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aftertheafter-party Archive

View 11 posts and 300 comments by aftertheafter-party on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Yes, it's just 50 swings & 50 squats, then 40 / 40, 30 /30, 20 / 20, 10 / 10 (sorry for the slow response -- your username is hilariously applicable)
/r/RedPillWomen13/09/19 06:47 PM
4

Drink water, wear sunscreen, & consider finding a good therapist. Practice having good posture & a pleasant facial expression. I've found it helpful to accept opportunities to speak in public, which forces you to at least fake a certain level of confidence & self-possession (could be as simple as offering to make a toast or say a prayer at a family dinner). Also, read or listen to audio books -- helps you add more value in conversations.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/19 04:53 PM
2

I wondered this EXACT thing yesterday!! One of my favorite home workout elements to incorporate is a 50-40-30-20-10 swing/squat set, but the only other thing I ever use it for is to hold to my chest while I do crunches. I guess you could use it for weighted bridges, but I have a medicine ball I prefer for that...
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/19 04:46 PM
14

Being 24 & never having kissed someone is not "bad" or anything, but it is extremely unusual. & then you say you were open to fooling around with him when you had barely just met him? That honestly makes you sound very low-value in the way you are viewing yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/19 02:43 PM
9

He did say I love you about 6 weeks in and has generally shown by his willingness to make little sacrifices for me that he means it. This seems pretty fast to me, but you're both so young that I can also kind of understand. I think you are being a bit naive, but not in a way that is likely to hurt you : ) I agree with you that it sounds like the beginning of a serious relationship with marriage potential.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/19 02:32 PM
2

Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen12/08/19 03:58 PM
12

u/hannaebeth u/catipillar Barney's Warehouse Clearance sale online!!
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 01:17 PM
14

💕
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/19 01:13 PM
19

When I was your age, I kept a journal & would specifically write down the things I saw during each day that I thought were interesting, funny, beautiful -- those make great things to share with people! I still make note of things like that so that when my husband asks how my day was, I can tell him about the puppy I saw, or the couple having a wild argument at a stoplight, or a new song I like, or an interesting debate friends were having. Sharing my feelings about my day make me feel closer tha…
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/19 05:26 PM
4

My husband is also very "masculine" & has a high-power, stressful job. For him / us, yoga was the more physically active version of meditation so we can do a little cardio + that, & he doesn't feel like he's missing a workout. ​ Another thing I'd suggest is just to make yourself a little more exciting in small ways that you enjoy: try some new recipes, get a facial, get into a new podcast. It sounds very stupid, but if I'm into something (e.g. the recent "beau-tuber drama" w/ James Charles & Tat…
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/19 03:28 AM
5

We take a lot of long walks together, & we just signed up for a yoga class together. ​ Can you plan a vacation together? Sounds like you need a reset.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/19 02:55 PM
4

Both work full time. My husband takes out the trash daily, does most of the laundry, does the bulk of the grocery shopping, unloads the dishes every morning, & makes coffee. I do most of the cleaning, all of the cooking, some laundry tasks, & shop for specialty ingredients or grab a couple things to finish off dinner. I also keep the house tidy & organized. For us, it comes down to teamwork. We both want a clean, comfortable living space, so we pick up each other's slack. If I want to do my nail…
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/19 04:26 PM
2

I just flew back from traveling across the country to celebrate a wedding. I was clearly talking about a wedding. A wedding is the event to commemorate a marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/19 05:32 AM
2

Definitely don't disagree with the OP, since I wrote it. I grew up in the US in a major city. Bringing the 2 communities together is an extremely universal thing -- that is literally what a wedding is.
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 08:20 PM
1

We can agree that "girlfiend/boyfriend" isnt a respectable term. Partner is. ​ I don't want to fight, but I don't agree with you here. Boy/girlfriend are perfectly respectable terms for people who are dating. Partner is a respectable term for people trying to accomplish a goal together. I just flew back from traveling across the country to celebrate a wedding. In my experience, a marriage is when your entire mutual communities are invited to unite on both sides to support you as a new family. Th…
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/19 04:38 AM
2

You left out the part where it also showed the declining marriage rate. I actually did include that in the section I quoted. You mentioned higher rates of divorce, but it seems divorce rates are lower right now; that was my intent in sharing that link with you. No one can predict the future, but it would seem to me that the trend of fewer people marrying more conscientiously - while also being more mature, making more money, & being better educated - bodes well for those who have chosen to marry…
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/19 09:19 PM
2

According to the World Economic Forum, divorce rates are actually on a downward trend: "Cohen notes that both marriage and divorce rates are dropping. And as the divorce rate is calculated as a percentage of marriages, the 18% fall in divorces between 2008 (when ACS began collecting data) and 2016 isn’t merely a consequence of fewer marriages. The implication is that contemporary unions are lasting longer than those of 10 years ago." https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2018/10/divorce-united-states-d…
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/19 06:32 PM
1

Do you have a favorite recipe?
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/19 02:56 AM
2

My husband eats a pretty low-carb diet, so my bread is usually wasted on him, but it is still a fantastic thing to bring to parties : )
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/19 02:55 AM
2

Steak & twice-baked potatoes with a big salad is always a winner at my house!
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/19 02:53 AM
5

You're only 6 months into this relationship -- I would be cautious about assuming that words mean actual commitment the way you want it. As I mentioned in a previous comment, just continue to vet him vigorously, & don't simply go all-in because of sex / living together. Watch for his actions to match up with what he says.
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/19 05:00 AM
1

Ok, fine. LMAO, if you are so determined to have a sex life that will inevitably "collapse," go for it! If you ever change your mind & decide you'd prefer a long life of fun, fulfilling sex with a loving partner, hit me back, & I'll share my tips : )
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 10:17 PM
5

What is your intent posting here about this? I don't get your end-game, & I don't think it's providing value to the women here.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 10:10 PM
5

Fine, here's 5 seconds of my life given to you as a gift to demonstrate that it's not inevitably a dusty desert in a married sex life: https://www.gottman.com/blog/building-great-sex-life-not-rocket-science/ Or, if you aren't interested in a renowned psychological researcher & a study based on 70,000 international participants, perhaps you'll accept my anecdotal evidence: I've been married for years to my dreamy husband who fxcks me at least 10x/week, & his last text to me was a bunch of kissy h…
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 10:06 PM
6

You want me to do research in order to prove your point (with which I disagree) to myself? Your tone is so rude, & the above post contributes nothing to the conversation. It may be true that many relationships lose a sexual spark early on; however, this should not be accepted as the norm or an inevitable stage in a relationship. It's much more helpful & productive to continue to work to build & maintain strong sexual energy in a long-term relationship. In fact, that is one of the main tenets of …
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 09:55 PM
7

I do think 6 months is fast to be living together, regardless of the sex timeline. My main advice would be to make sure you continue to vet him carefully, & don't make the mistake of committing to him simply because you've committed to him. If he turns out to not be the right man for you, it will be easier to break up when you discover that rather than stay together / get married / eventually divorce simply because you already had sex & moved in with him.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 09:10 PM
5

Please cite your sources rather than merely alluding to their existence, especially if your main point is that the data support your argument. I can guarantee to you that 3 years is not an expiration date for chemical highs & sexual tension in a relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 09:06 PM
5

(sexual foundations collapse within 2-3 years because... biology and neuroscience) Not really relevant to the OP's questions, but this is not true.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/19 08:23 PM
3

Or a super good judgement about who safely to mess around with & a high libido. I'm not recommending promiscuity, but I don't think it precludes good judgement or the ability to commit.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 06:08 AM
3

My now-husband was really busy when we first started dating. He'd already asked me to be his "girlfriend" after maybe a month of weekly dates. I called him during lunch mid-week & told him I really enjoyed being with him, & I wanted to see him more than once a week. I think I literally said something like, "I want to be your actual girlfriend, not your weekend date."
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 06:03 AM
1

This may sound kind of rude, but when my mother was suggesting setting me up with my now-husband, I asked her point-blank, "Does it look like he's still hitting the gym?" I've told my family, his family, & him that both of us need to continue to be physically active in order to be mentally healthy. Both of us lean naturally toward anxiety & mild depression, so it's extremely important for us to keep up our battle by staying as healthy as possible by working out & eating right. I've been wanting …
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 04:12 AM
1

Even if they're still on birth control, that could be because they have unresolved health issues (e.g. trying to get thyroid regulated) or if they say they're not sure if they want kids, they may be deciding if they can afford IVF or adoption. Your friendships may be intimate, but this is one of the MOST intimate conversations.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/19 03:25 PM
3

I loved that!
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 02:26 PM
1

In my humble opinion, things only get more exciting past the ~nth date -- you begin to really start to know someone, & if it's worth pursuing, it will get more exciting for years to come. Even when maybe the "butterflies" slow down, the energy still continues to accelerate knowing you are both going deeper in your relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 05:20 AM
3

inspiration: love, poise, responsibility, creativity, joy & enthusiasm, loyalty, patience, sincerity, courage, wisdom, adjustability, sharing, growth
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 05:11 AM
1

I would just ask pretty bluntly, but in sort of a teasing / flirting way. So early on, neither person is really invested, & there is nothing to lose or gain so most people will respond honestly.
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/19 02:56 PM
9

This is my stupid-fast list of vetting questions I asked SO early to men before I got married (dating in the tinder/whatever time) -- on or before the first date, btw: - have you ever paid for sex or porn? - have you ever had a threesome or do you want one? - do you follow pornstars or random girls on social media? - do you want kids? - sex is so important; what does sex mean to you? - do you like your job? what would your ideal job be like?
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/19 05:23 AM
2

70s / 60s is such a sexy vibe
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/19 05:02 AM
2

I loved the jello / carrot / orange thing my mom used to make. I was just recently explaining to my husband how this was actually an amazing & delicious alternative to all the collagen adds we try to get through so many weird (& expensive!) supplements : ) ​
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/19 04:55 AM
3

