How do you stop a partner from cheating?

The_PUA_Punanny · 2013-07-28T11:27:44+00:00

The whole topic is kind of missing the point, because check this out:

When you go out and hook up with a girl, maybe a one night stand, that is functionally equivalent to being "cheated on" all the rest of the time.

If you are casually hooking up with any number of girls, they are most likely also hooking up with other guys, and it's one big Bonobo circle-boink.

For the average man, if you feel like you want to commit, all you have to do is stop approaching. Instantly, your options evaporate.

For the attractive woman, SHE still has all those options on the table. Men will still approach her constantly.

How many times have you turned down sex from attractive girls? Even a master PUA who walks into a club has to do the work himself. Unless you're a celebrity who is broadly recognized, or a local celebrity, women are not going to approach you. Not the ones you would want!

So that's what you're asking a woman to do -- AND, not only that, but to take responsibility for herself when instead, her WHOLE LIFE, she's been responsive to any man capable of leading her, and following the wisdom *cough* of her gina tingles.

Being able to say "no" to a guy who pushes all her buttons right? She doesn't have that capacity.

The only thing that controls her tingle is if all 4 of the following criteria are met:

She thinks you will find out
You are higher value than the other guy
She believes you will leave
She isn't drunk, intoxicated, or otherwise on drugs

If she's drunk, she will do things she would not do sober, despite blue pill rationalization to the contrary. If she's on MDMA or cocaine or Oxycontin, she will do things she wouldn't normally do. Probably half the women I know have tried cocaine at least once.

If she thinks you won't find out, she will even cheat with lower status males, especially if she's out of town, on vacation, spring break, etc.

If she thinks you will stick around, she will cheat with other high status males and "confess" it to you.

Female fidelity is a myth that blue pillers believe because 1) their girlfriend is not attractive enough to get hit on by high value males, and 2) girlfriends usually don't tell their boyfriends when they have gotten some strange dick.

If you're basing your self worth on whether a woman in THIS culture -- which is bombarding her with feminist propaganda every time she's away from you -- cheats, you might as well build your foundation out of sand. A sandcastle only lasts until a random wave hits it, or the tide comes in.

So if you've been okay with meeting and banging a random chick who was fucking and sucking other guys the night before and will do it again the night after, what's the difference here?

That she's yours? Please. You gamed her, got to know her, but any guy with similar skills can do the same thing.

Anyone who thinks they can lock a woman down without physically locking her down is fooling themselves, and probably selling something to other people who are also petrified with fear of their vaginal mortgage turning into a timeshare.

You might as well ask, "how can I stop my dog from eating bacon offered by anyone but me? When I'm not even around? I don't want a dog that would eat bacon offered by other people when I'm not there."

The only exclusivity you can get with a woman is being the only one to get your DNA into her E-Z bake oven for a given gestational event, and even that has exceptions (fraternal twins, chimeras, etc.).

This is why it's essential to have self esteem that is independent of how you stand in relation to any given woman. Otherwise you're just abdicating your OWN agency to another person and an arbitrary future event over which you have no control, after which you will rake yourself over the coals emotionally. Yes, you do it to YOURSELF. Unlearn the behavior of punching yourself in the "feels" in response to another person's actions. It's YOUR brain, take responsibility for it.

ar10308 · 2013-07-28T01:47:27+00:00

Game, specifically Dread Game.

Basically, you have to make them feel that you are the best thing that can possibly happen to them.

VZPurp · 2013-07-28T02:48:38+00:00

You can minimize it by maintaining behaviors that maintain your relative high value - hypergamy can work in your favor, after all.

If she cheats, kick her to the curb.

rebuildingMyself · 2013-07-28T06:21:32+00:00

An alpha wouldn't have to "guard his territory" like some stray dog fighting off others for a piece of rotten meat.

My g/f turns down "propositions" all the time, usually with a cunty "fuck off" if they are persistant twats. We go on cool dates, we share a few hobbies, we have amazing sex, I maintain an alpha-dominant presence by giving validation only when she does good things like cook for me, I maintain a few friends that give off a "dread game" vibe so she knows I have options, etc.

itslikeboo · 2013-07-28T02:12:40+00:00

you don't stop her.

you do your best to be what she wants. that's your best defense. If she decides to cheat despite you being great, she just will. you don't stop it and it's not even your place to stop it. she's allowed to cheat if she wants -- but then you have to kick her to the curb.

rkg-pua · 2013-07-28T02:13:47+00:00

You dont, especially if you are the genuine beta provider. No amount of money or game or confidence is going to keep your woman from wanting to fuck a genuine alpha cock.

If the opportunity presents itself (which it may never), she is going to cheat. This is TRP, not candy land.

NakedAndBehindYou · 2013-07-28T05:10:17+00:00

You can't stop it. But you can develop inner self confidence that will do several things to help you:

Increase your self-esteem so that you worry less about it to begin with.
Make you more attractive to her in the relationship, since chicks dig confidence.
Make her more likely to respect your boundaries if she knows you won't tolerate cheating.
Even if she does cheat, you will be able to handle it like an adult and not be devastated over it.

2013-07-28T07:37:33+00:00

If she has the oppurtunity to fuck a man signifigantly higher in value than you there is a good chance she will take it. Regardless of how alpha you are this is a possibility. There are always higher status men.

Daimai · 2013-07-28T07:42:17+00:00

Keep gaming them. Never stop.

mechakingghidorah · 2013-07-29T06:48:41+00:00

Dread game, or more specifically you grind her self-esteem into the dust. This isn't good or bad, it just is.

roe_ · 2013-07-28T05:31:19+00:00

Proper mate selection - low impulse control, high partner count, immaturity are all red flags.

Trust but verify:

Password access (for both of you) to phones, facebook accounts, &etc.

Set proper boundaries for behaviour (ie. no GNOs or Vegas trips with divorced/single friends)

Be ready to mate guard in public with uninvited flirting.

(And, as has been said elsewhere in the thread, maintain high value - be ready to walk on the relationship if it comes to that)

(Edit to add: the problem with the "laissez faire" approach to this is that in a LTR/marriage with kids, your lives get entwined together and it's better not to have to pull that apart)

2013-07-28T02:14:23+00:00

You can't. Slime's always gonna be slime regardless of how good your 'game' is.

DesiAntiFeminist · 2013-07-28T03:42:18+00:00

Keep her pregnant.

EleriumAvenger · 2013-07-28T02:08:05+00:00

jealousy shows low value, It shows her you think that the man interacting with her has a higher value then you do. If you maintain a higher value frame you nip cheating in the bud. see side bar for The Sixteen Commandments of Poon for a crash course on high value behavior. http://heartiste.wordpress.com/the-sixteen-commandments-of-poon/

jquest23 · 2014-01-01T19:51:01+00:00

This was awesome. Made a light go on for me.

Title	How do you stop a partner from cheating?
Author	papersize
Upvotes	21
Comments	50
Date	July 28, 2013 1:34 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1j6ylv/how_do_you_stop_a_partner_from_cheating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/how-do-you-stop-a-partner-from-cheating.5915 https://theredarchive.com/post/5915

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