How do I get over the bitterness toward females?

VZPurp · 2013-11-03T19:35:14+00:00

You can feel sorry for yourself and be pathetic

OR

You can use the information and act upon it to improve your outcomes

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and go after what you want. You need to learn how to not give a fuck, how to ditch the emotions. These are completely irrelevant. How do emotions and dwelling on the past help you at all?

They don't. The only thing you should use the past for is to analyze experiences for what works and what doesn't.

Zackcid · 2013-11-04T03:49:43+00:00

This was a huge fucking journey for me as well. Ups and downs, depressions, amazing time of my life, etc.

Back in your high school, you were fortunate because you had an ecosystem of positive emotions fueling your alpha state. Everything took care of itself because you had friends at every corner enriching your life and girls feeding your social proof. It was basically like a website that runs itself and generates a lot of money with little to no effort. College came along and this ecosystem broke off and you had to start over again. That's when you fell into this negative spiral.

I've struggled with this shit a lot since I've had to move to different schools and cities dozens of times since childhood. The lack of permanent friends really hit hard and made me a generally depressed person.

I've fixed most of this shit, but I can't exactly pin-point what it was that did it for me. It really is a bunch of factors. Gaining weight and working out made me feel healthier and much more confident. This confidence helped my game. Studying game a couple years ago helped me a lot back then, but not so much now.

Also exposing myself to geniuses that changed my perspectives on life. I no longer compare myself mPUAs. This was one of those big realizations I got. I kept comparing myself to the big guys in the game and beating myself up for not fucking 10 women a week. Instead, I've been focusing on my own improvements and congratulating myself for every accomplishment I make.

Also realizing that any man can be part of the 20%. Rather than complain and be bitter, I decided to put in effort to reach that league.

[deleted] · 2013-11-03T19:38:08+00:00

Hola compadre! I accepted it by treating them like children, what they simply adore, even the feminist ones. I didn't give up on love, I believe love is possible, but to get love from a woman you have to build yourself to be The Man. That means learning trp, living trp in its most balanced aspects. I know women will wreck themselves to earn validation from an alpha/real man and I play the role of that man. Better each day. You have to give up on being loved by a women like you are her child (I think this subject was written upon here on this sr). And develop love towards them like a Father loving his silly children and disciplining them accordingly. With this in mind everything is simpler.

Also - on the subject of women sensing if you had sex. I visualized awesome sex before starting my day/going out, to the point of having mad erections (no hands involved). Picture a nice babe, completely willing, surrendering to you, you releasing the animal on her, absorbed fully, enthusiastically etc. Point is, your subconscious does not know what is real what is not (if it knew, you couldn't get an erection or cum on porn) and it's the same subconscious that controls your body language, voice tone and million other things that influence how you will be perceived by others. My friends told me - you look like you fucked last night.

I've had females watching at me, smiling and shit after this visualization, and I've even noticed more beautiful women around me. Law of attraction ? Maybe. Who cares. Important - it worked.

So visualize and than let it go and go about your day. But make a visualization vivid as possible, and surrender to it ( turn off your reasoning, just surrender to the feels of it). Let me know if you had same results as me.

redpilldude · 2013-11-03T19:22:17+00:00

Alright, I'm going to give you some tough advice, but this is the truth. The guys that are in the top 20% didn't just magically appear there. No, we went to the gym and improved ourselves so that we could look better. So, if you want to be in the top 20%, you have to be put in the effort. Nothing is free in life. Stop complaining that you don't look like Brad Pitt and put in the work to improve yourself.

Also, you seem to have a very entitled attitude, and it pisses me off, honestly. After I swallowed the Red Pill, I spent years going to the gym and dieting to make myself look better. Now, I work out 6 days per week to maintain and improve my physique. I never expected anything to be just given to me because I "deserved" it. Based on what you wrote, it seems like you expect to just be granted access to the "top 20% club." Fuck that. If you want into this club, you have work for it.

MockingDead · 2013-11-04T01:46:01+00:00

Most people say a lot of things, let me break it down for you:

1) Lift. This causes you to produce testosterone and endorphins. It is an immediate high with long term rewards 1a) Diet, this also helps build testosterone and accentuates the long term workout rewards

2) Work and Hobbies. This is how you establish frame and build a mental self confidence. There was a video about Frame meaning work. When it came out, i ahd no clue what it meant, but as I dive into a long term project (followed by a second project) I realize the video is true. "Oh, you didn't invite me to a party, fuck if I care, i spent it doing work." "Oh, you don't like me, don't care, too busy." Frame is essentially a castle - I won't digress. But teh minute you have projects more important than women, then you start to have frame. And with frame comes power.*

3) Being social. Going out and doing things. You don't need game - but you do need to go out and interact with humans in a not shitty way. I forgot about this for a while.

4) Game. Ok, if you want to get laid (Something that keeps getting further down on my list), then by all means, learn Game.