Honestly, Kourtney / Kim Kardashian, Chrissy Teigan x my family (mama, MIL, SIL). Like a modern, clean "instagram" aspirational aesthetic + traditional healthy cooking & manners that make people feel at home & comfortable. Ideally, my husband would feel like he's got an instagram "thot" who worships his dxck & cooks like his grandmother (or a trendy hot spot restaurant, depending on the night). My go-to look is a classic glamour vibe: hat, sunglasses, dress (or top + skirt / gaucho pant), cute s…
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/19 04:50 AM
3

I think girls' nights or afternoons out are nice. It's not like I'm going to a club with my friends; we're playing golf or walking in the park or seeing a movie or having a glass of wine at a nice restaurant looking at pictures of celebrity hairstyles on instagram. My husband & I are both introverts, so giving him time alone at home is a gift. He has some extroverted friends that are a little much for me, so sometimes we'll go out as a group, or sometimes it will just be a guys' night, & I'll st…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 08:05 PM
1

Understood. I hope you get what you want! -- & more, actually -- I know I've gotten more than I ever hoped for out of my relationship/marriage. Neither of use are very religious, but we got so much out of premarital counseling. If you do decide to take things to another level commitment-wise, I'd recommend a counseling session with someone you both trust to make sure you're both on the same page for the future. Our wedding was important for so many reasons, but the best one was bringing our comm…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 04:33 AM
1

I've read through your comment a few times, & it's a lot to take in & respond to. Please forgive a little scatteredness in my thoughts below. I really appreciate the time you've taken to detail & expand upon your thinking! Ok, so I hear that you want a long-term, settled-feeling relationship, & you want kids & family. I also hear that you are concerned about being realistic about the things to which people are capable of committing, & you are concerned about taking your partner for granted / bei…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/19 01:27 AM
10

I won't share what I actually call my husband, because it would be equivalent to doxxing myself, but similar examples would be: popsicle, ravioli, bear cub... They all come from little moments we've shared over the years or inside jokes.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 10:16 PM
3

My husband & I both agree, people look their age. You can look like a good 50, but you look 50. People always card me & my husband, & we always get asked if we're students or where we study (I'm over 30, & he's 5 years older). We also always get asked how long we've been married or if we're on our honeymoon : ) I think the bigger thing people are picking up is not that we look young (I think I look a little older than my age honestly), but that we're happy & our energy is young!
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 09:36 PM
1

Your post will probably be removed soon, but while my husband is a great leader & does take care of me, I hold him & stroke his hair & sometimes read to him at bedtime. We all have our inner children still within us, & they need love too.
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/19 09:02 PM
2

I'm definitely interested in understanding the finer points of this relationship dynamic. Can you clarify what you want?
/r/RedPillWomen08/03/19 03:42 AM
2

neither of us are very optimistic about relationships anymore and didn't want to get into another one.) We are exclusive to each other under the agreement we just communicate when we don't want to be anymore (basically going with the flow while it's going well) ... We've been "a thing"... I just don't know whether this means he's gonna be breaking it off soon and I should stop trying I was referring to this rejection of a committed relationship / pervasive uncertainty that you describe in the OP…
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/19 11:04 PM
1

I feel curious where you think I made a disapproving comment.
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/19 10:50 PM
6

There's honestly a lot going on here... I'm not sure how to read all the wishy-washy, commitment-phobic level of investment, so I will just focus on the sex part. Your sex drive can't really be "too high," but it is important to choose someone with whom you are compatible. Sex also does not necessarily diminish significantly over time in a relationship. My husband & I still have sex at least once a day. I think your issue is that you want to show him you are attracted, which is great, but you're…
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/19 07:29 PM
4

He is a RPW Dream; a confident, supportive, and loving man who is by my side through thick and thin, and everyone aside from my family who knows of him wouldn’t imagine a better person for myself You really have no idea if any of this is true. It's so easy to idealize someone in the early stages of dating, & even more so from afar. Assuming you generally have a good relationship with your parents & they usually have your best interests at heart, I would advise you to really try to listen to what…
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/19 05:33 PM
6

I agree with you. I'd feel concerned as well. Last night, my husband & I stayed up until 2 in the morning drinking, smoking pot, & listening to music (like teenagers, IDK what we were thinking lol), but I still got up first thing & went to a board meeting. When I got home, he'd made breakfast, stripped the bed, & started a load of laundry... Like, we're idiots, but we're still responsible adults.
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/19 11:02 PM
3

That's cute... it reminds me of the first time we went on a trip, & I did the same things (best lingerie, heels, a dress...nice restaurant)... we were so tired that we fell asleep kissing & woke up at like 3am with all the lights on & me still wearing my shoes : )
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 03:56 PM
15

I grew up with a mother that taught me strong unconditional love Not exactly sure what this means to you, but you shouldn't love a boyfriend (especially one who can't tell you he loves you) unconditionally.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 06:55 AM
1

I'm marriage minded and I have chosen him as the man I want to marry. Have you told him your general timeline for marriage & kids (if you want them)? I think this is an important conversation to have. Ideally you would have vetted him very early for these questions. If not, now is not a great time, but you should do it sooner rather than later.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 06:51 AM
1

I didn't get this out of the OP -- what am I missing?
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 06:46 AM
5

Lingerie isn't an obligation for sex imo, sometimes I like to put some on just to feel sexy and good about myself I fully agree with your sentiment, & it used to be a lot more true for me when I wasn't married / living with him (since I wasn't cooking for him, & we were always going out for dinner or ordering in). We already have sex at least once a day, so if I put on lingerie, it can definitely come across as an "ask" or a bid for more sex or more affection, even if I don't mean it that way. T…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 06:35 AM
2

As the other commenter said, it really depends on the relationship & your preferences. I wear cute underwear all of the time, but maybe on a night where I'm in sweats welcoming him home, I would probably also wear a crop top & a his (current) favorite pair of panties. I don't usually wear a bra at home just because of my body type, but it's really down to your individual style & what you will feel good to wear + what he may like.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/19 06:22 AM
19

sorry, but YUCK. that sounds like extreme sexual incompatibility to me; for me it would be huge dealbreaker.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/19 05:47 PM
3

we've both been known to set up silly little tableaux with the stuffed toys.... I thought it was just us! that's hilarious
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 07:24 PM
7

I lost a lot of (female) friends because of his red pilling throughout the years What do you mean by this?
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 05:46 PM
15

I actually normally will not wear lingerie to "welcome home" if my husband has been traveling. I think it has the potential to create the sense of a burden or expectation, when he may be stressed & tired. I try to wear something cozy & home-like, but do my makeup a little sexy & wear some sparkly jewelry. Having dinner in the oven, making sure the house is neat, and making sure the washing machine is empty for his traveling clothes are the best things I have found : )
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/19 05:44 PM
2

Coming back here at the end of the day to clarify for you why I may be expressing myself so passionately here. It may sound to you like I am assuming a lot about your actions or intentions. My primary point is that you CAN stop this, & you CAN prevent this from happening in the future. There are a lot of excellent tips already in this thread that will help you. I've done what you're doing -- I was young (in college, at the end of my first relationship). I'd been dating someone for 3 years, but I…
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 08:10 AM
3

Can you send him letters or care packages? Maybe cute photos of what you're doing at home as well via text. I'm not a "sext" person (even being married -- I trust him, not the internet), but I'll send pics of flower arrangements (esp if he sent them to me), my mani/pedis, or body-only of a sexy outfit I am trying on
/r/RedPillWomen24/02/19 07:51 AM
4

You can't control other people; you can only control yourself. I would recommend you focus only on your actions & your responses rather than anything your coworker is doing. Focus on the projects & the work, tell him you don't need any candy but thank you for the kind offer; if he flirts, tell a flattering story about your fiancé. ​ Honestly, I'd advise you to tell your fiancé all of this & start looking for another job. You have "poisoned the well" with this particular coworker at this point. I…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/19 11:37 PM
1

I definitely agree that she should tell her fiancé.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/19 11:27 PM
8

I'm not insulting you. I'm trying to express how dangerous I think this problem could become for your relationship & your job.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/19 07:45 PM
5

Confessing feelings / attraction to her married coworker is pretty much the worst thing she could do here.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/19 07:11 PM
15

I'm sorry, but this is ridiculous. You didn't need to SAY anything to him about this. That's actually the most inappropriate part in my view. If you were going to say anything to anyone, you could have told your fiancé, "Wow, Paul & I are kind of getting Stockholm syndrome working together. Sometimes it feels like he's the only person who understands the struggles of sharpening pencils all day! I think I need to build a little space into our work relationship because I find myself spending too m…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/19 07:09 PM
16

Starting a fight with a coworker is just wildly unprofessional. I'm a little shocked that you would have such little control over your emotions. Of course it is common to develop small crushes here & there, but the correct way to handle it is to maintain your boundaries & hold space for your relationship in order to be a respectful partner. You've already become involved in an emotional affair in my view, & if I found out my husband had behaved like you have behaved, I would feel completely betr…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/19 06:47 PM
22

If a woman makes it easier for her man to lead and he is a natural leader with soft alpha qualities, he will naturally lead. This is how my marriage works. My husband would n e v e r relate to TRP advice / discussions.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/19 03:51 PM
6

Our mothers set us up!
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 07:02 PM
3

Are y'all still friends w/ the former neighbor?
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/19 06:44 PM
21

you can look great well into your 40’s One of the reasons I married my husband is because he notices & compliments beauty in women of ALL ages.
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/19 01:27 AM
32

my mother says, "treat your friends like family, & treat your family like friends." ​ essentially means: make friends feel "at home" & comfortable, & don't transgress normal social bounds (condescension, open criticism, lack of manners, etc.) with family
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 06:05 AM
1

We both work. I have more flexible hours, but he makes way more than I do. No outside help. He always kept a very tidy house as a bachelor, so I didn't worry about how our division of labor would fall out. I don't think either of us would refuse to do anything... Although I don't carry anything large out to the trash, & I prefer to be in charge of cleaning the bathroom. I cook most nights, but he'll cook if I want to do my nails. I do the dishes probably more than half the time, & he unloads & p…
/r/RedPillWomen04/02/19 03:54 PM
3

I hear you! That's very true -- & it's VERY attractive when someone refuses to put up with bad behavior. On the other hand, if I'm being good, my husband is more than welcome to put me up there on that pedestal!! I've got one built for him too : )
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 08:34 PM
4

