Hello, throwaway account that's for a girl been lurking and reading up here.

Some of the aspects of RPW appeal to me, specifically self-improvement and recognizing we are all flawed (in general, coming from a non-American culture the whole "everyone is perfect just the way they are" always seemed nuts to me -- and for a country that spends a ridiculous amount on healthcare the whole body positivity "fat is beautiful" movement just seems like shooting yourselves in the foot).

I'd like to have a redpill relationship minus one aspect.

Growing up, I was diagnosed with a recurring illness that left me severely immunocompromised whenever it surfaced (when covid happened it sent my parents into a nervous wreck). I also have autism. It was fight to get my parents to let me do anything. Everyone always wanted to do things for me, protect me, give me things (if you're hospitalized repeatedly as a kid it seems nobody really knows what to do besides pity you and give you gifts). After 18 years of it I hated it so much. I hated people treating me like I'm made out of glass that would break at any moment, people acting like I can't do anything for myself. I hated people praising me in the hospital for being so "caring" even as I was dying myself. But I lived, and I am incredibly grateful for everything my parents did so that I made it to my 20s in the first place.

However, years later there is nothing that gets on my nerves more for me than somebody trying to provide for me, protect me, and generally do things for me so I don't have to. After a life of hearing my parents, doctors, and friends repeat "We're just trying to protect you" has turned the word "protect" into an instant turn-off. There's nothing that makes me happier now than to be able to go university like a normal kid, be strong enough to carry my groceries in myself (after years of physical therapy) or even just being able to go to the grocery store without fear of catching a cold and dying. There was a time I didn't think I would live to the age where I could get a job, so my first paycheck as an engineer -- paying for my own apartment and medical bills, was a massive celebration for me.

I'd like a partner who is strong, dominant, and good leader -- minus the whole protect and provide part. Is it possible to find that?