*I explained this poorly. basically, make yourself too busy to be bothered being bothered.

magicalbird · 2013-11-03T19:34:29+00:00

Just let go. Don't think about letting go. Don't try to let go.

Just. Let. Go.

widec · 2013-11-03T19:12:10+00:00

Realize that man and women are just programmed in a different way. Just like how women get angry that men will only use them for sex, we might start off angry that women are attracted to alpha traits. They're just programmed to go for certain traits in males, it's a bit foolish in hindsight to be angry at them for pursuing their sexual attraction. Women have to improve their looks to become more attractive, males have to improve their status and personality.

ChaoticParadox · 2013-11-03T19:38:08+00:00

Funny thing is that if you let that bitterness take over and become someone like Ted Bundy you'll have crossed back over to the 20% and get a lot of love letters in jail. Just goes to show that women are ultimately the cause of 90% of male violence.

[deleted] · 2013-11-04T05:50:36+00:00

You are into redpill and you are still on college.

You are a lucky bastard.

ready_uphill · 2013-11-04T07:04:49+00:00

Have you tried having fun? And not caring about what women think? And creating your own reality?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0hg1xWhid8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j72PZY_rzU4

Note: I feel you bro, not trying to come off as rude. I'm just trying to suggest that there's another way. A completely different way than perhaps anything you've ever really done before.

magicalbird · 2013-11-03T21:13:49+00:00

I used to be bitter until I saw women start lining up for me through learning the steps to becoming an alpha

Girls notice when you haven't had sex in a few years, especially when you go to a small liberal arts school and everyone knows each other.

When you graduate make a new circle and things refresh and as long as you start out as alpha they won't question it.

Redpillc0re · 2013-11-04T01:18:40+00:00

Success comes with numbers, so just get over it and realize it's a tough, rigged game, and it's not only the women's fault. So try, fail and improve, it's a veritable jungle.

Age matters too. Women are a lot more willing to choose you as they approach ~30, which gives you the preselection advantage (which is huge).

mordanus · 2013-11-04T04:58:16+00:00

You need to stop blaming women for being women. You seeing them as bad for what they are is the same thing as feminists who hate men for being men. It's like hating gravity. Try instead to see the beauty in it and try to find a harmony for yourself.

Also you should realize that the reason you aren't having success with women isn't their fault. It's yours. Start by fixing you and the rest will just zen together.

BayerischeMotoren · 2013-11-04T17:40:08+00:00

Do you get angry with a pack of wolves for tearing a moose calf to shreds and eating it alive? Do you get upset with a 3 month old infant for crying and being self-centered? Is there any point in being mad at mosquitoes for biting you?

You now have a more truthful understanding of women and the mating market. Use your new found knowledge to your advantage. Bitterness toward women for being what they are is futile. I encourage you to accept this reality and let go of it.

SubjectThirteen · 2013-11-03T19:08:59+00:00

By not giving a fuck. At least that's how it worked for me. I gave little to no fucks about the people that weren't in my immediate circle of friends/family. Focused on School/Work/Health, and stopped giving a shit about what they thought of me.

[deleted] · 2013-11-04T02:23:29+00:00

Grow some balls and realise that the problem here is you, not them. But that's good because it means it can be fixed.

TheeRyanGrey · 2013-11-03T19:47:46+00:00

Realize that the most violent places on Earth are the areas where men are getting the least sex. Don't be one of those men.

Erase the bitterness by going out there and realizing how amazing women can be once you lead them. Then lead them to your bedroom and fuck them silly.

redpillhead · 2013-11-04T01:37:04+00:00

I used to be in that stage as well, honestly I think a lot of guys go through it. In my case I wasn't made at all girls just mad at my ex for how she treated me. As I started reading and learning more, I realised that I was the one making mistakes. I can't be bitter at nature. I can't get mad at water for being wet. I was disappointed in my self. Now I use that knowledge to become the best me I can. I am no longer bitter but I have improved a lot.

cossackman · 2013-11-04T02:17:50+00:00

For those 80% of us men - you have to beat the other 80%. Always have a fallback girlfriend and have multiple 'friends with benefits'.

I was f*cking as many as 4 women at the same time and none knew about each other. The fact I am boring looking probably made it easier to hide it because they never suspected a thing.

[deleted] · 2013-11-04T06:44:21+00:00

stop thinking of them as the enemy. think of them as children. children you have sex with.

[deleted] · 2013-11-04T00:54:43+00:00

You need to realize something.

Women haven't changed. They've been the same all along.

You though, you changed. You stopped working for it. You stopped going after it. Stop being angry at them. They didn't do anything. They are simply reacting to what you show them. Be angry at yourself. You are the root of your own problems.

Are you properly pissed at yourself yet? Good. Now go punish yourself at the gym.

After you do that, your going to need to forgive yourself so you can move on. You're going to have to let go and just live in the moment.

And I need you to believe me on this, when you do that, the moment is going to ROCK.

