These days, I consider muself a pretty red pill guy.  I'm in good shape,  successful in my career, spin multiple plates, tease, use light dread, and generally am in control of situations. 

I've long believed that my primary goal in life is finding Ms right. That girl that wows me to the point of wanting to settle down and start a family.  Because I want a family and the good things that go along with it.

The thing is, I've been with many women, and none of them seem to hold my attention for long. Regardless of how much I like them in the beginning, it doesn't take long before I've found some perceived flaw that makes me want to move on.  And I'm talking about hot, passionate women, great lays, fun to be around.

For most of my life I've been seeking, striving to find that one girl. That girl without the fatal flaw.  That girl that makes me want to stop pursuing other girls. My friends tell me I'll be ready to settle down when I find the right girl.

I realized this week that this is blue pill thinking.  Oneitis for a girl in my head.

My SMV is high enough that I have lots of options...and I've felt pretty guilty about playing the field. (Feminine centric thinking again) But the truth is... This is who I am.  I'm always going to want to fuck other girls.  My sex drive is strong, primal.  As men we're biologically programmed to mate with many women... and that drive is strong, at least for me. 

It's not that there's anything seriously wrong with the women I've dated...its just that I like to fuck lots of girls.  And that's OK.

I'm starting to think that guys settle down and get married when they feel like 'this is the best I can do'....and that hasn't happened to me...and may never.

Ms Right doesn't exist.