How to get into a serious relationship

_Citizen_Erased_ · 2018-04-27T00:19:33+00:00

You make minimal effort you say....

You’re not waiting around.

Have you found one that you really wanted to start a relationship with? It seems like the ones you have been in dates with weren’t worth your time. Do you want some guy that you’re barely interested in to pursue you? Also, don’t expect someone to do all the work when it comes to showing interest. It honestly sounds like you just didn’t hit it off.

I’ll give you some great advice. Women on dating apps get something like 20x more messages on average than men. There are actually some really decent guys on there that are looking to love someone and be good to them. I know because I used to be one of those guys. Why don’t you try looking through some profiles for someone that stands out? Women almost never ever do that. It’s extremely rare. They lazily sit back and sift through the guys that already messaged them. That way, there is zero chance of rejection and literally everyone that you reply to is already ‘thirsty’ for you and therefore beneath you and too easy. Go out and find a badass, and message him first. No woman does that. It would benefit you to no end.

shrimpwife · 2018-04-26T23:51:21+00:00

You just have to find someone who really gets along with you and will want to hang out again. Where do you live? I ask cause I learned in my psychology class, the more arousal there is (NOT sexual arousal) on like a date, the more the two people will like eachother. Maybe try going on a difficult/risky hike, to an amusement park (rollercoasters are fun), shooting, laser tag, go see a scary or suspenseful movie, explore some abandoned or spooky places.

What do you normally do for dates? Talking over a coffee or lunch doesn't make much arousal.

ReesesReaper · 2018-04-27T06:51:29+00:00

Hey there, man here to give some friendly advice.

TL:DR - get men to like you. Give a guy you like kisses on the cheek on the first date. Cook him delicious meals like steak and sweet potato pie. Learn to give 20 min deep tissue neck massages. Understand that men wanna sleep with you and some will resent you if you hold off for more than 3 dates which reduces a woman's likability.

First off, considering you are an intelligent and attractive woman who has her life together remember that you are at a great advantage in getting and keeping a good man. You stated that proudly so just remember that fact when a guy loses interest. It's nothing against you. Men do seek sex as their main interest, but if that's all you're selling than that's all they'll be interested in, figuratively speaking.

If you wear slutty clothes then you're gonna attract the wrong type of man. A woman who dresses very classy is one that a man can appreciate as a classy woman. Classy women attract classy men. Classy men respect women.

The point I'm making in the next few paragraphs will try to help overcome the first obstacle women face in getting a guy to actually start"liking" you as person and not a sexual object.

What I mean by that is that women are walking vaginas to men until proven different. That's the first thing we are interested in because that's all we see from our perspective. You are aware of this I'm sure, but I have further points to my statements.

Considering this, you need to respect that perspective of men and don't ever hold it against a guy to want to sleep with you and never call you again. Men get teased by women constantly and that causes resentment. Putting a number system on how many dates only makes things worse for trying to get a relationship. If a guy is patient enough he'll nail and bail after 10 dates if he's determined, and will do so happily because the resentment can be strong at that point. Likability is destroyed by resentment.

What you need to do is show men that you are more than a waking vagina. This will cause the man you attract to want something more than sex.

Ask the guy you're with genuine questions to find his interests and then expand on them. Guys like girls who show they care about their hobbies no matter what they are. If he says collecting marbles and that turns you off then don't make him feel bad for it, he'll like you for that.

Keep in mind that if you cause resentment in keeping sex away then he won't care about the other things you have to offer. I'm not saying sleep with every man who takes you out on a date, but try throwing guys kisses on the cheek on the first date, do this during and not at the end. That right there is a form of affection that will spark curiosity in a guy and keep pressure away for you to sleep with him. Curiosity is key in getting a guy to want to get to know a girl.

The kiss on the cheek shows that you are affectionate and giving, which are qualities men really appreciate in a woman.

If you can give a man a proper 20 min neck massage then he will really like you.

Final big point, make sure he knows you can cook an absolutely delicious meal, and if done after sex with a guy then you get bonus points. You have no idea how amazing it feels as a man to have a woman make you delicious food after sex. A key to guy's heart is through his stomach.

WhatIsThisAccountFor · 2018-04-28T04:04:14+00:00

so I recently got into online dating apps.

Almost every woman I see that has trouble dating relies on apps to date. Don't rely on apps.

The thing about dating, is usually you date someone you know prior, so giving up sex or getting him to commit within 2-3 dates is not a big deal because you know the person. Online dating accelerates everything. Most people like it because it gets past the ambiguous "are you attracted to me or not?" phase, but with removing that you remove a lot of aspects that have to be discovered very quickly. Namely the "Well how sexually open are you?" phase. A man has to initiate sex or he will never have any, so if a man doesn't ask you for sex (or ask you into sexual situations) by date 2-3 he risks being friend zoned and wasting even more time and money dates on someone who is not actually interested in filling his sexual desire. Essentially, men HAVE to go for sex, women don't, so women often don't understand the rush men are in to get sex because women can accidentally get sex.

If the guy is getting bored, odds are you are not really interesting or interested enough to warrant his attention without offering up sex. All men will lose interest eventually without sex, but how long they are willing to hold out is a combination of how good you look, how interesting you are, what else you can offer them, and how well your life goals line up.

What about you is interesting? What are you offering these men (since you aren't having sex with them)? Are you indicating what you're looking for on your dating profile? Are they surprised to find out you are conservative?

And lastly: a lot of women don't realize that they can get men to go out with them via dating apps that would never commit to them. These men go out with these women out of either purelyr boredom or sexual interest. You need to realistically look at yourself and understand that just because that 10/10 guy swipes right to you, or sends you a message, doesn't mean he ever plans to commit to you. Is he realistically within your league? If he's a 10/10 and you're like a 7/10, he probably has no interest other than sex in seeing you. That's just a harsh reality that a lot of women specifically in online dating struggle with.

My suggestion is meet men in real life. Men you know in real life would never risk dating you just to have sex with you if they aren't actually interested in you. At least not if you meet them through friend groups or have some other version of an intertwined social circle.

aftertheafter-party · 2018-04-27T01:25:11+00:00

I would tell your friends & family (those who you like, trust, & with whom you share values) that you want to find a good man (& that you want to [be married, have children -- whatever is true for you about your goals]) & ask them if they know anyone to whom they can provide an introduction.

simplisticallysimple · 2018-04-28T00:06:56+00:00

I have no problem getting a guy, my problem is trying to keep them around.

So you're just getting pumped and dumped? That's nothing to be proud of. Literally any woman can "get" a guy without "keeping them around."

kyasouprra · 2018-04-26T22:29:39+00:00

How old are you?

Title	How to get into a serious relationship
Author	wineandpineapples25
Upvotes	13
Comments	28
Date	April 26, 2018 9:51 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/8f6i0e/how_to_get_into_a_serious_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-to-get-into-a-serious-relationship.74653 https://theredarchive.com/post/74653

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