Advice to get through a rough patch

anothergoodbook · 2022-12-26T18:21:41+00:00

Hi! I am in the tail end of this.

What has helped the most is reading and implementing the skills that Laura Doyle talks about in The Empowered Wife. I also listen to her podcast which is a huge help.

Ok_Obligation_6110 · 2022-12-26T18:40:18+00:00

Not been married that long but I just had a baby and it’s been a lot harder than I imagined as I’m sure it is for all new parents. My husband and I remind each other that everything is a season. It has kept me sane.

I remind myself that hard things aren’t hard forever and that one day the hard parts will be a distant memory. It helps to shift my mindset to try to focus on keeping mental or even digital snap shots of good things that happen each day. A moment of peace, my baby’s morning smiles, the way my husband grabbed me a mug of coffee after I showered. Eventually you’ll find yourself having more and more happiness and intimacy when you notice more and more good moments day to day. Despite how much newborn life has rocked us, my husband and I have never loved each other more. It’s easy to get frustrated when things are tough, but they’ll get easier and in the meantime it’s time to let go of all expectations and just go with the flow as if it’s a season that will pass.

hipopper · 2022-12-27T00:42:29+00:00

Read Love Sense

alady-in-the-streets · 2022-12-28T06:00:32+00:00

What really helps patches like this is physical touch, at least for my husband and I. It creates the sense that this is not just another person in your life that you need to tolerate. It doesn't need to be super affectionate or intimate, but touching his back when you pass by, giving him a short hug when he's standing somewhere doing something, giving him some back scratches in bed.

Another (sort of macabre) tip is to meditate on how much you would miss him if he were gone. The feeling of an empty bed, nobody to kiss, etc. It puts into perspective that the little things that annoy you or put you on the defense aren't worth souring the time you have with him, which is limited.

And above all, say you're sorry. If you've been irritable/defensive, just apologize. Doesn't matter if he reciprocates, or even seems to care. It's all about breaking the cycle, recognizing your faults, and holding yourself accountable. You can only control yourself, and if he sees you putting in the effort to better your mood and to be kind to him, he will likely do the same.

ghua · 2023-01-02T23:12:26+00:00

More sex☝️ Edit: gentle*

AutoModerator · 2022-12-26T16:07:09+00:00

Title: Advice to get through a rough patch

Full text: Married 14 years, 3 kids (13-8). This past year has been hands down the most challenging in our marriage. I just don’t feel like we are acting as a team, enjoying time together and being a comfort to each other. Our communication is very defensive and tit for tat or avoiding.

I (35f) have been doing some intensive therapy/ self work this year. So I will admit I have been more into my feelings. My husband (36m) has been more stressed with finances as we moved (larger bills) and big changes in our business.

We love each other very deeply. Nothing is going on that would cause us to not want to be together. It’s just we haven’t been in this difficult place before and I’m not sure how to reconnect again. As I am writing out my goals for next year I would like to improve our overall intimacy and connection, I’m just not sure how to do that.

Tips please! What has helped you get through a rough patch?

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Title	Advice to get through a rough patch
Author	gg2700
Upvotes	14
Comments	8
Date	December 26, 2022 4:07 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/zvq9ha/advice_to_get_through_a_rough_patch/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/advice-to-get-through-a-rough-patch.1145712 https://theredarchive.com/post/1145712

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