I often hear that men’s behavior today is shaped by the manosphere or by how patriarchal society is. But I’m genuinely curious....do women actually believe society has built men to be the way they are?

I do agree that societal norms and traditions have contributed to misogyny — things like believing women should “stay in the kitchen” or shouldn’t have certain rights. But I’d assume we’ve moved far past that stage, right?

Now, I have a more specific question: Do women actually find men attractive who aren’t confident or dominant, but are genuinely good people?

Let me put it this way: Who would you rather date —

an arrogant but successful man who pays the bill on your first date, or

a kind, genuine man who’s financially unstable and socially awkward?

And beyond “who you’d date,” who would you find more attractive?

I’m asking because, if attraction naturally leans toward confident or successful men, then the “competition” among men keeps getting tougher - they constantly have to prove they’re worthy of women’s attention. It almost starts to feel like an interview, where only the most impressive candidate gets chosen.

And with that kind of pressure, competition can easily breed envy, frustration, or even self-destructive behavior - young men trying too hard to be "protective" and and the "smartest" figure in the group and prove something they’re not, and sometimes making a fool of themselves in the process. That's how you get misogyny, manosphere and incel culture - well these are evil intentions and not justified

But it's not the other way round - for most men looks are really important - not saying character isn't important but that's something men deal with afterwards - so basically unless a woman is really unattractive (based on a conventional standards) she shouldn't have a hard time finding a man who likes her.

My goal here isn’t to generalize or complain. I’m genuinely trying to understand how misogyny and feminism work in today’s world - especially from women’s perspectives. I think it’s all about nuance and honest discussion.

Lastly, do you think society alone is responsible for why a higher percentage of men commit crimes or sexual assaults? And that it has nothing to do with biology? If so, how do we explain that even hundreds of years ago - long before media or global influence - women were oppressed in almost every culture, religion, and part of the world?

I’m genuinely here to learn, not to argue. Please be respectful - I’ll do the same. I trust the women here are mature enough to help me understand these dynamics better