So I've been frequenting this sub for quite a while now and have really learned a lot from you ladies. Now I'm a little stuck in my relationship and trying to decide where to go from here. Bear with me if I leave anything out, I'm typing from my phone so I couldn't seem to copy/paste the questions from side bar. So I'll just give some background and try and cover everything.

Basically I've been dating this man for about 5 months now. Things have been amazing for the most part. He's the kind of personality I look for, dominant, funny, caring, generous etc. He does so much for me and I've honestly felt blessed to have someone like him in my life. I've been going through a rough time and have been trying to stabilize my life and he's been wonderful and patient with me.

Now for the problem... This requires a little background on things. A few months into the relationship, he had gone out to a show at a club. He didn't invite me to it at the time, as he said.. It was a guys night. His friend had been travelling in Europe for a while and they hadn't gone to a show in a long time. I had plans, but either way I'd assumed that was the situation and never bothered him about it. At this time things had really been feeling good between us. We saw each other frequently and spent a lot of time together. Talked frequently as well. My only issue was that at this time we hadn't really established what we were, and while he was seeming very committed it felt like a lot of the relationship was sexual to him. A couple weeks after this show, he forgot his phone at my place when he left. I know I shouldn't have done this, but I looked. I eventually came across a text from what I first mistook as a male name, then as I was reading, I realized the conversation was extremely sexual and went on for quite a while. So when he buzzed up to retrieve his phone, I confronted him. I was extremely shaken by it because I felt rather blindsided. He more or less begged me to stay with him, promised it was nothing. Turns out he had met up with her at the show, she was someone he had feelings for in high school. He didn't expect to see her there apparently. When he dropped her off at her place with some of his friends, she kissed him and that's when it started. So it had been going on for a couple weeks.

I did a lot of thinking and accepted the fact that we hadn't established our commitment, although it had seemed implied based off prior conversations. But he seemed sincere in wanting to fix things and move on. So we did. He told me he deleted his dating website app etc, blocked the girls number and we worked on it. It was rough and I made mistakes through this time I was trying to regain my trust of him but eventually things worked out and became better than ever. Eventually he told me he loved me. We spend tons of time together, he takes care of me, I do the best I can to meet needs he has and to better myself for both of us. Hasn't been perfect but it had felt amazing.

Fast forward to a couple days ago. We were at a restaurant and he was trying to show me how to do some stuff on my phone. Then started going through his and showing me to follow suit. It was then I noticed the iCloud data for tinder. I thought about it, and assumed that maybe because it was iCloud it just hadn't deleted that storage. So I didn't say anything. The night was great and he went to work in the morning. The following night, the thought crossed my mind to look at his dating profile. Last logged in, the morning after he left.

So this hurt. And took me back to basically where I was before. Was he bored of me? It felt like a repeating cycle. I asked him about it. He said that it was for boredom at work. He just used it as a "hot or not" sort of thing. To look at pictures. He said it was completely innocent and that he would delete them again. He just thought we were at a point where I could trust him again. But I struggled with his explanation as to why he was using them again. It feels like he was going out of his way to check out girls near him, and putting himself in a position where he could be tempted to cheat. I am unsure about how that all works on OkCupid, however I know If you like someone who likes your photos on Tinder, it opens the possibility for dialogue. He assured me that he never talked to anyone etc and the thought had never crossed his mind. It was just for when he had downtime at work (he works in IT and this frequently happens) when he got really bored and his usual websites weren't entertaining.

I guess my fear is that he gets bored of me. It seems as though whenever we seem to be going so well, he starts to stray. I'm worried that a third time something more serious will happen other than a kiss and some (very) sexual texting. Like he's looking for something he can't get from me. Don't take this as me putting blame on him, a lot of me does feel this must be something I'm doing. I'm also wondering if I should trust what he says? He does always want to see me, spend time with me, talk to me etc. I'm by no means attention starved and like I said, everything has felt great. But my alarm bells go off because of the past. Part of me feels im probably overreacting. Another part has my guard up. I'll throw in that our sex life is great. Very frequent and enjoyable.

I guess I'm just curious what you ladies would do in this situation? And wondering whether I am acting crazy... Heh. Sorry if this was obnoxiously long and if I left something out. Phone typing is a little tedious. But yeah.. Knock some sense into me if need be. :p

Edit: Not sure if it matters, but we are both 23.