The other day, I posted something in the askTRP sub.
I was talking about being stoic and how I 'act' stoic. I subconsciously kept on saying that I 'act' stoic and another member called me out on my shit. He told me that I needed to stop 'acting' stoic and I needed to be stoic. At the time, I disregarded the comment. What the fuck does this guy know, right? I mean, 'acting' stoic has been working for me. Why change it up, right?
Then, today happened.
My friend called me and told me that he needed me to go on a double date with him. I usually never go on group dates because they're dumb and never go anywhere. Nonetheless, this has been a pal of mine since middle school. He's been there for me so I figured I'd reciprocate. I called up this girl that's been all over me, but I have no interest in her. I'm nice to her and I'm interested in a purely platonic relationship. That's all.
Now, something you guys should know about this girl is that she acts VERY different in front of people. I could see it when she first got into the car. She was acting like a child and I punished her by not giving her my attention. In that moment, something hit me. I used to 'act' like I didn't care. However, now, this was something else. When she spoke, I realized that I genuinely don't fucking care. I don't fucking care if she calls me, texts me, fucks me, talks to me about her feelings, and everything under god's green earth.
Usually, I'd be upset. I'd try to get to the root of the problem! Here comes Cap'n Save a Hoe! White Knight in Shining Armor! What's bothering you, my dear? Is it that pesky crush of yours? Oh, poor you! Here, cry on my shoulder!
No. No, this was different. And the funniest part is that it made the date so much better. Even though she was acting differently, I didn't care. I said whatever the fuck I wanted to say, did whatever the fuck I wanted to do, and made sure she was a part of MY frame.
Now, I'm never texting or calling that bitch back because of the way she acted, but that's beside the point. Today was bigger than her, and that's what I wanted to convey. When you 'act' like you don't care, a/k/a 'acting' stoic, you're cheating yourself. Being stoic isn't a strategy to attract women. It is, but not in the way that one might think. Stoicism teaches you that nobody gives a fuck. As Tyler Durden once said: "You are not a special snowflake." Who gives a fuck what you do? Who gives a fuck if that HB9 rejects you? Who gives a fuck if it doesn't work out? Keep. On. Pushing.
When I realized that this girl doesn't fucking matter, because there are tons of females like her, I was able to focus on frame without having to focus. I could be as cocky and arrogant as I wanted because she did not matter to me. Stoicism will change everything for you. People take advantage of attention. It is a commodity and not many men use it correctly. That girl that you're dying to double text wants to text you too. Here's where it pays to be stoic. Who gives a fuck if she doesn't text you back? Fuck her. GFTOW. Problem solved. She isn't special, and neither are you. Therefore, why would she look at you as a guy that 'cares' about her vs a clingy beta that she doesn't want because she wants a man? She can't differentiate.
Fake it 'till you make it. Start acting like you don't give a fuck until one day, you don't give a fuck.
(Disclaimer: This is how I understand things. You may feel free to disagree. I do not think that I know it all and I know I am far away from knowing it all. This post was written to put my thoughts into order and to help kickstart a discussion, and tips for new members.)
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