So you had a bad few years? Welcome to 80% of the guys in the world. But if you make a commitment and truly follow through with it, I guarantee that the last few years will be the worst years of your life.

And they weren't THAT bad were they?

redpill_ta · 2013-11-03T21:38:02+00:00

So, I made a throwaway just for this (been lurking for a long time)

First reply to you: I'm also in the 20%, and also went through this faze. It all started when I began researching PUA, redpill, MRA, feminism and general psychology, sociology of humans. First i felt sorry for myself. Then I was angry at women. Than I was angry at the feminist society. Then I though women were pathetic. Now I release that we're all being screwed over, but in the end, women get screwed over way more. Research 2nd and 3rd wave feminism, but don't focus on the MRA view point of how it hurts men. Think about how it hurts women. You will not believe how self destructive self victimization is ( I would expand on this, how self victimization hurts any group, but that is a touchy subject).

So, you're, probably, in your 20s, not getting any pussy. But research what happens when you turn 30. This is + realizing that it's not womens fault that I did not know how to interact with women and that they were just as frustrated about it as I was.

Note: I'm in the 20% because I've been single for a very long time, live alone, etc. That makes me, for a host of reasons very needy. Which is funny as I've made a career out of gaming men and women very successfully, and I can get any women to fall for me ... as long as I don't want to have sex/relationship with her. It's hilarious how I go from alpha to gamma the second I realize that I like her and this mite be going somewhere.

PS: To those talking about how it's important to be physically fit to game women. Bollocks. Me and two friends were all hopeless AFCs. One looked like a fucking underwear model, and yet, no pussy (sports and nutrition are his primary passions). The other is a gamer, and has not seen the inside of a gym ... ever probably. Both are now very successful with women. Very, very attractive women if I may add. But it does help boost self esteem and confidence and that's name of the game (plus it helps you destress), so the suggestion is on point.

Redpillc0re · 2013-11-03T22:04:18+00:00

It's all about the hunt; you have to beat alphas to their game, it's a zero sum game. Right now, with the fucked up mindset women have, that requires a lot of faking.

Casanova-Quinn · 2013-11-03T22:15:55+00:00

Whats helps me is knowing that women are different than men. Not bad, not good, but different. They are going to act a certain way because it's natural to them. It's a waste of your time and energy to try to change something that is so deeply ingrained. It's like convincing men to stop liking big tits, it's not going to happen. When you realize that, you'll stop "hating the game", and start focusing on learning skills and improving yourself because those are the things you can change.

[deleted] · 2013-11-03T23:59:06+00:00

Bitterness is not for alphas. He deals with reality, accepts it, and moves on to whatever will make him content and satisfied. He is happy-go-lucky in his attitude regardless of his circumstance, he lets the chips fall where they may, and does not allow disappointment to impact his emotions, because how would that possibly help anything? You can act like an alpha, you can look like an alpha, but if you don't also think like an alpha, you will never be alpha. This is an integral part of his attractiveness.

FortunateBum · 2013-11-05T07:10:20+00:00

This is a great question and one I've dealt with for many years.

Fucking lots of women didn't really help.

Not chasing women and going my own way helped. Not caring helped. I was only able to get to this point by actually fucking women. Being in a relationship helps. Being in a place where you can say, I don't give a shit about women, helps.

Whatever you got to do to not chase women at all is what I'd recommend. Let them chase you. It's quite a burden to cast off.

Also, not giving a shit helps. For instance, if you find yourself in a bad relationship, just ignore it and her. Just don't care. They want the drama. They want you to react. Just don't.

Be a rock. Don't chase. Don't care.

After enough time you will realize that what you've done, what you've accomplished, both in stoicism and whatever your unique talents allow, are absolutely not things any woman could accomplish. You will take comfort in this tiny superiority. You will also start to see just how weak and useless women are in general and you might even start to pity them. Fucking is their only advantage. True, it's a nice luxury. But you have everything else.

[deleted] · 2013-11-03T20:58:10+00:00

If you feel angry, feel angry. Don't stop that from improving yourself, though. Emotions are secondary. Growing as a man is primary. Your actions are not the cause of your emotions. Your emotions are the cause of your actions. If you let your emotions control you to the extent of stopping from doing what needs to be done, frankly, you don't deserve to win.

watersign · 2013-11-04T04:04:21+00:00

I'm struggling with this as well. I still feel bitterness sometimes and I manage to fuck girls a decent amount. If anything it makes me resent them even more (when i bang out sluts).

I would reccomend focusing on more impoortant things like your future, career, etc ..if you spend all day being mad about women it's not doing anything for you at all.

Title	How do I get over the bitterness toward females?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	55
Comments	130
Date	November 3, 2013 6:32 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1ptkav/how_do_i_get_over_the_bitterness_toward_females/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/how-do-i-get-over-the-bitterness-toward-females.7666 https://theredarchive.com/post/7666

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