The other day, I was thinking about guys I know who are successful with women, and how a lot of them actually lack many of the "alpha" traits often described on this thread. They don't have "game," they're keen to show affection, they're not domineering, etc.....yet they're considered very attractive, have been with many women, and (in some cases) are in mutually satisfying long-term relationships.

As I thought about this, my brain blurted out "Really, all it comes down to Confidence, Power, Talent, and Mystery. And if you have high marks on two or more of those things, you're good to go."

Before I continue, allow me to define my terms.

Confidence: Presenting yourself assuredly, smoothly, and clearly. Your directness (and comfort with yourself) extends to others, and makes them feel comfortable as well.

Power: Wealth or social standing; the ability to influence.

Talent: An ability you can perform or execute extremely well, and be recognized for it. It can be (almost) anything, as long as you are legitimately fantastic at it.

Mystery: Unpredictability; your ability to keep people guessing, wondering, and hoping to learn more about you.

Ideally, you want to have high marks with all four of these traits; those that do are (for lack of a better term) the true "alphas."

But for many of us, having high marks on all four just simply isn't possible; no one is perfect, and we all have weaknesses we can't erase. So, the ideal is to score high on at least two of these things. If you do, you don't really have to worry about being "alpha" or having "game."

Think about it: in high school, there was always a loner, "broken" poet/musician boy who seemed to attract a lot of female attention (I can think of several). He may not have had friends or social standing, he may not have had money, and he may not have been socially confident. But he had talent (ability to play music or write well) and mystery (just why is he so broken? Maybe I can fix him!).

Or there's my friend who's a music teacher: he's far from wealthy, has few friends, and no game; but he's extraordinarily gifted musically, and presents himself well. He's got confidence and talent, and he can (and does) have pretty much any woman he wants.

Or maybe there's a guy you know who's successful at his job, has a lot of friends, and presents himself well, but isn't particularly creative/talented or mysterious. He can still slay it, because he's got confidence and power.

So, my advice is, unless your goal is to go to bars and pick chicks up, worry less about being "alpha" and having "game," and instead make sure that you have high marks on at least two of these traits.

These traits are what women are attracted to, and what genuinely galvanize their interest. They're your best shot at creating a rapport or relationship (not necessarily long-term, btw) with a woman that's actually stable and interesting, rather than either

1.) A one-night stand situation, or

2.) An unsatisfying long-term relationship with a woman who saps your energy.

And make sure you genuinely score well on two of these traits; women are good at sniffing out phonies (sometimes not at first, but they'll always find out eventually).

Let me know what you guys think of all this!

(Let me add this final disclaimer: All of this is coupled with being at least moderately fit/in shape, and dressing/styling yourself well. Probably goes without saying, but I want to be sure I state it, lest anyone think I believe that grooming and fitness don't matter)