I hear you -- 1 more thought before I run off to finish up my super bowl snacks... If someone was uncomfortable with dating more than 1 man at a time, it's possible still to "circular date" by making plans with yourself (going to a movie alone) or with friends -- the goal of the process is simply to take the focus off of ONE man who is not committed to you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 08:24 PM
7

LOL... I think I understand what you're saying or where your misgivings are coming from... but it sounds INCREDIBLY feminine to me to imagine a woman walking down a garden path with a gaggle of men behind her : )
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 08:16 PM
2

Even Scarlett O'Hara's comp did the same thing. Doesn't make you Rizzo from Grease Hahaha... totally agree
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 08:10 PM
6

I don't think it's very "feminine" to be competing with other women for a man who potentially has zero interest in committing to you.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 08:07 PM
5

making it no secret that you're going to dinner with another guy and both men being aware of that. I think this would be fairly rude. Just as it would be rude / a red flag for a man you were dating to casually mention sleeping with another girl the night before.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 08:04 PM
9

A point of clarification -- circular dating as a strategy is NOT a game, & the intention isn't to play up how "popular" you are or the fact you could get other dates. In fact, it's probably fairly rude to tell someone about the other people you're dating (& can come off either "cocky" as OP says, or extremely insecure). Of course a man, no matter how high-value they are, needs to hear how much you think of him if they are considering committing to you. However, being clingy or overly-attached be…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 07:52 PM
4

"putting men into a rotation" Put into action, this is less "plate spinning" than just "enjoying the company of gentlemen" -- it's actually very old-fashioned when you imagine that your grandmother may have had several different young men over the course of a week stop by for a glass of lemonade on the porch or gone dancing with a brother's friend without any expectation of commitment.
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 07:39 PM
1

I edited w/ a little more info. Everyone is different, but I know a LOT of women who have used circular dating as a tool to enjoy dating & find an amazing, committed partner. I am 1000% committed to my husband, but he gives me more attention & love than I could get by dating a bunch of men or using dating apps or posting selfies on Instagram or whatever : )
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 07:36 PM
7

And how do you aspect a girl to magically change her mindset once she enters a relationship? The thought behind this process is that you are fulfilling all your needs for fun, dates, masculine energy, from the men you are "circular dating" until ONE good man who is a good match "steps up" & begins fulfilling ALL of these energetic needs. At that point, he will offer you commitment, & you can choose to accept. ​ For example, my dating / masculine energy "needs" were: - A man to recommend new musi…
/r/RedPillWomen03/02/19 07:20 PM
3

This comment is so insightful -- we will all lose the things we once used to attract, but we all remain as we first were at our core
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/19 05:37 AM
7

I can only speak for myself, but when I was dating, I would always avoid the "hot, suave" dudes. In fact, the main reason I didn't think my now-husband was "marriage material" was because he was so hot. & actually, he was not marriage material when I met him -- neither of us were. I always aimed for "attractive to me," smart, & intellectually curious / interesting. That landed me good, good-looking men, though values not always aligned, which eventually ended the relationships. The worst relatio…
/r/RedPillWomen22/01/19 02:01 AM
6

Sorry, but this really gets me riled up -- I can't STAND IT when people say, "Everything is good except for the sex." Sex is the MAIN THING that makes it not just a friendship or co-working relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 08:13 PM
6

Well, to clarify, I don't think you have a marriage if you don't have sex.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 08:11 PM
7

If you marry someone with whom you are not sexually compatible, you have made a poor choice & failed to vet well. It drives me crazy that so many people do this!!!
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 08:04 PM
7

Why wouldn't I fxck my husband? We have sex at least 1x/day. I'm not sure how your comment relates to what I posted.
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 07:54 PM
22

I think there a few things in my marriage that keep my husband focused on me rather than other women: - His relationship models (parents, siblings, friends) are all monogamous, long-term, loving marriages. - We're building something (family, home) together -- so it enriches us for us both to pour our energy into the same vessel. - I do my best to support him as a lover, homemaker, & friend. - I'm only one person, yet I am a complex, multi-faceted individual (as we all are). I can't be another wo…
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 04:47 PM
5

Why are your commutes so long? Can you outsource things like grocery shopping & cleaning? IMHO, you both NEED to be finding some time to exercise / be healthy + spend time both with baby & time alone as a couple -- otherwise, what is the point of it all?
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 04:32 PM
2

adding on this to say -- you should feel comfortable when you are together & also when you are apart from him before you risk your total intimacy investment
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 03:17 AM
10

I definitely agree that -- regardless of the "genders" involved -- the energy of each partner needs to create a "push/pull" + "lead/assist" balance that creates both sexual tension + direction for the relationship goals
/r/RedPillWomen21/01/19 03:11 AM
2

My grandmother & I used to do this together all the time. Yours is very pretty <3
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/19 09:33 PM
2

Seconding the potato bar idea (mashed sounds so easy & delicious!) -- it's a FANTASTIC way to plan around any imaginable dietary restrictions, as there are enough toppings to cobble together a sufficient meal of any type.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/19 03:05 AM
1

if I can focus on the kitchen, and if the other girl can handle the rest of the hosting (greeting, getting people drinks, helping with seating) I highly suggest having your SO & another group member greeting people, making the bar self-serve, & getting your SO to lead on seating (including setting things up). You & a helper will still have your hands full dealing with the food alone IMHO.
/r/RedPillWomen20/01/19 03:03 AM
6

I hosted a party for 35 people last night. I paid for catering, used everything disposable, & hired someone to help greet, move food, serve drinks, etc. That's the only way I've been able to enjoy myself at a party like that. Your menu sounds good. I agree with others suggesting to hire dishes or use disposable. If you have the budget, definitely spend the money to hire someone to help you set up, serve, & clean.
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/19 09:33 PM
7

I don't have children, but when I was a nanny, I would do pajamas/teeth quite a while before bedtime (because it's a lot of activity that can get kids going again). Bedtime routine was potty, 2 books (1 they choose, 1 I choose; only 1 if it's long, & we both have to agree), then lights out, talk about what they want to dream about, & sing 2 lullabies (1st they choose, 2nd is always the same). I also didn't care if they didn't want to SLEEP, they just had to be quiet in their bed. If they wanted …
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 09:28 PM
1

You might like this thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/9mqeze/vetting_what_are_or_were_your_personal_deal/
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/19 06:11 AM
2

I personally LOVE to do some projects like this; however, I don't do them in front of my husband. Since doing things like this requires me to act from my "masculine" energy, I prefer to be alone & rule my domain as "man of the house" without any "competition" : )
/r/RedPillWomen08/01/19 08:16 PM
2

I'm not romantic with my friends; I do platonically kiss some friends. Do you mind clarifying your question here? I'm not getting it.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 07:40 AM
5

We have an excellent connection outside of the bedroom. Truly excellent. I apologize for being a little tactless here, but I have excellent connections with all of my friends & a few of my coworkers. Literally the main thing that distinguishes my husband from my other relationships is that we also want to share a bed & fxck each other.
/r/RedPillWomen06/01/19 02:39 AM
54

I have only seen him once. There is literally no reason to be this caught up with him. Which makes him feel even more special. Keep in mind that you aren't even thinking of the "real" him -- you are thinking about your fantasy-shaded, rose-colored half-memory blurred by "what could be" with "someone like him" on whom you have projected a ton of positive qualities he likely doesn't have : ) not being mean, just trying to make you feel better!
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/18 08:22 PM
7

I think it's pretty terrible that he doesn't see a reason to kiss outside of sex... especially if you only have sex <1x/week. That screams incompatibility to me.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/18 10:49 PM
7

I don’t get why women are marrying men that they don’t want to have sex with all the time. Same. This is a big issue that goes both ways. I'm so grateful I found someone with a similar libido to marry, but I wouldn't have married someone I wasn't very attracted to who didn't have a similar # sex/week ideal. I remember my first boyfriend saying ~3-4/week would be ideal; I said 5-10x/week, & he thought I was insane. In my marriage it's easily 10+/week.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/18 06:46 AM
2

Have you looked into your Kibbe type? I found that helpful to identify things that I liked but were also flattering + modern/classic... Like, I might love a flowy, floral maxi dress in a photo shoot... but is it good on me? No. The version that looks good on me is more a fitted solid-color dress with no jewelry + free-flowing hair + an interesting shoe.
/r/RedPillWomen13/12/18 06:26 AM
2

I have that book!! I re-did our closets last year, & it was amazing. Bless my husband, but whenever I wanted to get rid of something he kept saying, "Let's wait until we have something to replace it with" (!!!) -- so a lot of my "de-cluttering" & organization is limited to wrangling chaos & artfully arranging things : ) TBF, we'll likely move soon (bittersweet) & have a lot more space, so I'll be grateful for this later.
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/18 02:26 PM
2

verbal consent is bullshit and kills the mood. Normal people don't give verbal consent to sex. I totally get your point, but I want to offer up my experience. My husband & I literally speak verbally at almost every point during sex (do you want to kiss? do you have time to cuddle? do you want to lay down in the bed? can I take your pants off? can I put coconut oil on X? are you ready for sex? does this feel good? can you please do Y? stop Z, i'm too [whatever] to handle it.) We're super sexual (…
/r/RedPillWomen11/10/18 06:15 AM
3

It's pretty presumptuous to apply your kinks or fantasies as general rules : ) Additionally, a fantasy vs. wanting to do something are pretty different things. Sometimes I imagine that I would be quite a good actress -- & I'd really enjoy the "glamour" -- but, in reality, I don't want to travel so much or have such little control over my work schedule or privacy. At any rate, my husband is an extremely private person & very risk-averse. That being said, I do my best to ensure he is not missing o…
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/18 08:25 PM
15

I've dated 5 of them, including my husband... Other flags I missed that caused the end of the relationships that didn't last: - Too caught up in "winning" ("ambition" is often disguised insecurity) - Not ready for commitment (to anything -- relationship, job, city, etc.) - Put me on a pedestal / thought I was out of their "league" (caused them to try to get the upper hand in a power dynamic that was all in their head, which caused me to lose trust) - Different boundaries or definition of "ideal …
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/18 05:26 PM
9

