friends and having a good time, suddenly I felt some something warm trickling down my leg, I had urinated on myself. There was no urge to go to the bathroom; it just happened. I was highly embarrassed by this situation. While I went to the bedroom to change clothes, my wife actually told some of our friends that I had a botched vasectomy and had another operation to remove my testicles.

So you now can add incontinence to my medical issues. My friends never looked at me the same again after my wife told them my complete shame as an ex-man. That night I packed my stuff and moved out, I told my wife I could not put up with her intentional breach of my personal privacy.

My urologist thinks that there is some residual nerve damage from the operation. I am now on three different medications for incontinence, loss of testosterone (the patch), Xanax, and Procain tablets.

As it stands now, I have reconciled with my wife. I needed her to accept her role in what had happened to me, and through counseling she finally accepted her role in the nightmare. I laid down some fairly tough needs and desires that had to be met by her if our relationship was to stay alive. I would not compromise on several key relationship issues: It was a "take it or leave it" situation.

To all men thinking about a vasectomy: DON'T DO IT! Condoms are much cheaper than your manhood. If your wife or girlfriend's pressure you to have a vasectomy, tell them to have a radical mastectomy and have them think how they would feel afterward.