So I just recently got out of a divorce in March in which my husband was a beta who treated me okay(read: Submitted to me and was unhappy, because even though I greeted him at the door and was the wife, I also always had to be right and thus we grew apart) and I let go of that marriage because he was too submissive and I wasn't going to be responsible for making him unhappy.

Fast forward to May: I begin dating a friend of mine who I've known for about 10 years. He has severe anxiety but otherwise has been an alpha on all accounts. The first month of this relationship was great. He knew what he wanted. He was always talking about being positive and improving himself. He had just gotten rid of his ex(that he broke up with 6 months before and had a son with 3 years ago who they gave up for adoption) who broke his stuff all the time and was hyper abusive. She drank at all hours of the day and constantly threatened to blackmail him, etc. And he had FINALLY gotten rid of her and moved on to me.

Or so I thought.

After the first month we were together, he began talking to her again because she found out he was with me and she broke into his apartment and refused to leave except to go to work. He didn't call the cops on her because he "felt bad". He subsequently moved in with a mutual friend of his and mine to get away from her. She was evicted shortly afterward. He still continued talking to her, though, despite all his big talk about getting her out of his life. He ignores her 85 percent of the time but then says he has to "calm her down" when she starts acting crazy(like when she saw us driving together and blocked us in our parking spot. He told her he was done with her that day, too, and yet still she remains.). When he messages her, he lashes out at me from anxiety over talking to her. I've broken up with him a few times over it. He hasn't left me once. In fact every time I break up with him he begs me to stay(even though all my friends now hate him for still talking to her). He says he loves me and not her and that she's just around because if he blocks her she'll come to his job or house or something. Yet since the last time we broke up we're not even friends on facebook(he deactivated without accepting my request) but he is friends with her and he follows her on instagram but not me. He checks my instagram every day to see what I'm doing. Sketchy.

After our most recent break up I found out he's begun picking her up from work to take her home one night or so a week. Supposedly this is in exchange for gas money but I saw an instagram picture from her IG with a picture of him in his boxers laying on his bed.

We were talking when that picture was taken. I didn't know he was even with her that day until the next day.

I confronted him about it and he says there is/was/hasn't been anything sexual going on and that he would tell me if there was. He says that if he wanted to sleep with her he'd just sleep with her and not me. He still spends ALMOST all his time off work with me. I have a key to his house that he gave me. He brings me food and picks me up from work when I ask also.

So TL;DR I'm sitting here thinking: All of these problems just came about when he started speaking to her again.

When he is not talking to her he is perfect. Respectable. Assertive. Infectious. Funny.

Should I believe they aren't sleeping together? Did I just become a plate and did she just become his main? Are we both plates? Or is he just looking for something in her that he hasn't found in me and do I need to adjust? Should I wait this out? Am I hamstering this? I need the RPW perspective and advice. Questions are welcome.

EDIT: I am EXTREMELY new to TRP philosophy so bear with me here, please.

EDIT2: Thank you guys for your input. I guess I know the truth but it's a tough thing to acknowledge.

FINAL UPDATE: He is gone. He made one last ditch effort saying he was going to go tell her he was done with her for good and then come over. He ended up staying the night at her house instead and ignoring me. So, I blocked him on everything and am now going to a concert tonight. Everything is going to be far better without worrying over him and I appreciate everyone here who reassured me that I was correct in my assertions that he was not worth staying around for.