Deal breakers included: - Never paid for sex or porn (I don't want a partner who has experienced sex in such a transactional way) - Either never wanted a threesome or had already had one & was over it (no one with "threesome" on a bucket list) - Not too active on social media (privacy is important to me) - Not an adrenaline junky (no skydiving, etc. -- it's "never enough" for some people) Must-haves: - Physically active & cognizant about nutrition (physical health -> mental health; men with pent…
/r/RedPillWomen09/10/18 04:29 PM
7

queen
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/18 05:29 AM
3

My husband couldn't get into that Joe Rogan, even though he's a fan-ish. I personally died at Ali Wong, Baby Cobra...
/r/RedPillWomen07/10/18 05:26 AM
6

Fine, I'll bite. I am politically "liberal," as is my husband. My husband would say he is a "feminist." I took a lot of Women's & Gender Studies classes in college & enjoyed the discourse, but ultimately found them to actually feel more disempowering than anything else. I don't believe in a binary concept of "gender," "femininity / masculinity," or "sexuality," but I believe there is merit in using adjectives to describe different types of energy. "Feminine" & "masculine" are widely accepted, th…
/r/RedPillWomen29/09/18 03:47 AM
1

Ah, yes. I found that now. Don't forget Jane Fonda -- Queen of my Heart. Cheers, hope you have a pleasant weekend.
/r/TheRedPill28/09/18 10:49 PM
1

I'm not really sure haha... I've always had an extremely high libido, to the point it was an issue in any relationship prior to my husband. He has a similar drive, & we live together, so... it happens : )) I think it's a sign we're compatible in that area, but I don't think that it means by itself that our relationship is necessarily healthy. However, I don't think either of us could be in a healthy relationship with anyone whose libido was significantly lower!
/r/RedPillWives28/09/18 10:13 PM
2

The Board of Directors of what / whom? I'm having a lot of trouble following your train of thought.
/r/TheRedPill28/09/18 10:10 PM
2

This is a very disingenuous argument. 1) She was a founder of ONE of the FIRST formal university programs, not the founder of the area of study. In fact, there is no mention of her AT ALL on the "Gender studies" wikipedia page. 2) What you are suggesting is the equivalent of saying, "X person founded the study of Economics; therefore, everyone who studies Economics agrees with the opinions of X," which is patently absurd.
/r/TheRedPill28/09/18 08:14 PM
7

I always think it's a bit of a red flag if I notice myself applying more makeup more frequently (beyond just normal, "let me try a trend" experiments), because it signals to me that I'm feeling insecure, even if I may not be explicitly aware of it, & that can be a warning signal for drama to come.
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/18 03:42 PM
2

Not on reddit (& not public)
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 03:12 PM
2

I got the non-hormonal copper IUD. Mini-rant: I worry that a possible reason people divorce after pregnancy / a child is that they "fell in love" with a hormone/pheromone profile that was influenced by birth control, so I started intentionally dating with NO hormonal anything to hopefully find a good, natural "chemistry." I love my IUD & had a pretty good experience. I had my mother take me & drive me home, & I spent the rest of the day in bed. My now-husband brought me enough soup & crackers to…
/r/RedPillWives19/09/18 02:51 PM
1

Fair -- but I would probably be saying, "Yikes!" & gossiping with my husband about it
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 05:45 AM
38

who can't live without book clubs and "girls night" on the regular. So many of my friends think they're going me a "favor" inviting me for a weekend without my husband... Like, sometimes the juice is worth the squeeze, but mostly... Why??? I don't want to fxck any my friends, & none of my friends are as loyal/kind a friend as my husband, so it is a sacrifice for me to give up time with him!
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 05:42 AM
21

I felt so sad seeing a thread in another group that I enjoy... asking all the women to share why they hxte men & how men are very bad. This sounds like propaganda, & I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it sprout up before my eyes... The complaints are semi-legitimate (men not bathing [?!?], being disrespectful, etc.) but they ignore the HUGE number of very good men that are out there doing their very best to support their partners & their families.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 05:15 AM
1

I've always said that I am "so liberal that I'm conservative, & so conservative that I am liberal" -- politically I lean very much to the left, but I know I could easily get into a dramatic argument with pretty much anyone. My husband is very left-leaning, so I just let him know my views without pushing anything. My brother is SUPER right-leaning, & he knows I don't agree with him on almost anything (except his amazing taste in 70s punk-metal & a general love of kindness/respect). It's easier fo…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/18 03:29 AM
3

Or volunteering
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/18 05:05 PM
3

Nobody would dispute that a high-ranking politician, a world-renowned actor, or a CEO of a multi-million dollar company are high-value men. I mean... not to be a contrarian, but I would not touch those men with a 20-foot pole. This is because of overinflated egos & a lack of energy bandwidth to give me the attention & quality time that brings me happiness in a relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen18/09/18 04:59 PM
–

I told my husband that I want a baby soon, & he loved it & was super cute about it! I thought it might make him worry / feel pressure about "providing," but he took it completely in stride. Also, I re-learned how to eat lettuce. I have been enjoying a big pile of plain greens first thing in the day & have easily lost an inch in my waist that was stubbornly sticking around. Caused me to accidentally meet a goal that, upon reaching it, I realized I never planned to accomplish. This made me wonder …
/r/RedPillWomen15/09/18 05:29 PM
2

Very good points -- thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/18 02:21 PM
5

Isn't it sort of a pre-vetted thing? Like seeing a highly-rated product on Amazon, if a seemingly high-value lady approves of X man, then you are saving them time on figuring out if he is good enough to "buy"?
/r/RedPillWomen06/09/18 06:05 AM
1

We did pre-marital counseling, but I wonder if people do pre-pregnancy counseling... I plan to do it for myself & my family as a mental / emotional tune-up but feel curious about anyone else's experiences!
/r/RedPillWives02/07/18 04:09 AM
1

I would really like to do training to become an end-of-life doula eventually. I feel curious how you chose your program!
/r/RedPillWives15/06/18 04:02 PM
1

Are you good at organizing a home and storage? You could offer to organize people's closets, garages, pantries, home offices, etc. I am good at this, & I would love to do this for people... Any tips on how I could get started? I have trouble when it comes to thinking about "marketing" myself : )
/r/RedPillWives15/06/18 03:54 PM
1

I have an immersion blender, but I have never used it! Maybe once, actually, to make a cold cream. But never for cooking food... Any tips for favorite uses?
/r/RedPillWives15/06/18 03:21 PM
1

I was having this same conversation with my mother & my MIL recently, & they thought it was so funny that I absolutely can't live without a head of cabbage in my fridge! I almost always have a bowl of sliced veggies prepared: cabbage, onion, jalapeños, tomatoes. It makes almost anything better to throw a handful on top.
/r/RedPillWives15/06/18 03:19 PM
1

I finally got my starter to live longer than a couple days, & I think I'm getting a "feel" for how to care for it : )
/r/RedPillWives15/06/18 03:00 PM
3

Hello! I've been lurking here, but I have never really participated : ) I'm married to my wonderful husband. We got together after a couple years of our mothers trying to play matchmaker... Thanks, mom! I'm new to my 30s, & my husband is moving toward his mid-late 30s. His background is in sales while mine is in marketing, so we share some similar vocabulary & are each familiar with the goals of the other, but we also each respect the different approaches the other might take in a given situatio…
/r/RedPillWives15/06/18 03:15 AM
2

Yes!! I ended up buying 3 new suits, & they all are very cheeky-thong ruched bottoms w/ varying top styles : ) That ruched style is everything... So comfortable & flattering! I will absolutely order one of those sequin suits from doll.com for my next trip. This one is so dreamy. Thank you for the hot tip!
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 01:38 AM
2

Is he working out regularly?
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 01:26 AM
9

Copy-pasting from my comment on a very similar recent post... In terms of "politeness," like "please & thank-you" variety -- I ALWAYS say please, thank you, excuse me, & so on to my husband. My mother taught me, "Treat your family like friends & your friends like family." To me this means: You should be on your "best behavior" with your family; they are the ones who will be there for you regardless, so treat them like gold It's easy to "drop" adherence to "rules" around social norms when you are…
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 03:40 AM
1

Also beautiful that you mention driving... my husband is truly the best driver I've ever known, & I honestly weighed that very heavily when I decided to marry him. Also nice to be reminded to take over when told to do so -- that is something I can be prone (pun intended?) to avoiding : ) Cheers, & thanks again! What a fun & valuable contribution!!
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 03:25 AM
1

Dreamy!! The 2 of cups is "my" card : ) Thank you so much!
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/18 03:30 PM
2

I love tarot!! I'd like to ask for guidance on making graceful transitions during some big changes coming up in the next 6-18 months.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 07:13 PM
1

I am super into it and always feel horrible for the women I see in home decor stores with spouses giving opposite opinions, arguing and spatting it out in the aisles. Same -- & I really appreciate that my husband "trusts my vision" when it comes to all things organizational / interior decorating. I also suspect that often when this happens, it is not necessarily "about" the paint color / picture frame / pillow firmness...
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 06:21 PM
1

I love to decorate & optimize our space! My husband really appreciates what I do & considers it a big value to him, & he gives me free reign over those decisions. Our walls are mostly decorated with large abstract paintings. I decorated my husband's office with pictures of family : ) Usually when I style a room or an area of our home, I balance by having "masculine" base styles (e.g. strong lines for furniture, neutral colors or simple, bold patterns for large pieces or fabrics) & adding subtle …
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 05:49 PM
3

I've been on a bit of a kick lately... - I've been tracking everything I do fitness-wise in a spreadsheet, & tallying weekly totals for each activity for comparison. I did it so could look back & remember, but the big advantage is that I've found it's impossible to write "nothing" 2 days in a row, so I am finding it easy to stay motivated each day. - I've been drawing a lot more. This pleases my husband, & I stay so relaxed & curious about life when I keep this energy outlet open. - I've given m…
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 03:35 PM
1

How clean did he keep his home prior to you marrying him? Also, are there other things you could off-load that he could help with that would make your life easier? Like if he handled the grocery shopping or similar?
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/18 05:28 PM
2

