As a gay guy I feel like I can definitively say that men are trash...
Once I started dating, I barely got much attention from men. I had an average body type because I didn’t lift but I wasn’t obese or anything. Barely any guys would message me or want to meet up with me.
Then, after I graduated college, I had more free time and decided to work on my body and after several months of lifting every day and getting more muscular I got tons of male attention and many men wanted to go on dates and hook up with me.
When I started going on dates, most guys seemed to be players and were only nice for the end goal of getting sex. If I didn’t give sex very quickly they would often just ghost or passive aggressively ignore. I felt like they didn’t want to have conversation or companionship, just sex...
I slowly realized that many (most?) gay men are like straight men in the sense that they are very motivated by looks and sex appeal and have little interest in common interests companionship or personality. Most guys did not care about what music I liked, what food I liked to eat, what I liked to do in my free time... all they seemed to care about was how I looked and how they could get sex from me. I also noticed that I had a weird psychological disconnection from most of the guys I went on dates on, like we just had different views on what is enjoyable. For example, most guys didn’t like female pop stars or going to social events like dance clubs. It was similar vibes that I got from straight men since I have always felt like straight men and I don’t share similar interests...
Another annoying realization that I had is that many (most?) men don’t want a monogamous relationship. Or if they want a monogamous relationship, they only want to have it with someone who is way above them in terms of looks. Also, if you are attractive enough for them to choose you, they want to make you their property/sex slave. I feel like a lot of guys didn’t want to “earn” a lasting relationship through kindness and respect. A lot of men find it annoying that I wanted their attention or wanted to do things with them other than sex.
This is why I think so many gay men are not in monogamous relationships. Many gay men (even gay bottoms) are in open relationships where they hook up with other people outside of their main relationship.
After going through so many failed dating experiences like this I started feeling really dead inside. I feel like most men are incapable of love because they are too emotionally retarded to handle it. I think this is probably a lot of women become dead inside and just desire a man who will take whatever they can get from a man even if he’s an asshole (I.e get into a relationship just cus the guy gives her money).
Dating is so messed up but I think these problems have been presence since the beginning of time. Men have issues with commitment and forming romantic/sexual relationships that are based on kindness and respect.
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