Men and women can call each other out without any major issues. Men can call out other men without having their status as a man questioned, he won't get called a gender traitor. Sure he'll antagonize some guys but his group membership (in this case the group of men) won't be questioned.

The problem with women is that the good ones aren't allowed to call out the bad ones because they'll be "excommunicated from the sisterhood", it's basically social suicide. This is what makes women afraid to speak out. It's understandable that they don't want to lose their circle of friends or whatever but it's a toxic culture/environment to be in. There are obviously bad behaviors that many women would agree are bad if personally asked, yet none are openly calling the behavior bad/reprehensible like people are with men's shortcomings in general or within relationships.

I'd say the "it's not enough to not be racist, you have to be actively anti racist" slogan should probably apply to gender issues: "you can't just be not be an emotional abuser, you have to be actively anti-emotional abuse", "you can't just not be a gold digger, you have to actively be anti-gold digger".