Thanks again -- this comment helped me so much. I honestly didn't know what that cheeky "Brazilian" cut was called, but knowing that term made my shopping so efficient!! I'll definitely look for "thong" styles online as well : )
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/18 01:09 AM
4

I would say, "It depends..." -- as an anecdotal example where a "disability" is handled in a way that comes across as very attractive, Auralee in the show Seeking Sister Wife has a lisp which she jokingly tells people is a Danish accent. It makes her seem (to me): fun, creative, humble, poised, & interesting.
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 05:09 PM
2

Thank you for your input!! My last suit (my "slutty" honeymoon suit) was from Zaful : ) I'm relieved to hear the consensus that teeny bottoms will be appropriate -- I think full-coverage bottoms feel like diapers! This will only be my second beachy trip with just my husband (I usually dress more conservatively around our families), & our first was to a completely private beach, so I didn't wear much of anything at all.
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 06:51 PM
1

Thank you so much -- excellent tips!!
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 02:04 AM
1

Note that Brazilian cut bikinis are incredibly popular in Hawaii and are not considered scandalous Thank you! I appreciate your suggestion & encouragement. I'm considering this my "permission slip" : ) Also, I just checked, & the shop I usually go to for swimwear carries that designer!!
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 02:00 AM
2

Awesome -- I would love good hiking recommendations if you have any!! We're going to the Big Island, & we'll be staying up around Kona. I have been to this island a fair amount as well, but usually golf / tennis / running for sport; my husband has gotten me way into hiking, however, so I know we want to focus on that as our main activity.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:16 PM
1

How cute are those models?! I love that they are smiling in many of the pictures.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:12 PM
2

It is worth it for me. Another factor I consider is ease & time spent -- I can go there for an afternoon & pick up 4 or 5 things that will take me through an entire season of events, & their styles range from daytime/casual, through evening or even gala.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 04:41 PM
4

I have always had success at Anthropologie. Not everything there is my style, but I can reliably find something that fits my preferences or need. I've ordered from ModCloth in the past, but ended up giving the dresses away because the fit was not quite right. I thought the quality was just ok -- one felt a little like a cheesy bridesmaid dress, & the other had some detailing that had a weird texture. I suppose the best way to describe it was the garments felt more like costumes than pieces creat…
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 02:46 PM
7

When I was single, I had women trying to set me up with their sons... who already had girlfriends. I had to demonstrate over months & years to my MIL that I was an acceptable match for her son. I understand "the fear," & I really empathize with mothers who have done a great job raising amazing men who want to make sure their sons are marrying women who can be good wives rather than simply marrying girls who are good self-promoters.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 03:32 AM
1

I realize this is too late to be helpful, but I just came across this guide for cooking for crowds & wanted to share it : ) Hope you had a fun & easy time hosting the family reunion!!
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 05:54 PM
3

I've always loved studying gender / sexuality & the language around both. I feel there are some MAJOR gaps in most discussions around these issues; this sub fills a "gap" for me, although I don't feel that it's in any way all-encompassing.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 03:54 AM
2

Sounds delicious!! I bet that would be good with a splash of gin in it as well for a refreshing summer cocktail : )
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/18 02:01 AM
3

My goals for the month: - Reduce waist by .5in - Learn 1 new recipe / week - Read a little (in print, not digital) every day - Write/draw in journal every day - Make a music playlist of my all-time favorite songs - Start a homemaking binder
/r/RedPillWomen03/06/18 01:59 AM
6

I am not quite picking up on the tone of this comment, but I was actually suggesting the complete opposite: that she might find a good balance (socioeconomic, cultural, & values) in a self-made craftsman.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 04:40 PM
5

My favorite "secret ingredient" is a lavender vanilla sugar (I'll replace maybe ~1/10th of the overall sugar in a basic recipe). It gives "boring" things like waffles / donuts / white cake a subtle elevation that feels fancy, & it smells complex & compelling while baking.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 02:44 PM
19

I dated someone with a very similar background -- a well-traveled artist who came from an extremely wealthy family of working-class immigrants with traditional values. I don't have "advice" per se, but I can tell you what worked for him (he is in a very good relationship now): he met a young woman who was from the same country, who had grown up in a rural area but was "discovered" & ended up traveling all over the world as a model. As a result, she shares his working class background & cultural …
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 09:46 PM
5

I think the best way to "vet" this early on is to listen very carefully to what he says & observe very closely what he does. There is no need to prepare specific questions in advance, etc. Often people will tell you or show you exactly who they are.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 06:17 PM
1

Also, her eye makeup is horrendous in that photo
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 05:33 AM
9

Since I was about 14yo, I've always personally believed that "women" (not "girls") peak at ~31 & can maintain that as long as they choose to maintain it. I draw my inspiration from Jane Fonda & my mother. I've seen super sexy pictures of my mother ages 16-now, & my personal favorite is when she was around 41. My parents' entire friend group makes fun of them because they cannot keep their hands off each other, & they are in their 60s (my mother is ~5 years older than my dad, for anyone curious).
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 05:21 AM
2

passive dread Yes... this is perfect, & this is the best way to describe why -- while my husband is out of town for a couple days -- I have been incredibly busy practicing my art, baking, making fresh pasta, working on my skin & body, cleaning & tidying... Because by being so amazing & setting the standards so high, he passively encourages me to meet the bar he sets just by being himself. So good, so lovely <3
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 05:03 AM
1

Ok, I misunderstood your post about the bag hanging around. If the balance you both agree to works for you, then all is good
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 04:52 AM
3

You are already taking his trash out, & you don't live together, so I would not expect that to change. What does "man stuff" mean for you? Also, do you work / would you plan to work after marriage?
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 02:45 AM
2

Oh yeah, ok, I remember a little about your story... I suppose you just have to keep a close eye on the issues that caused your breakup previously to make sure they are really resolved. The other thing is that I would want to tell the bf that you need him to step up when it comes to chores, etc. before you commit to sharing space with him, because I wouldn't want to train a man how to be responsible or move in with someone who maintained "bachelor pad" standards of cleanliness or repeatedly dism…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 09:46 PM
2

Agree with all of this, & I want to add that religion / culture can play into this, where people who are opposed to living together prior to marriage can also be more stridently opposed to divorce.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 09:22 PM
8

It sounds like you might be getting ahead of yourself a little bit to me... You are planning 3 years out (1 year to move in, 1 to get engaged, 1 to get married) for someone you have only been dating 6 months. If I were you, I would first want to focus on vetting to ensure this person would make a suitable husband. I wouldn't consider someone fully "vetted" until I had been with them for a year (the "Four Seasons Rule"). Otherwise, I would be afraid of fantasizing too much & projecting an "ideal"…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 07:06 PM
1

How long have you already been dating?
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 06:25 PM
4

I agreed to move in with my husband with the understanding that I wanted to be engaged within a year of moving in & married within a year of engagement. He proposed after 6 months living together, & we were married less than 6 months after that. My husband would not have married me without living together first, & I would not have lived with him without a timeline to get engaged & married. The "timeline" conversation is one we have been having throughout our relationship -- & we continue to have…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 06:18 PM
2

Could you include ages? I think that would be helpful context.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 06:16 AM
9

Oh MY GOSH. I did the same thing years ago, so I know exactly how you feel. I even got ugly, chunky highlights in it... Then I made it so much worse by trying to get the highlights out by dying it platinum blonde in my dorm room, which turned my hair fluorescent orange. I then had to go back to a different salon to get my hair dyed a brown color to cover the orange. I was so traumatized, I literally emailed all my professors that I was having a personal crisis & got on a plane to meet my mother …
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/18 06:49 PM
4

My husband remembers what we are doing / where we are going, reminds me; & then I can do the warm touches (dress code, gifts, wrapping, cooking appetizers or desserts). He buys & writes cards for his friends / family; I do it for mine. He replenishes all the toiletries / groceries so I can just go into store closets when I need something, cooks dinner if I have a big day or want to go to a dance class... He does most of the laundry & trash things, while I clean & keep things tidy & attractively …
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/18 03:43 AM
2

I was pointed here (to RPW) after posting on TRP about my husband not being an "Alpha," yet still being fully amazing & the best person ever. The sidebar post which listed out these red & green flags is the post that made me stick around & subscribe to RPW. I think my husband is 100% dreamy with all the green flags & none of the red. My one complaint is that it can be annoying sometimes to feel like I am living with someone really close to perfect, while I am painfully aware of my own shortcomin…
/r/RedPillWomen23/05/18 04:37 PM
1

nail polish smells awful and nail polish remover is even worse. My husband LOVES the smell of both : ) If you give your nails a break every couple of months, you won't damage your nails either.
/r/RedPillWomen23/05/18 03:52 PM
11

I do my nails at home every week. I do an almond nail shape I have this same routine! My husband has a "thing" for nails, so I usually have him choose my colors. His favorite go-to is dark (brown/gray/black) on toes & white on fingers, but he likes any colors really. I put sparkles on different fingernails, depending on my goals for the week (pinky = boundaries, ring = commitment, middle = power, pointer = direction, thumb = nurturing).
/r/RedPillWomen23/05/18 01:17 AM
0

He works out a lot
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/18 06:03 PM
1

Do you enjoy sex yourself, or do you view it as something you are doing "for" him? You mentioned tantrums in another comment... does he really throw a "tantrum" if you are not up for sex? That would be a huuuuuge turnoff for me & possibly a red flag, particularly since you have not been dating him for very long. My husband & I have been having sex that frequently for years. I know the soreness you're talking about, but whenever that's happened to me it hasn't bothered me much.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/18 05:14 PM
3

I agree. & even if soreness is an issue, it's not like PIV / penetrative sex is the only way to fulfill your partner.
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/18 02:57 PM
7

Am I being unreasonable? No -- you are not unreasonable in not wanting to have as much sex. However, I do feel a little curious about your attitude around sex in general. You say that hearing he masturbated multiple times per day "disturbed" you, & you say you are a "peaceful" person as a reason you cannot imagine keeping up with his libido. I wonder if you have some negative attitudes about sexual activities that could be coloring your perception of this situation. Are there women who can happi…
/r/RedPillWomen22/05/18 02:52 PM
3

Right, but if the captain is impaired is up to the first mate to keep the ship on course. As with any situation, I'm sure there were multiple ways to handle this well. He wasn't at full capacity perhaps, but he wasn't critically "impaired." We weren't lost or in danger, & the "mile out of the way" was to go to a shop, not an accident. I made a decision to just let him walk in peace, rather than suggesting a change in what he was doing (which, given his state of mind, could have easily felt like …
/r/RedPillWomen20/05/18 06:29 PM
5

how difficult it is for a woman to act against some her urges to needle or nag a man when he is down. This is the part that is so heartbreaking... it would be easy (almost intuitive) to do this -- but this is the exact thing that would make him feel like he is failing on all fronts (even when I, as his partner, see how absolutely invaluable he is -- how incredible, amazing, & impressive he is in all ways). So it requires a little bit of extra work, but I will make sure he knows I think he is the…
/r/RedPillWomen20/05/18 05:46 AM
4

We just took a longer walk that day. No problem : )
/r/RedPillWomen20/05/18 04:57 AM
3

Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen20/05/18 04:55 AM
3

Can't you give the boys chores to help with cooking prep, clean-up, & laundry? An 18-yo should learn to do things like that for himself, & older children should contribute to the family IMHO. Not sure I'm clear on your concern about the older one getting up & leaving the house, & you not being able to stop him. An adult child should be fully within their rights to leave the house; although you & your fiancé should set up "house rules" such as curfew / having guests over / etc. Regarding costs, w…
/r/RedPillWomen18/05/18 02:27 PM
2

Same!! Life is a journey
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 05:46 AM
6

This is something I love & return to again & again: 13 charms of a lady -- Love Growth Humility Patience Poise Sincerity Adjustability Joy & Enthusiasm Creativity Loyalty Responsibility Sharing Courage
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 05:40 AM
2

I ended up English / Creative Writing. "I'm so liberal that I'm conservative, & I'm so conservative that I'm liberal." Try this, honestly. It's a non-answer answer, but everyone kind of knows what you mean. It only opens conversations; it doesn't shut anything down.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 05:26 AM
3

If you love & trust your friends / family, tell them you want to find a husband & ask them if they know anyone. Ask from your best heart (not desperate, not pessimistic).
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 05:22 AM
3

Same, same... I actually initially submitted my major as "Women's & Gender Studies" (in which I'm obviously still interested...), after applying as a Math & Spanish double major...Who cares what I ended up studying (this was years ago). What I always tell people know when I get into conversations about this is, "I'm so liberal that I'm conservative, & I'm so conservative that I'm liberal." I somehow live on the polar opposite of the accepted "moderate" position. Quick edit: all my friends, when …
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 05:18 AM
19

My main advice would be: don't let yourself go to anger; don't build that as a default path. A lot of feminist/SJW messaging is designed to make you feel angry & antagonistic. There's no need for that. Observe what is true for you, take it in as "data" points, & make decisions from that perspective. Emotions are an amazing superpower that women have, but don't let them be used by other people to make you feel inferior / less-than / trodden-upon.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 04:09 AM
5

I have 2 situations that have worked for me specifically: - A friendship that was shared between myself & 2 male friends in which we were a collective friend group. We did hang out 1-on-1 in any combination, but we all knew & constantly confirmed that our friendship was like 3 siblings. It is actually one of the most fun/innocent friendships I've ever experienced. - My very good friend is gay (I've known him for 15 years & he is the gayest of gay on the spectrum). His partner (of nearly 10 years…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/18 01:47 AM
18

Chrissy Teigen & (despite popular opinion) Kim Kardashian
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/18 06:51 PM
3

My mother has often told me that when you criticize a man, you cause him to feel shame; not wanting to cause my husband to feel shamed by me is incentive enough for me to not want to nag or criticize. Of course sometimes you have to "say something," but instead of saying, "Why haven't you... When will you finally... Please don't..." you can say something more like, "I'm starting to feel a little concerned about... I really want... Can we talk soon & come up with a strategy to accomplish..." If y…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/18 07:04 PM
11

I agree that premarital counseling is so important. The pastor who married us actually had us fill out a survey separately & then went over the questions where our answers did not line up, which I thought was very efficient of her! We really enjoyed our sessions, & it helped cement my feelings of comfort & confidence regarding our decision to marry.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/18 01:24 AM
3

it's nice to have things that are "just ours." Similarly, yet the opposite, my husband is the only one who ever sees me completely done-up at "100%" : )
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/18 02:55 PM
2

[D]oes this get in the way of how attractive your partner perceives you to be in an LTR, when it is unrealistic to be wearing makeup all the time? I don't think so. Unless you go from 0-60 & back again, I think most men will barely register the changes. What steps have you taken to feel more confident with your bare face with your partner, imperfections and all? One of my dear friends who is very feminine & has great advice once told me that when she gets a blemish, she imagines that it is a bea…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/18 02:53 PM
4

the correct answer. I disagree; & I fear the path you are sending her down is a dangerous one. My feeling is that she would be better served by surrounding herself with good women rather than putting herself at the mercy of men who are simply more head strong than she is. Good women can assist her in becoming more respectful in social situations & can teach her what to look for in a good man. They may even be able to introduce her to an age-appropriate good man who has been raised well; this wou…
/r/RedPillWomen27/04/18 03:56 PM
2

Do you have older women you look up to? Possibly joining a volunteer organization & helping arrange fundraising events would be a good thing to do. You could learn entertaining / social skills, while also spending time around morally-minded people, working for a good cause & improving yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen27/04/18 03:43 PM
2

I do not think this is the best advice for someone who has such little experience. She is not in a position to "vet" as well, & she is likely to be taken advantage of looking for just, "someone significantly older" who actively works against her nature.
/r/RedPillWomen27/04/18 03:41 PM
1

The thing about dating a mutual or family friend is that, even if it doesn't work out, they likely will be very respectful of you, since their social reputation is on the line in addition to a potential relationship with you.
/r/RedPillWomen27/04/18 03:37 PM
2

I would tell your friends & family (those who you like, trust, & with whom you share values) that you want to find a good man (& that you want to [be married, have children -- whatever is true for you about your goals]) & ask them if they know anyone to whom they can provide an introduction.
/r/RedPillWomen27/04/18 01:25 AM
1

I totally hear that. I don't even think I want to go anymore, however, because I keep imagining him coming back to the hotel room, exhausted after a long day & a stuffy dinner where he has to be "on," still needing to open up his computer & send a few emails -- & me relaxing on the bed after a fun adventure, a massage, & a quiet evening out alone at a posh restaurant... it's just a little discordant haha. I think I'd prefer to wait until we can both enjoy being tourists together : )
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/18 09:22 PM
1

I'm very smiley & bubbly in general as well. My female friends have long told me that I greet strangers too often, etc. However, I actually think this level of friendliness can be a strong way to establish boundaries with people. It's similar to "not walking like a victim" (see this study about how psychopaths use gait to select a victim to target), & it's an inversion of RPW sexual strategy -- social dominance / taking control of the energetic exchange is (broadly speaking) a TURN OFF, while su…
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/18 05:50 PM
2

I don't see men approaching during the day as "creepy" either -- I don't find men approaching women creepy or alarming or disrespectful at all! I just don't want it to happen to me : )
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/18 05:43 PM
1

I don't tend to make eye contact with or smile at strangers in public, for example). A lot of times I get hit on when I'm quite visibly busy (running errands, rushing to not miss a bus, etc). I live in a very diverse urban city. I *do* make eye contact with & smile at strangers, even while "rushing." I actually think this is the best way to NOT get hit on. I have found that saying "hi" with verbal punctuation that simultaneously begins & ends a conversation is the best way to preemptively shut s…
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/18 05:42 PM
1

I suppose if it is becoming a problem for you or for your partner, that would be a scenario. More importantly, I think if other men are consistently approaching a woman while she is out with her man -- that should not be dismissed as "normal."
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/18 02:49 PM
2

I agree with the overall thrust of your comment; however, I get hit on a decent amount. Not a lot, but it does happen. This is not the "constantly hit on" complaint that my post was written to address. My intent was not to say, "If you are getting hit on, you are 'asking for it,'" -- rather, that if a woman (or her partner) is complaining of being "constantly hit on," that there are things in her control that she can do to be more socially communicative about the type of energy she wants to rece…
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/18 02:26 PM
1

Thank you -- it "hurt" a little for me to "handle" this situation on my own -- but, like I said, my sweet husband is already STRESSED out to the max, so I feel really grateful I was able to process my feelings through my own strength & not "take it out" on him. I realize now that, if it was truly an opportunity for me or for us to have fun, he would have taken that lead. There was no reason for me to even "suggest" that I come along in the first place; that was actually my specific "error" here.…
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/18 03:48 AM
1

Very thoughtful men may look at statistics such as the impact of premarital sex partners and it's impact on divorce rate, and decide that only virgins are marriage material. Depending on their libidos, thoughtful men may also consider the impact of a dead bedroom on a relationship before hitching their wagons to exclusively virginal women.
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/18 08:13 PM
1

Some people said artificial insemination would be the end of men
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/18 07:50 PM
12

This is definitely more of a "thought-crime"... But it's really been stressing me out. My husband has a 2-part business trip; 1 he is doing now, 2 is in a month or so, but it's somewhere much more interesting... I really want to visit that city, so I suggested I could come along! At first, he said, "That would be fun, but what about X?" So I "solved" X. Now he is saying, "Well, but what about Y?" I, personally, don't see Y as a problem, & it felt more like an excuse for me not to come. I just "d…
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/18 07:06 PM
5

For me, this has nothing to do with politics or prescriptive philosophy -- it's not even about what is "natural." It's simply what, in my experience, WORKS to create a happy, mutually-fulfilling relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen24/04/18 06:44 PM
1

I keep thinking about this question you asked me -- it's interesting, & I don't really know the answer! I want to say that it was clear in conversation before we actually "dated" that we were very different, but in a very compatible & complementary way. We were "aligned" in values & perspectives, yet "divergent" in the paths we might take or solutions we might adopt individually. It also strikes me that, though many say "nothing changes" after the wedding day (& my husband is one of these people…
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 06:14 PM
5

I totally agree with you & feel unclear what people are disagreeing with here, as you stated, "Top 1% guys is where you see the greatest variance in tastes." To me, it sounds like the people who are "disagreeing" are actually making a similar point. To speak to your second paragraph, the "1%" men I know would be mortified to bring home a woman who was overly-sexy, age-inappropriate, uneducated -- or, more importantly, uncultured or with poor etiquette skills -- regardless of how beautiful or kin…
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 05:49 PM
4

I have never told my husband anything about my sexual history, & I know nothing about his. We agreed early on "what's done is done" & was not relevant to our current relationship. We did discuss - high-level - when & for how long our "serious" relationships had been. Aside from that, I only bring it up if someone from my past contacts me (to get his help with my response), or - very rarely - I will mention a particular (abusive) relationship, only to give context to how I am feeling in a situati…
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/18 02:28 PM
1

Physical "requirements" are odd (& personal, & derive from your individual world of "symbology")... but I would encourage you to feel open to anything! I used to feel "opposed" to very "ripped" guys, because I had an assumption it was an indicator of "self-involvement" or vanity. When I saw my now-husband shirtless for the first time, I felt so scared. I had always dated "athletic" but not "built" men... Turns out, his body (super-jacked) is a result of emotional & intellectual discipline, not a…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 04:59 AM
6

He helps me open bottles (they're very hard to open, I swear!) WTF is up with this?!? I strained my wrist trying to open a jar of salsa... Later googled & found that one poor woman had tried to sue a food company after enduring 10s of thousands of surgery + time out of work after tearing tendons trying to open a jar! I went to my now-husband's house when we had only been dating like 2 months because I was determined to make my lunch with a jar of artichoke hearts... Be safe out there, ladies <3
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 04:22 AM
6

[W]hat specific strengths do you bring to the table that he lacks, and vice versa? I bring: Social nuance / etiquette insights Fun & laid-back spontaneity Curiosity & inspiration Quickness He brings: Charisma & social “power” Careful consideration & future-oriented planning Certainty & decisiveness Deliberation How, specifically, does your SO take advantage of the strengths you bring to the table as he leads your relationship? I am in charge of many “negotiations,” whereas he is in charge of one…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 04:15 AM
2

not having sex before commitment. In my mind, there is "fast-food" sex & there is "learning how to cook" sex (edit: obviously, there is a spectrum here...) -- if you have too much "fast-food," you will compromise your health & lifestyle; if you "learn how to cook," you will learn healthy habits that also benefit those around you. Most people will stop at a Taco Bell once or twice in their lifetime, but learning how to cook is an incredibly valuable skill that will serve you & your community for …
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/18 03:25 AM
2

Because marriage is a completely bad idea if you have a libido mismatch, or a husband who can't lead. I can't believe the number of people who marry or stay in relationships with mismatched libidos!! What a way to guarantee you will have a stressful, unsatisfying life.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/18 05:31 PM
6

I am not taking credit for the work he does; I am stating that his success at work is, in part, attributable to having a solid home foundation as a "base camp," a reason (a family) to strive to achieve even greater success, & a supportive wife who shores up his confidence that this greater success is indeed achievable. I may not be the one in the meetings, but I am the one who listens to him vent, cheers him on, follows the "office politics" stories & commiserates with him, re-reads an important…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/18 02:52 PM
4

We both work & have no children (yet). In general, he does anything that requires "strength" (money things, trash, buying groceries/supplies in bulk, putting dishes away, doing most of the laundry), while I do things that require "creativity" or are more detail-oriented (cooking, cleaning, organizing, making the bed up nicely, & making our house feel "home-y"). He cooks sometimes, I do the laundry sometimes, whatever. Neither of us really mind our "chores" at all. Before we first moved in togeth…
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/18 02:17 AM
1

hahaha...
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/18 02:34 PM
1

Do women really think abs and Muscles are default? No... I asked my husband VERY early on in our relationship if he was using steroids or HGH. Thankfully he was not, but he was flattered I asked lol
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/18 02:31 PM
5

In terms of "politeness," like "please & thank-you" variety -- I ALWAYS say please, thank you, excuse me, & so on to my husband. My mother taught me, "Treat your family like friends & your friends like family." To me this means: You should be on your "best behavior" with your family; they are the ones who will be there for you regardless, so treat them like gold It's easy to "drop" adherence to "rules" around social norms when you are around people 24/7; keep in mind, you are defining their "hom…
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/18 04:03 AM
5

"Flags" I would look for could include: Is there "space" for you in his life? Does he have the time/energy/love to fill your "relationship bucket" of needs? Does connecting with him make you feel expansive, like you are growing together, or do you feel you have to make yourself smaller so that he can "lead" the relationship? I want to be led by a man who is naturally strong enough to "hold space" for the most magnificent version of myself. Is he prepared to start his own family? Is he mature eno…
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/18 06:58 PM
13

To me, it makes sense that you would be vetting each other to some degree until you are engaged & plan to be married. I think it really takes about a year to "know" someone ("See a person go through all 4 seasons," is the advice I remember hearing).
/r/RedPillWomen10/04/18 03:10 PM
3

Make him wonder if you’re a bit slutty, then when he shows in his micro mannerisms that you toed the line, back down to nice girl immediately, if you can show embarrassment do so. Hahahaha... I do this with my husband!! Excellent way to maintain abundant energy & (positive) tension even in a relationship : )
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/18 10:38 PM
5

One thing that is so fun about being in a relationship is going on adventures or dates -- so take yourself on a nice date! Dress up pretty; call a car to pick you up; go out to dinner at a restaurant you've been wanting to try, or go see a movie! This is also very good for developing poise and social confidence.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/18 02:18 PM
2

Hi lady -- I want to come back to this exchange because I find myself still thinking about it. First of all, thank you for your response. It feels odd & a little scary to post a question "into the void" of the internet, & all responses feel interesting to receive. I value this space to connect with like-minded women, & I think it is a good place to "practice" communication. To that end, please "hear me kindly" with generosity toward my intentions : ) Reading the words you wrote felt bad to me. I…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/18 03:09 AM
2

Continue working towards being a soft place to land. Do you have a visual around this? I find it's very helpful for me when this opportunity arises (to be a soft place to land) that I imagine exactly what kind of place I am -- I am a warm beach off a jungle of Mexico with soft sand... very isolated... gorgeous estate & trees all around, but no people... with loud, crashing waves that sometimes become very quiet & peaceful -- exciting, but in a white-noise sort of way... also, there are many secr…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/18 01:49 AM
3

I don't want to get into that exchange really, but I will say that I was banned temporarily in TRP for the same violation -- you cannot announce your gender. This rule exists on RPW as well, but it seems to be much more lax here.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/18 01:32 AM
2

I’m all for being celibate, single, and waiting for the right one to come along. I hear what you are saying, but I want to caution you about "deciding" that someone is your person & that you cannot leave them because you have slept with them. It's a sunk-cost fallacy & could lead to you staying with the wrong person for too long or making an unsatisfying commitment to them.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/18 09:40 PM
30

This post called "Vetting for Alpha and Beta traits: Selecting the right mix for stable commitment" has good info on this topic: https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/4yrobj/vetting_a_man_part_3_alpha_and_beta_traits/?st=jflisfvs&sh=1442f86c I accidentally got banned in TRP (didn't follow the posting rules) when I tried to say my husband was not Alpha, & the guys there were like... ok, but your husband is NOT Beta -- & I agree. He is a good mix w/ all the Green Flags listed in that post…
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/18 08:10 PM
1

sorry!
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 09:17 PM
1

Is there an app for Strong Curves? I looked a while ago but couldn't find anything...
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 05:45 PM
1

Hey, hey! However, "all work is easy work" -- if you have the right mindset, everything "difficult" feels easy <3
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 03:03 AM
1

My friend just came over to teach me kettle bell swings, & we did a 50-40-30-20-10 w/ swings & squats -- it was THE MOST FUN, & we were both drenched & giggling at the end :D Thank you again for the idea <3
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 01:14 AM
1

sexy but natural Yasss, queen <3 thanks for the good tips!! Uphill walking is great; I'll do more of that... & I just started bringing a "heavy" resistance band to work & doing little leg sets in my chair -- the abductions killed me! So fun haha
/r/RedPillWomen02/04/18 06:27 PM
1

I did have one, but... honestly, my tastes/priorities have changed so much over the years, the only things very useful from it are some crystal champagne flutes & a couple of blankets.
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/18 03:24 PM
2

Thank you!!! Also, I just feel like quietly saying... I feel very slightly annoyed at the people who are responding thinking I have never seen a gym! I say I am not looking to lose weight & describe my routine in the OP... haha... this is not directed at "you" at all - just fyi - my reaction to this thread is .... "patient" & "very appreciative" :D cheers, hope you have a happy weekend!
/r/RedPillWomen31/03/18 03:36 AM
1

Pushups!!! I definitely thought you were telling me to wear push-up bras at first... haha... Thanks for your advice :D
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/18 03:03 PM
5

My husband would be annoyed if he gave me 2 options & I chose the less expensive one rather than choosing what I actually preferred -- I think you have to weigh being considerate of his $ with being authentic & honest.
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/18 12:14 AM
2

I personally feel that any behavior can be "feminine" or "masculine" -- just depending on your feelings or attitudes around the act. (Although, I'm not in love with those terms in this context, since I believe what I am saying... I'd prefer "pull" to describe 'feminine' & "push" to describe 'masculine' -- just describing my world, not prescribing a philosophy or terminology.)
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/18 02:52 AM
1

I "know" how to deadlift w/ a barbell but have never pushed myself much on weight -- I will have to watch some videos to make sure I understand squatting w/ a barbell, & I'll get my husband to help me try it out. & thank you for the progression calculator! You answered my question before I could ask <3
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/18 01:18 AM
2

Boho Beautiful Her hair... <3 Thank you! You're a gem -- this is all super <3
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/18 01:14 AM
2

Interesting...! My favorite dance class actually incorporates Tae Kwon Do into the routines -- I will see what's going on around me in terms of focused classes : )
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:16 PM
1

Thank you for the excellent, specific tips!! These are all great <3
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:15 PM
2

I love pilates!! Do you have suggestions for YouTube-ers? I have most of the equipment at home. I feel curious about your oil comment -- I actually increase my oil intake when I want to trim up! I've noticed my body can basically run on good fat, & it decreases my appetite when I have more of it : ) Every body is different, though... so interesting
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:38 AM
2

Interesting... I will have to experiment with this before I go "all-in" with it for the first time on a trip, but this is very good input. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:33 AM
1

This sounds very intimidating -- but I've just recruited one of my best friends who is very experienced in the gym to show me some skills, so hopefully she can help me understand this : )
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:31 AM
1

tighter this is the overall goal -- thank you... I think I will reduce my bread intake a bit. I eat sandwiches fairly regularly during the work-week, so I will identify some alternatives : )
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:30 AM
2

Thank you!! I don't eat fast food, & just a bit of sugar or pasta now & again, but bread is a thing I could reduce a bit more -- thanks for the advice <3
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 02:28 AM
1

Thank you! That does sound fun... & I appreciate the tip about slow + heavy as well! That also sounds fun. I feel so excited about these ideas!!! Do you have a "guru" or expert that is your favorite to follow?
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 12:40 AM
3

I have the Strong Curves book! I love it -- my current body-weight circuits are partly based on those ideas : ) Thank you for all these great tips!!! I really appreciate it.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 12:02 AM
3

Thanks for the reminder!! I got her ebook a million years ago & never even opened the file... checking it out now... : )
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 09:16 PM
10

I just mean "extra good" "extra nice" "extra beautiful" "extra sexy" I am not trying to change my body or "do anything" dramatic to it; just shine it up a little for a special occasion.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 08:55 PM
2

I love dancing - totally agree that it is a great intersection of intensity & grace <3
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 08:35 PM
2

I am not trying to lose weight, just look a little "extra" for my husband : )
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 08:34 PM
2

Thank you for the specifics. I have done both in the past but now just do lazy squat sets & no deadlifts recently -- do you have equipment preferences??
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 08:32 PM
6

Thank you - do you have a resource you would recommend for a routine?
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 08:30 PM
6

This "sounds" right to me - but my actual experience has been that the men I have attracted, especially my husband, can have a negative mood amplified by clutter or visual yuckiness. He is VERY appreciative that I make sure the house is extra-tidy when he is having a difficult week. Edit: & now that I am thinking about it, I prefer men who are like this; I was very attracted to my husband's habit of keeping a very clean home when he lived alone.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 03:10 PM
1

I got laser around the "edges" & I play around with different shapes/looks. Sometimes for holidays or vacations, I will use "flash tattoos" (the metallic ones) to make a pretty design.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 10:36 PM
2

princess ew. haha, yes, I "get" this more clearly - thanks
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/18 03:47 PM
-2

none are goddesses. I fundamentally disagree! We are all goddesses. That is the power-position that we hold. Whether or not you own your universe -- that is on each goddess to undertake. However, a true goddess will never seek to manipulate or control. I agree with you there.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/18 06:46 AM
2

I love this list. As for lacking advice about home-making (sex & cooking are parts of this) -- I feel that is built into being sensitive (being observant about your immediate world), playing, & giving
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/18 05:50 AM
8

He deserves that I try. What does "try" look like to you? To me that sounds like pushing or convincing, which is never worth the energetic output. He doesn't necessarily deserve anything from you right now. What you deserve from yourself is to make sure you are a whole, complete universe unto yourself. Build something in yourself that naturally invites people to enter -- & build gateways (vetting processes) that ensure those who are permitted to enter are worthy.
/r/RedPillWomen25/03/18 05:47 AM
4

you're just offering information about your current emotional state. I definitely agree with this & think it's key -- If you are sharing because you think he is wrong, think he acted against you, want him to do something different: you are pushing, attempting to control, manipulating, creating distance, turning off If you are sharing because you are opening your heart, showing him a secret garden, being vulnerable: you are inviting, being authentic, building trust, creating allure, attracting
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/18 01:58 PM
1

Thanks, beauty! That was exactly my goal -- to inspire a little bit of new juice
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/18 04:34 AM
3

My husband only had one previous relationship that lasted more than 6mo, & that was when he was in school. Other than that, he just dated around -- as one does when you are an otherwise-occupied, desirable man. I derive a lot of value from his amazing relationships with his sister & his mother. He prioritizes family, & he doesn't have deeply-embedded assumptions or conflict patterns. His father essentially (correctly) informed him that I was the best match he would ever find. Edit: I realize I s…
/r/RedPillWomen21/03/18 03:53 AM
2

This is the sweetest. I can barely read it -- it makes me cry! Thank you for sharing.
/r/RedPillWomen20/03/18 09:03 PM
2

When we got married, we prioritized our guests rather than ourselves, as the "reason" we had a wedding was to join our separate communities together & express our gratitude for their support of our commitment. We paid for everything for our wedding party (dresses, suits, mani/pedi/hair/makeup) & kept our "pre-wedding" as low-fuss & guest-centric as possible; for my bachelorette party I took a group out for drinks & dinner, & my husband did the same with his group. Everything happened on a single…
/r/RedPillWomen20/03/18 06:54 PM
2

Would he enjoy a massage after the kids go to bed?
/r/RedPillWomen19/03/18 06:42 PM
3

I would express how you feel about it: "I feel so proud of myself - I got so much done today! ... It feels so relaxing to have a clean kitchen, & I feel more excited for the weekend when our floors are freshly vacuumed!" If you are bringing it up in order to receive praise, it sounds manipulative, like you are trying to control the outcome or his words/actions.
/r/RedPillWomen16/03/18 06:25 PM
1

That link is v cute... pls pm me for sizing details? xx
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/18 03:26 AM
10

I generally sleep naked or in a very stretchy thong. The reason behind this is that I do not want to restrict my fascia (google "fasciology" to get more info; restricted fascia is what causes lines, dents, & cellulite). Your skin is the largest organ, & your fascia is one of the largest & most important body systems. "Wedding lingerie" or "bridal lingerie" will give you a wide variety of styles that are very comfortable, & you can choose based on your style. If it is cold where you live, conside…
/r/RedPillWomen15/03/18 03:24 AM
2

Are there any "tells" you can observe that come before he starts to "break"? I would try to observe a pattern & start to try to interrupt it. As it stands, you are essentially rewarding him when he becomes upset & possibly training him to be upset more often. You are also over-functioning, in the sense that you are trying to control the situation or make something happen by trying to change his mood or his feelings. You say you cannot move out - but can you not move yourself physically out of th…
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/18 07:29 PM
1

😘😘
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/18 02:30 PM
3

Sounds interesting! & it would feel good to be alt-omni; & rather than "queens," we are goddesses: we serve & inspire loyal, worthy Kings, but we create the world. This is where being heart-open & describing & pointing out the incredible wonderment of the world comes in: we with "pull" energy build the environment & ask the questions, while "push" energy suggests answers or solutions. This is an intricate, romantic dance that naturally creates tension, which results in passion & innovation
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/18 03:23 AM
1

Good luck! & don't beat yourself up about anything. We are all just "practicing" - no one ever gets to "perfect."
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 09:01 PM
2

Ok... so first of all, drop your expectations. You have an expectation right now that this conversation is going to be horrible & difficult, & he will be "mean," & you will have to stifle yourself. Just leave infinite space for anything to happen when you do connect. Before you talk with him, do your best to get yourself into an emotionally safe place: take a walk, have some tea, put on your favorite outfit. If you are meeting him in person, don't "dress to impress" - this is trying to control t…
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 08:32 PM
1

No matter what you are feeling, there is a way to express it that will bring him closer to you & build intimacy. If you riff it out, I can try to help you script it for yourself. You can actually put a script in your pocket & excuse yourself to review it in the bathroom when you feel you are going into "outburst" territory.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 07:25 PM
1

What are the feelings underneath the anger? What is the content of the outbursts? If you were expressing all this authentically, without censoring yourself, what would this sound like?
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 07:20 PM
8

I couldn't either. OP says she lost respect - & obviously trust is lost - how do you stay with someone you don't respect or trust?
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/18 04:23 PM
20

I love the story about your xmas gift that went above & beyond -- but I think it's totally chill to express if an occasion is important to you & what you want to receive. For example, I told my husband that valentine's day is SO important to me, & I live to get flowers on that day. I told him the colors & the florist I preferred. I also re-arranged those flowers + some extras when he arrived home from a trip recently. He was so impressed with the beauty that he was telling his parents tonight ho…
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/18 05:11 AM
1

Thank you <3
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/18 04:14 AM
9

I also love long dresses w/o a bra. It's very modest - while being totally revealing - & is a very comfy at-home look. Edit: I thought of a couple more... Cute aprons w/ a pair of panties while I cook is comfortable & attractive, but I'm not obviously bidding for sex, as I am busy cooking (but ofc I don't mind taking a break if something else comes up...). & my husband has bought a couple of short cotton + lace nighties for me that he calls "house dresses." I expressed a desire for "house dresse…
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/18 01:59 PM
2

I like Rori Raye's relationship advice.
/r/RedPillWomen09/03/18 06:07 PM
4

Many women are as sexually-charged or more so than the average man. Also, physical arousal for women is not visually obvious, so ofc we would not have an issue similar to the notorious outstanding-boner.
/r/TheRedPill02/03/18 02:37 AM
1

women are all horny sluts who can't control themselves You guys are idiots. The reason this stuff "works" is the same reason you think women are unilaterally "desperate" cock-hungry lunatics with wills made of malt-o-meal. By applying TRP blueprint, you are duplicating the same twisted results. "Like attracts like." Damaged, unhinged people with broken, dark perceptions of the world around them attract the same. You will never find a loving, committed partner, who would do anything for your happ…
/r/TheRedPill02/03/18 02:01 AM
1

OR be kind, supportive, hot body, financially successful, charismatic, great sense of humor, & socially awesome...? (sorry... IDK how I got on this post a month after the fact!)
/r/TheRedPill19/01/18 02:32 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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